Is it just a universal experience that women want to live in the woods and platonically bring their children up with other women and live harmoniously? Why does it seem so common?
Is it just a universal experience that women want to live in the woods and platonically bring their children up with other women and live harmoniously? Why does it seem so common?
r/AskWomen
Comments
I haven’t heard of this before but maybe I’m the minority. I have wanted to move to the countryside with my kids to raise them but not with other women (or men for that matter). The peace it seems to bring to be somewhat removed from other people is alluring, I guess.
Because “it takes a village” didn’t come out of thin air. A lot of places used to have children cared for by many other mothers and grandmothers in the community. Women helped each other a lot.
I’m not sure about universal, but it’s certainly common in my circles.
I think this is a recent phenomenon. Women are starting to give up on the idea that men can be in an equal relationship with us. The example they set for our children, especially our young boys, does not inspire confidence in their ability to raise decent human beings going forward.
No, some of us very much do not want to be raising children with other women in the woods. In fact I can’t think of a single thing I would like to do less.
I desperately want this.
Haven’t heard of that at all actually. As a pagan and as a queer person I’ve seen the whole “start a commune” thing, but never in a strictly gendered way like that.
Universal? No.
Is it common among humanity to long for a safe and peaceful place where you can feel content and cared for among your loved ones? Probably. Living harmoniously with people you love in a place that brings you peace is likely a dream for many. What that looks like is probably very different for different people. My imaginary place of peace wouldn’t involve raising children together, but I’m sure that is vital for someone else’s place of peace.
What? I’ve never heard of this. I will take raising children with my husband any day of the year.
this is a chronically on tik-tok take.
If I am moving out to the woods, it’s to have lots of open space to the be the biggest freak I can be. No interest in having or raising children.
Absolutely not, i can’t imagine anything less appealing. Sex is important to me, i’m exclusively attracted to men, i’ve historically hated living in rural areas, i don’t want a roommate or anything to do with raising kids.
No. I very much do not want to do this.
This seems to be one of those things people say but never really mean.
Like moving to Europe.
Everyone says it, but no one actually takes the steps.
This is not common.
That sounds seriously awful to me, so no, it’s definitely not universal.
No, it’s not universal. I have never once wanted to have children or to be around a large group of other women. That sounds ripe for bullying and eventually a cult. And since I’m probably autistic, I’d be among the first targets for bullying and then abuse and murder in a cult ritual.
It seems so common to you because of whatever you’re engaging with on some algorithm-driven social media.
In the woods? No.
In a cul-de-sac near the school with all my friends and their kids? Absolutely.
From my large friend group when I lived in Texas, I have 3 friends who moved to NM and bought a house together. 2 got divorced and 1 is a widow. They have 4 kids between them and are all mom to the kids. They are all incredibly happy. They pool resources and time, 1 works from home, 1 is a teacher and has summers off and 1 is a Red Cross nurse who ‘deploys’ with natural disaster relief so she can be gone for weeks at a time when things happen.
For the rest of our group of friends, if any of us end up single, we either plan on putting in an addition to the house or buying a house on the same block so we can support each other.
So far its been 5ish years since they got the house (end of 2019) and they couldn’t be happier.
This is both propaganda and based on the fact that: many men have proven to be unfit to parent and provide appropriate support (beyond monetary).
>is it just a universal experience
I’m enjoying raising a kid in the city with my husband, so….no.
>why does it seem so common?
You’re in a TikTok bubble.
That is my ultimate dream life. But I’m a small town girl who moved to big cities, lived everything I possibly could and now I just want to return to a slower pace of life. I don’t know many women (or men for that matter) who want this.
No, I love my husband very much, just him, the kids & me would make me completely happy.
No. Everything about that sounds like torture.
I’m good being childless, with my boyfriend, in a big city, thanks.
Whenever women friends would make wonderful food, I’d jokingly propose and say we could have a lovely home and make lovely food for one another. “We’d be so fat and happy!”
I also think retiring with a bunch of friends like Golden Girls would be great. But living in the woods with a bunch of moms and kids? Hell no. I like civilization and peace too much.
It’s not common at all in real life
My best friend and I made a pact that if our husbands leave us or something we’re going to raise our kids together in the woods on a huge property. It’s just a silly thing, I haven’t heard it being all that common? I prefer my nuclear family anyway.
I have no desire to live in the woods (bugs, ew) or raise kids (kids, ew), but I do appreciate the idea that families can be whatever we want them to be, and co-parenting doesn’t always need to be between a woman and a man or even with a romantic partner. I’ve seen a few stories where sisters or platonic besties live in the same house with their respective kids, and i think that’s a wonderful way to help and support each other.
I very much do not want to live near the woods
oh god no, that sounds like my version of hell.
Blame TikTok’s for this one, I’ve seen it often on there.
Although my friend and I did both joke that if our marriages went down the pan we would just move in together and raise our kids together to make it easier haha.
As it stands we are both happily married to men who are very present fathers so it won’t be happening!
Woods? Check. Children? I would love that 🥲. Platonically raising them with other women? …no thank you. I would prefer to raise them with their father, non-platonically.
I was open to the idea of the whole “community” thing a while back. Then I lived with some people who wanted to do that, and I will not do it again.
Ugh, no. Have you been to the woods? Have you seen the accomodations? Neither living in the woods nor raising children is for me and many of my women friends.
Some women DO have this fantasy that there was a time in the past when life was simpler and one could sit around the fire and churn butter with friends while the children play peacefully with Bambi and Thumper. And it would be pretty dope to do this with fabulous women who help out, instead of some dude who complains a lot but doesn’t help out. And this fantasy is getting sold back to us on the daily.
I’d say a different, but related, fantasy is more common: to live in the woods and have a magical community with other women when we’re OLD.
It “seems common” because your tiktok algorithm figured out that you’ll watch those shorts to the end.
It absolutely is not.
I would rather have an aneurism than do this.
No one wants to live in the woods.
I have a nice clean bed at home, with a silk comforter and lots of pillows. Not something easily found in the forest.
Surrounded by like-minded women sounds good, though, as long as I don’t have to get out of bed to mingle.
You lost me at bring kids up with other women. But living in the woods alone sounds like a dream.
You know what smells terrible? Untreated sewage from living in the woods. You know what’s super germy? The great outdoors. Refrigeration keeps food spoilage at bay, and modern medicine saves lives.
We have spent thousands of decades getting civilized, and I’ll be damned if I’m going backwards now.