For me, I’m a younger mother. So I woke up one day and realized that it’s just me and her. I’m no longer a kid. I’m an adult with a tiny little human that solely relies on me for everything. Without me, she cannot thrive. I realized that I’m no longer just myself, I’m the life support for my baby. I blinked and the person I once was vanished into thin air. I completely forgot what my life was like before. Now I hear the word “mom” and I still can’t believe that it’s in reference to me. I’m still in shock from how differently my life is after earning the title of “mom”. It’s beautiful, it’s terrifying, it’s hard. Motherhood itself is an amazing yet isolating, horrible feeling for me. I feel like I gained so much but also lost my entire identity. Motherhood is a feeling that is indescribable. I feel blessed and broken.
Stressed, tired, and an overwhelming feeling that your life now revolves around another or others and you play second place. Fatigue and exhaustion like you’ve never experienced in your life. A body that has now been stretched beyond all recognition that will never look as it did pre children. Hours and hours of arguments about why vegetables/healthy food/cleaning your teeth is necessary. Singing nursery rhymes on repeat and realising that you really don’t give two sh*ts that “the wheels on the bus go round and round”. A constant dread that you’ll get a phone call at work that they are ill and know that everyone in the office thinks you’re slacking again as you have to leave early and pick them up from school. The realisation that after about Year 7, you can no longer help them with their homework as it’s too damn complicated.
Oh, last one, the most incredible, mind blowing, jaw dropping love that you’ve never ever experienced for another human being that makes alllllll of the above a drop in the ocean for just one little smile from them, or a kiss or a hug and a “mummy, I love you” 💓
More in depth, I have never felt such unconditional love and absolute fury at the same time.
She just exists, and my heart glows. But then she takes 20 minutes to put on one sock when we are already late for something whilst whinging the entire time and I m a contained bottle of rage saying encouraging and gentle comments out loud and inside screaming “For fucks sake!!!”
I have moments throughout the day where i glance at her and just think “I grew and birthed her, WHAT?!?”
I would take a bullet for her. I have danced like an idiot in public just to make her laugh. I have no qualms about sticking my finger in her nose to pick it or wipe her ass but if any other human on the planet asked me to do those things I would be disgusted.
I see my own expressions on her little face and I adore it.
But boy, am I tired.
I can’t wait till the day she has a bit more independence yet I don’t want to wish her little life away. It’s conflicting.
In a way it’s indescribable, I had heard lots of things but no description sums
up how it actually FEELS.
I think it feels about as different for every individual as what ‘love’ or ‘grief’ feels.
To me it is purpose and joy and selflessness and exhaustion and a constant reminder to work on myself. Having kids tests your limits – all your limits: How you treat people and yourself when you run on no sleep, no peace, no me-time. How you treat your relationship with your partner. How you treat others when they come around you with sound advice (bahhhhh!!!!)
Motherhood taught me that where I thrive in therms of being a *in general considered ‘good’ mother* – and where I lack. It also taught me, that I have a brought a lot of stuff of my own upbringing into this relationship with my kids and its a hard, hard battle to fight this and become better. I also have learned – more than anything – that if you don’t take care of yourself, noone magically appears and does it for you. You have to prioritze a self-care that is not done by a spa day or having half an hour more freetime. You need a purpose outside of being a mom (ideally NOT your job) that is giving you back a true self-absorbed feeling of gaining a *you* – just as a person, an individual, not a mom, nor a partner, nor an employee
Terrifying and amazing, the coolest thing you’ve ever done with your life. But checking to make sure they’re still breathing when they sleep. I remember going home with my brand new baby absolutely TERRIFIED out of my mind bc who the hell left ME with a baby to care for and keep alive?! And it was really hard and weird for awhile. But the overwhelming feeling of love of protection are just not comparable to anything else, ever.
Motherhood feels like a rollercoaster of emotions. It’s about discovering the true meaning of unconditional love while also grappling with a loss of identity, and everything in between. It’s pure joy, magical and beautiful, yet also scary, difficult, overwhelming, and sometimes sad. It can be both heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time.
