I absolutely love all kinds of cheese. Blue cheese, Parmesan, cheddar, provolone, Swiss, etc. I’ve said multiple times in my life that I can’t imagine living a life without eating cheese. Imagine my surprise when, a month or two ago, I discovered that I’m lactose intolerant. How? Well, I’ve had gastrointestinal issues for as long as I can remember. I even got bullied in school for how long I would spend on the toilet. The thought of being lactose intolerant had occurred to me once before, but I thought that couldn’t possibly be the case, given that I was eating cheese and my life was still pretty much normal. From my perspective, at least. However, when hanging around one of my friend groups a few months ago, I realized that I was passing gas an unusual amount of times. Out of a desire to avoid the embarrassment, I decided to research lactose pills and see if I could find one that would work for me. I ended up finding a brand called “Lactojoy” which completely ended up eliminating any noticeable, repeated gas. Finally, I could eat cheese guilt-free.
Fun fact, did you know that it’s really difficult to start a habit consistently when you’ve never done it before? I decided to treat myself to a meal today, so I went to Domino’s and got an extra cheesy Parmesan stuffed crust pizza with extra Parmesan cheese on top. I also got a few containers of blue cheese to dip some garlic knots in. Guess what I forgot to do before I started eating?
I realized basically immediately after finishing my meal what I had done. I am absolutely not looking forward to the time on the toilet in the coming day or two.
TL;DR – I recently learned that I’m lactose intolerant and ate an extremely cheesy pizza meal without taking my lactose pills.
Comments
So the effects haven’t hit yet?
We demand an update in 24 hours with the aftermath. Bonus points for inventive descriptions of the noises, odors, sensations, and neighbor reactions.
Aged cheeses do not contain lactose. If you’re having issues after eating mozzarella and parmesan cheese, your problem may be something other than lactose.
ETA: Sorry, my mistake. Only hard aged cheeses do not contain lactose, so mozzarella would be a no-no.
If you just finished eating, try taking the lactaid right now. It may not help with all the symptoms, but will likely make things a little easier on you.
Look for cheese flavored pills.
Hi,
Experienced lactose intolerant here;
First off, there’s many ways to deal with lactose! From drops you can put into lactose containing liquids to lactaid and Lactojoy.
I personally use a brand unique to my country, which you can order in packages of 3 little dispensers. I put 1 in my car, 1 in my coat and leave 1 at home. Then my wife also carries one in her purse… Can really recommend finding something similar! — You can also use a pez-dispenser! Or an empty tic-tac pack.
Second; Lactose hits a lot less hard when combined with other solid foods and definitely when not on an empty stomach. Even the pills won’t help thát much if you’re running on empty.
Third; Once you mostly quit lactose, you shouldn’t be troubled for ‘days’ after ingesting some. I had the exact same issue where I walked around with it for pretty much a decade before even realizing the problem. In fact, due to thinking I had bad gut health, I started drinking entire cartons of milk a day! I never made the link in my head, even when the doctor asked, simply because my reactions to it were generally really delayed.
However, now that I’ve quit lactose on the daily, my reaction has severely changed. The effects will hit me within 2 hours if I’m on empty, generally between 3-6 hours when I’m stuffed.
It’ll generally be 1 or 2 trips to the toilet depending on the amount of lactose.
Cheese isn’t so bad though, so it’ll probably won’t be so bad.
As a final tip; If you’re doing something slow (like eating ice cream), try to spread multiple lactase pills over the course of it. I have these small capsules which I love because I can just take a bite of something, add the pill after chewing and swallow.
I hope there’s at least one bit of useful information in here for you.
Update: I watched some undercover boss. I’m honestly used to the effects, so it wasn’t really that bad.