My 13yo son gets angry and frustrated when he’s not immediately successful, sometimes blaming those around him. I would appreciate any advice on how to connect with him or help him manage his temper. He was not angry prior to puberty, which i think is relevant.
My 13yo son gets angry and frustrated when he’s not immediately successful, sometimes blaming those around him. I would appreciate any advice on how to connect with him or help him manage his temper. He was not angry prior to puberty, which i think is relevant.
r/AskMen
Comments
He is a teenager.. Just be calm around him and he should grow out of it eventually.
Puberty is definitely a reason if not the reason he is becoming more angry my advice is to help find him a outfit for letting out anger when I was a older teenager concerts helped me
Does he destroy things, hurt himself, or others? Of course not, then emotion is fine. He just needs healthy outlets like sports or jiu-jitsu where he can channel his feelings and learn perseverance, a valuable life skill those pursuits naturally teach.
Get that guy into sports, killer mentality /s
Jk he’ll calm down.
You need to instill in him immediately the idea that he is not good enough yet to get angry.
If you do not do this immediately, it will worsen to the point he will stop trying new things because he is afraid of failure and it will be a life long handicap he lives his life with.
Make him understand it’s ok to fail if you learn from your failures tell him his goal should be to keep making mistakes but never make the same mistake twice.
Tell him even Tom Brady (maybe he’s still in the zeitgeist) Patrick Mahomes (probably the old head to your boy) and Bo Nix (the next big thing) throw interceptions sometimes.
Team sports. More the better.
Be calm. Acknowledge his frustration, but don’t engage in the aggression. He needs to learn to manage his anger. He won’t learn that if you two rile each other up.
Therapy, why has no one mentioned it yet
He may not have gotten angry previously but was he naturally one of those kids that never had to work that hard to be good at something or has he just started to care more about certain activities?
Teen boys NEED a physical outlet, one that challenges them.
Biking, sports, martial arts, weightlifting…. Something!
His testes are producing testosterone, and he has to acclimate to this stage of life that will last well into middle age. Might let him know what is happening to him and it is normal, BUT not an excuse for bad behavior.
Can you give an example?
It seems this day and age that a lot of kids don’t have the grit or understanding that they aren’t some prodigy/superhuman that can do everything the first time. Not sure if its some sort of instant gratification thing or what but seen several episodes with different children and the sheer amount that get frustrated ans angry they cant hit a homerun every time they are at bat, aren’t getting a VR every time in FN and everything else and I’m at a loss on why that is
Help him curb it now so they don’t become the toxic adult nobody knows how to deal with at work or in social circles. It’s not like he’s a monster to deal with.. but you can help work with him to get through it
My kids are the same. They all have ADHD.
Being a teenager, for some kids, is hell. Stand by him, but define boundaries clearly. Watch for self-harm.