Motherhood is relentless work. It’s a 24/7 job for life: tiring, demanding, and unending. But it’s also one of the most rewarding roles, filled with deep love, happiness, and connection. It tests your patience and boundaries every day, and at the same time, it builds your confidence and character.
Sometimes it feels like, no matter how hard you try, you’re falling short. And with that comes a lot of guilt. Yet, it’s also fun. It brings out your inner child and helps you see the world through new eyes. It can trigger old wounds, but it also pushes you to grow, heal, and evolve.
Motherhood is a sacred, complicated, and incredibly important role.
For me, it’s an all encompassing feeling of absolute love. I see my sons or even pictures of them and I fall in love with them all over again. Every time.
But it’s so hard on the body and the mind. On the body bc your body changes when you get pregnant and even after you give birth, whether you do it naturally or c-sections like me. I exclusively nursed both my kids so that meant they were literally attached to me 24/7 the first year of their lives and then they still wanted to nurse past that and I didn’t know how to wean them. So I always felt like I smelled like milk. Then mentally, it’s terrifying. I’m so worried something will happen to them when they’re not with me. Like random intrusive thoughts when they’re at my mom’s house where I worry a car will crash into her house and into the bedroom they sleep at when they’re over. Or that the oven will somehow be on and they’ll die of CO2 poisoning. Just stupid shit like that. So I don’t sleep well when they’re not home (I take anxiety medicine for it).
As far as the children themselves, mine are amazing. We’re very involved parents and they both learned to read before or by 3 yo. Academically they’re doing great and they don’t fight with each other bc they’re 5 years apart so no sibling rivalries. The youngest one is the “wild” one but only bc the oldest is so reserved. The wild things he does is not like to brush his teeth, he’s a picky eater, and he likes to pretend he’s a cat and meows answers to me. But even if I’m having a shitty day, all I have to do is look at them and I feel better. Knowing my babies are happy and healthy make everything worth it. I wish I could’ve kept them little forever so I could always carry them around with me but I’m so proud of the people they’re becoming. And I did that! Obvs their dad helped too (he’s a better mom than me lol) but I literally made them. I was their first home so hugs are them coming home. Motherhood is the hardest and most rewarding thing you could ever experience. Mine are 14 and 9 but I can’t wait to see what our relationship will be like when they’re 30 and 35. I’m sooo excited to meet them as adults.
I will say, the reason I’m able to be the mom I want to be is bc I have an amazing partner in their dad. Our partnership is what makes it seem kinda easy bc he’s strong where I am weak and vice versa. The kind of motherhood you have is a bit dependent on the kind of partnership you have with your SO.
I was told I wouldn’t be able to have kids bc of endo so my dude and I spent 8 years together thinking kids were out of the equation. We were super happy with that arrangement but somehow I ended up pregnant. I genuinely had considered an abortion bc I didn’t want our life and relationship to change. Even told him he could leave and I wouldn’t put his name on the birth certificate, but he said I was a fool and he wasn’t gonna lose me to some dude that wasn’t even born yet lol. Almost 23 years later and I still have a crush on him. If anything, having children and him being such a great dad makes me love him more. I think my ambien is kicking in bc I didn’t mean to write so much lol.
You crave a small amount of me time just for you but end up missing them when you get that space so for me parenting is a can’t win situation 😂😂 and you come to realise how easy it is to piss a child off because you gave them a drink in the wrong bloody cup 😂 so in a nutshell parenting is wholesome fun with little best mates that watch you when you piss 😂😂
Imagine having a job where you’re the manager chef nurse teacher and therapist except you never clock out there’s no vacation days and your tiny boss constantly changes the rules.
A rollercoaster of joy, anger, tiredness, happiness, proud moments, frustrating moments, you name it. Best thing I’ve done in my life though. He’s my everything and I cannot imagine a world without him.
It starts with feeling like overripe fruit, to sweet, to juicy, just lying there in the grass, getting eaten by wasps.
Then for a while it feels like you’ve been in a battle, ripped apart and stitched together wrong. Aching, tired, confused, caught in a dreamlike state.
After a while you adjust but you are changed, on the outside and inside.
