I 29F was recently looking at some photos my boyfriend 32M took of me and us together on our Disney trip when I came across a screenshot of a conversation between him and another girl on instagram.. my boyfriend messaged her “2023, Asian fest. Sorry I’m just now saying hi, things have been pretty busy lately.” Her response back was “sorry I don’t remember (with emoji)”. Then he messaged back something like “No worries! 2023 was my peak year, but I guess I didn’t make a big impression.” Then she left him on read. I haven’t addressed it with him yet because if it’s really just seems like a friendly chat I don’t want to make a big deal of it. I’m not sure he really knows her or has ever met her in person. They live in different states, but they’ve been following each other for a while. Not sure why all of a sudden he reached out to her. He’s also traveled a lot for his schooling so he could have also just known her briefly. He’s never done something like this before. What would you do in this situation? Would you just brush it off and see if anything actually happens? I’m not sure if I’m reading too much into it.
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Honestly, that message sounds more cringe than shady.
I’d bring it up casually, not accusatory, just “Hey, I saw that message, what was that about?”
His reaction will tell you everything.
Were you together at the time? If yes, then you should 100% be worried, this behavior tells you a lot about his character. Would you have done the same? How do you think he would have reacted if he found out you had done the same thing he did? The fact is that this was a gateway, he reached out purposely, not randomly, he had something in mind. What would have happened if she remembered him? How do you think that conversation would have played out and impacted where you are now with him. Overall, he did it once while you two were together, now you know he can do it again.
Where you 2 together in 2023?
They obviously met.
Just ask him. Maybe there was a really specific reason he reached out to her (which isnt about cheating) or maybe he got reminded of her recently from something and just wanted to reconnect.
Or maybe not but id say dont panic yet.
Could mean literally anything.
I mean, I would question my partner about that. I think it’s reasonable. If it were a dude, would he have messaged him?