I know it’s a UTI. It’s always felt like this whenever I get one. I get them every 2 months!!! I clean with no fragrance non-antibacterial soap every single day there. I wear absolutely no synthetic underwear. I make sure I wipe front to back. I take D-mannose supplements every single day. I make sure I get it all out before leaving.
It’s probably where my boyfriend doesn’t clean that great before we have sex even though I ask and plead everytime. I’m working on it. We’re working on it.
What do I do? The cost is eating me up. I’m in college, Medicaid won’t take me because of my lack of job AND I can’t have a job currently because of my programs intensity. I can only go to the urgent care so many times. I have no doctor or primary care.
I’m so tired.
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If your boyfriend cares about you at all, he’ll clean better. Or no sex. It’s that simple.
What do you mean you “ask and plead”? Wtf is his problem?
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. UTIs are awful.
Your boyfriend’s chronic lack of cleanliness is clearly enabling your UTI issues, so you need to set some firm boundaries before getting intimate, like demanding he shower first and using condoms until his habits improve.
I have a pretty strict rule that we shower before sex. Sure, it can “ruin the spontaneous chance” that people enjoy but not having to deal with the various issues we can get due to hygiene is worth it to me. Thankfully my partner totally gets it, so there isn’t a fight.
I would suggest setting strong boundaries if you think it’s coming from your partner. You can have just as much fun teasing in the shower followed by more warming up after you get out.
Two things: if he’s not going to wash himself dump him. There’s no excuse, that’s disgusting. If he cared about you he would.
Second thing: do you fully remove all your hair down there? Many women find that they struggle with UTIs and yeast when they go bare, because the hair is home to a microbiome that helps regulate everything. Consider growing hair back and see if that helps.
Does your college have a student health service?
Should be cheaper than urgent care and if you can establish them as primary, you can get prophylactic UTI meds vs always getting urine tests
NO sex until he respects you and your health!! does he know that UTIs can kill you? does he care at all that it’s affecting your health, emotional wellbeing, and draining your finances? If my partner was struggling with health issues due to my hygiene I would IMMEDIATELY correct it. This man apparently does not respect or care for you and you’re enabling it
Are you drinking enough water everyday? I pee every 2hrs myself.
Also, always use condoms when having sex and go pee as soon as you’re done. You seem to be doing everything right.
I used to have yeast infections constantly with my ex. He refused to treat his penis with the anti fungal cream. I told him he needed to use a condom from now on. Never had another yeast infection after.
I’m no longer with him for various reasons. Haven’t had an infection since.
I used to get UTIs all the time sleeping with people who didn’t care about my wellbeing. Literally…I had my physician on speed dial who gave me his personal number to call anytime I needed him to send Bactrim to the pharmacy because I had one THAT frequently.
I’ve been with my partner for 10 years and I’ve been UTI free since. Because he cares about me and my health and cleans himself before we have sex.
Stop sleeping with your boyfriend until he does the same.
Oh hell no. Sis, respect yourself 😭
How is your boyfriend seeing you suffering like that, and doing your utmost on your side of things, and he can’t…wash his thing? Like basic hygiene?
You matter less to your boyfriend than the 2mn it would take for him to make sure you’re healthy and comfortable.
Do not have sex with him if you aren’t both freshly showered.
You cannot afford to have sex with his dirty dick. Health wise and financially.
He is making you sick. He is so unwilling to clean himself before having sex with you that he is giving you an infection on a monthly basis.
Girl.
This is not what love looks like.
Planned Parenthood or Wisp, both online. But also, do not fuck your boyfriend until he washes his dick! What the hell?!
Condoms? I had chronic uti’s and learned it’s something with most condoms. The only one I found that didn’t cause issues was trojan bareskin.
If you didn’t have this problem before the boyfriend, it’s the boyfriend. If the boyfriend doesn’t clean himself up before sex after knowing it’s a problem that is causing you pain and costing you money, then dump the boyfriend.
However, if you’re really susceptible to UTIs, you may get them after sex even if you’re both having a good shower right before and you’re peeing after. Not defending that boyfriend if he isn’t staying clean, but it might not be his fault here. Some of us are just deeply unlucky like that. :C
Full stop, he needs to take care of his hygiene. If he doesn’t, dump him. It’s not worth your health for him to be disgusting, and you definitely don’t need to be sleeping with him and rewarding his gross behavior.
You didn’t mention it but another thing that helps me is peeing immediately after sex, to flush out any bacteria that may have gotten in the urethra. Other than that, he needs to 100% be clean, like a shower, brush teeth, scrub his hands and nails clean. I’m shocked you’re not getting yeast infections or bv too thanks to his nasty habits.
You shouldn’t be begging someone for basic human hygiene. There are much better and cleaner men out there.
Just leave your boyfriend? He clearly doesn’t care about you if he’s willing to let you be in excruciating pain so often.
Otherwise I would suggest stop using soap on your vulva. That could be irritating you even more and it’s actually not super necessary. Are you peeing right after sex as well?
I used to get a UTI every 2-3months until I switched to progesterone-only birth control. Every nurse and clinician I saw said the birth control couldn’t be the cause but…it was. Until I finally figured it out, Azo was my best friend- literally the only thing that would fix me. Also, your boyfriend is disrespectful.
Edit – this stuff: https://www.safeway.com/shop/product-details.960020294.html
There’s no “working on it” he is willing to do it or he’s not. Why doesn’t he care about your health?
Stop letting him put his dick or fingers near your vagina until he goes into the bathroom and washes with soap. Frankly, supervise him to make sure he does.
Or make him put on a glove before touching you, and a condom before sex.
Stop asking him to care about the fact that he’s literally making you sick. Set boundaries, and enforce them.
Also, every time your UTI hurts you, pinch him hard with your nails.
Also, when you are on antibiotics, your birth control may fail, so don’t have sex without a condom until you have finished the antibiotics plus a whole month.
Also, make him pay for the damn doctor appointment, antibiotics and AZO.
Or, skip these suggestions, and dump this man child who clearly doesn’t give a shit about you.
Both of you shower before sex and clean thoroughly, or no sex. This is non negotiable. If you need to plead with him and work on it, then dump him. It’s really not that hard to shower before sex, and him fighting you on it shows a total lack of respect for you. He knows you’re in discomfort, it’s a small thing to do.
You need to pee after sex, and then shower again.
Keep well hydrated.
He‘s probably giving it to you repeatedly and would need to get treated too.
I wouldn’t be having sex at all until he gets his shit together. That’s unacceptable.
Quit having sex and see if it gets better. Pee before and after sex once you start back and make him shower beforehand.
So your boyfriend is making you sick through his nasty habit and you keep letting him?
Read your post back to yourself and try to imagine a friend or sister wrote it. Do you really want to have to beg a grown man to clean himself? Basic hygiene is too much of a stretch for him? Cut him loose. He doesn’t care that you’re suffering or that he’s dirty enough to be the cause. At the very least stop fucking him and I bet your recurrent UTIs magically disappear.
Stop having sex with him!
…..I’m not giving advice, because everything you read will tell you not to buuuut….i suffered from UTIs and yeast infections nonstop for years due to my horrific endo periods.
Tea tree body wash finally put a stop to all that. It burns at first before you get used to it. I haven’t had an infection in years. Over time I’ve gradually returned to just using feminine hygiene wash down there, but on my periods I’ll use the tea tree wash again.
Girl wym what do you do 😭 you don’t have sex with him until he gets his dick clean