You feel like a powerful fertility goddess but with an inferiority complex.
Am I good enough? Am I still in there?
Getting high on the smell of their tiny heads. Christmas is fun again!
The constant worry! Viral infections, scraped knees.
Are they okay? Am I messing this up?
You would jump in front of a moving train for them and some days you feel like you already did…
You feel love, so much love. Have I ever felt real love before? Have I ever actually loved anyone? This love seems so much bigger. Sometimes it takes my breath away.
At the same time you are frustrated and hungry, hungry for a book, a glass of wine, an uninterrupted shower even.
You feel frazzled, stressed, buying boxes to organize toys in, buying snacks and packing lunches, the next size up neatly folded in the closet. Appointments, activities, sunscreen, you can’t forget anything.
Temper tantrums and unsolicited advice. Is it my fault? Is this normal for a kid this age?
Happiness and joy but also like being in prison but with less time for reading.
Exhausted, eating standing at the kitchen counter (sandwich crusts, apple slices turned brown)
They will never learn, never sleep, never walk, never stop… But then they do!
Being sad about giving away the baby stuff, the stroller collecting dust in the basement.
Checking on them before falling into bed yourself, kissing foreheads, adjusting blankets.
Feeling like your head is going to explode, feeling like your heart is going to explode.
It’s the weirdest mix of feeling like you have no clue what you’re doing but somehow being exactly what your child needs. My son is 3 now and I still google the most basic parenting stuff but when he calls me mama I know I’m doing something right.
Comments
Like watching your heart walking around.
For me, I’m a younger mother. So I woke up one day and realized that it’s just me and her. I’m no longer a kid. I’m an adult with a tiny little human that solely relies on me for everything. Without me, she cannot thrive. I realized that I’m no longer just myself, I’m the life support for my baby. I blinked and the person I once was vanished into thin air. I completely forgot what my life was like before. Now I hear the word “mom” and I still can’t believe that it’s in reference to me. I’m still in shock from how differently my life is after earning the title of “mom”. It’s beautiful, it’s terrifying, it’s hard. Motherhood itself is an amazing yet isolating, horrible feeling for me. I feel like I gained so much but also lost my entire identity. Motherhood is a feeling that is indescribable. I feel blessed and broken.
Stressed, tired, and an overwhelming feeling that your life now revolves around another or others and you play second place. Fatigue and exhaustion like you’ve never experienced in your life. A body that has now been stretched beyond all recognition that will never look as it did pre children. Hours and hours of arguments about why vegetables/healthy food/cleaning your teeth is necessary. Singing nursery rhymes on repeat and realising that you really don’t give two sh*ts that “the wheels on the bus go round and round”. A constant dread that you’ll get a phone call at work that they are ill and know that everyone in the office thinks you’re slacking again as you have to leave early and pick them up from school. The realisation that after about Year 7, you can no longer help them with their homework as it’s too damn complicated.
Oh, last one, the most incredible, mind blowing, jaw dropping love that you’ve never ever experienced for another human being that makes alllllll of the above a drop in the ocean for just one little smile from them, or a kiss or a hug and a “mummy, I love you” 💓
More in depth, I have never felt such unconditional love and absolute fury at the same time.
She just exists, and my heart glows. But then she takes 20 minutes to put on one sock when we are already late for something whilst whinging the entire time and I m a contained bottle of rage saying encouraging and gentle comments out loud and inside screaming “For fucks sake!!!”
I have moments throughout the day where i glance at her and just think “I grew and birthed her, WHAT?!?”
I would take a bullet for her. I have danced like an idiot in public just to make her laugh. I have no qualms about sticking my finger in her nose to pick it or wipe her ass but if any other human on the planet asked me to do those things I would be disgusted.
I see my own expressions on her little face and I adore it.
But boy, am I tired.
I can’t wait till the day she has a bit more independence yet I don’t want to wish her little life away. It’s conflicting.
In a way it’s indescribable, I had heard lots of things but no description sums
up how it actually FEELS.
Enriching, exhausting, thrilling, debilitating, fulfilling, fascinating, amusing, overwhelming, and I’m sure I’m missing a lot of -ings there.
But overall great adventure. Am enjoying myself.
at first you feel like you’re not doing anything right. exhausting but at the end of the day it is the best feeling ever.
Really, really, really exhausting. And expensive lol
To add to the others an absolute primal mindfuck.
I think it feels about as different for every individual as what ‘love’ or ‘grief’ feels.
To me it is purpose and joy and selflessness and exhaustion and a constant reminder to work on myself. Having kids tests your limits – all your limits: How you treat people and yourself when you run on no sleep, no peace, no me-time. How you treat your relationship with your partner. How you treat others when they come around you with sound advice (bahhhhh!!!!)
Motherhood taught me that where I thrive in therms of being a *in general considered ‘good’ mother* – and where I lack. It also taught me, that I have a brought a lot of stuff of my own upbringing into this relationship with my kids and its a hard, hard battle to fight this and become better. I also have learned – more than anything – that if you don’t take care of yourself, noone magically appears and does it for you. You have to prioritze a self-care that is not done by a spa day or having half an hour more freetime. You need a purpose outside of being a mom (ideally NOT your job) that is giving you back a true self-absorbed feeling of gaining a *you* – just as a person, an individual, not a mom, nor a partner, nor an employee
Terrifying and amazing, the coolest thing you’ve ever done with your life. But checking to make sure they’re still breathing when they sleep. I remember going home with my brand new baby absolutely TERRIFIED out of my mind bc who the hell left ME with a baby to care for and keep alive?! And it was really hard and weird for awhile. But the overwhelming feeling of love of protection are just not comparable to anything else, ever.
Motherhood feels like a rollercoaster of emotions. It’s about discovering the true meaning of unconditional love while also grappling with a loss of identity, and everything in between. It’s pure joy, magical and beautiful, yet also scary, difficult, overwhelming, and sometimes sad. It can be both heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time.
Motherhood is relentless work. It’s a 24/7 job for life: tiring, demanding, and unending. But it’s also one of the most rewarding roles, filled with deep love, happiness, and connection. It tests your patience and boundaries every day, and at the same time, it builds your confidence and character.
Sometimes it feels like, no matter how hard you try, you’re falling short. And with that comes a lot of guilt. Yet, it’s also fun. It brings out your inner child and helps you see the world through new eyes. It can trigger old wounds, but it also pushes you to grow, heal, and evolve.
Motherhood is a sacred, complicated, and incredibly important role.
Like you created something you now can’t live without and it’s terrifying.
[removed]
not planning to be a mom any soon
For me, it’s an all encompassing feeling of absolute love. I see my sons or even pictures of them and I fall in love with them all over again. Every time.
But it’s so hard on the body and the mind. On the body bc your body changes when you get pregnant and even after you give birth, whether you do it naturally or c-sections like me. I exclusively nursed both my kids so that meant they were literally attached to me 24/7 the first year of their lives and then they still wanted to nurse past that and I didn’t know how to wean them. So I always felt like I smelled like milk. Then mentally, it’s terrifying. I’m so worried something will happen to them when they’re not with me. Like random intrusive thoughts when they’re at my mom’s house where I worry a car will crash into her house and into the bedroom they sleep at when they’re over. Or that the oven will somehow be on and they’ll die of CO2 poisoning. Just stupid shit like that. So I don’t sleep well when they’re not home (I take anxiety medicine for it).
As far as the children themselves, mine are amazing. We’re very involved parents and they both learned to read before or by 3 yo. Academically they’re doing great and they don’t fight with each other bc they’re 5 years apart so no sibling rivalries. The youngest one is the “wild” one but only bc the oldest is so reserved. The wild things he does is not like to brush his teeth, he’s a picky eater, and he likes to pretend he’s a cat and meows answers to me. But even if I’m having a shitty day, all I have to do is look at them and I feel better. Knowing my babies are happy and healthy make everything worth it. I wish I could’ve kept them little forever so I could always carry them around with me but I’m so proud of the people they’re becoming. And I did that! Obvs their dad helped too (he’s a better mom than me lol) but I literally made them. I was their first home so hugs are them coming home. Motherhood is the hardest and most rewarding thing you could ever experience. Mine are 14 and 9 but I can’t wait to see what our relationship will be like when they’re 30 and 35. I’m sooo excited to meet them as adults.
I will say, the reason I’m able to be the mom I want to be is bc I have an amazing partner in their dad. Our partnership is what makes it seem kinda easy bc he’s strong where I am weak and vice versa. The kind of motherhood you have is a bit dependent on the kind of partnership you have with your SO.
I was told I wouldn’t be able to have kids bc of endo so my dude and I spent 8 years together thinking kids were out of the equation. We were super happy with that arrangement but somehow I ended up pregnant. I genuinely had considered an abortion bc I didn’t want our life and relationship to change. Even told him he could leave and I wouldn’t put his name on the birth certificate, but he said I was a fool and he wasn’t gonna lose me to some dude that wasn’t even born yet lol. Almost 23 years later and I still have a crush on him. If anything, having children and him being such a great dad makes me love him more. I think my ambien is kicking in bc I didn’t mean to write so much lol.
Motherhood is what you make of it.
Is rewarding yet heartbreaking.
You get to see your little one grow, and meet these new versions of them, but never get to see the smaller ones again.
You crave a small amount of me time just for you but end up missing them when you get that space so for me parenting is a can’t win situation 😂😂 and you come to realise how easy it is to piss a child off because you gave them a drink in the wrong bloody cup 😂 so in a nutshell parenting is wholesome fun with little best mates that watch you when you piss 😂😂
like having a pet but more difficult and expensive for a longer time
Imagine having a job where you’re the manager chef nurse teacher and therapist except you never clock out there’s no vacation days and your tiny boss constantly changes the rules.
[removed]
Like being the manager of a tiny, loud, emotionally unstable rock band that never breaks up
A never ending source of love and worry
Ground hog day the movie! Same shit different day.
Remember, when you are pregnant with a girl, you hold two generations in your womb – 3 in one!
A rollercoaster of joy, anger, tiredness, happiness, proud moments, frustrating moments, you name it. Best thing I’ve done in my life though. He’s my everything and I cannot imagine a world without him.
Tedious, unrewarding.
Giving away every part of yourself to someone else and driving yourself to exhaustion daily and never being more happy about it.
[removed]
It starts with feeling like overripe fruit, to sweet, to juicy, just lying there in the grass, getting eaten by wasps.
Then for a while it feels like you’ve been in a battle, ripped apart and stitched together wrong. Aching, tired, confused, caught in a dreamlike state.
After a while you adjust but you are changed, on the outside and inside.
You feel like a powerful fertility goddess but with an inferiority complex.
Am I good enough? Am I still in there?
Getting high on the smell of their tiny heads. Christmas is fun again!
The constant worry! Viral infections, scraped knees.
Are they okay? Am I messing this up?
You would jump in front of a moving train for them and some days you feel like you already did…
You feel love, so much love. Have I ever felt real love before? Have I ever actually loved anyone? This love seems so much bigger. Sometimes it takes my breath away.
At the same time you are frustrated and hungry, hungry for a book, a glass of wine, an uninterrupted shower even.
You feel frazzled, stressed, buying boxes to organize toys in, buying snacks and packing lunches, the next size up neatly folded in the closet. Appointments, activities, sunscreen, you can’t forget anything.
Temper tantrums and unsolicited advice. Is it my fault? Is this normal for a kid this age?
Happiness and joy but also like being in prison but with less time for reading.
Exhausted, eating standing at the kitchen counter (sandwich crusts, apple slices turned brown)
They will never learn, never sleep, never walk, never stop… But then they do!
Being sad about giving away the baby stuff, the stroller collecting dust in the basement.
Checking on them before falling into bed yourself, kissing foreheads, adjusting blankets.
Feeling like your head is going to explode, feeling like your heart is going to explode.
It’s the weirdest mix of feeling like you have no clue what you’re doing but somehow being exactly what your child needs. My son is 3 now and I still google the most basic parenting stuff but when he calls me mama I know I’m doing something right.