Hi everyone! My husband M31 and I F31 have been together since we were 19. Married with 2 children before 24. We both got out of military within a year of each other with me being the one who got out later (people like to assume he’s the only one who served) and moved to my home state.
Context: When we started dating he pulled out all the stops. So I love being outdoors and just exploring everything life has to offer so for 2yrs before we had our first baby he would take me on hikes and visit random towns. It was honestly so much fun. We both worked hectic schedules so when our kids came into the picture of course life slowed down. No more date night or random day trips as we had no support system where we were stationed.
But now we have both been out of the military for over 2 years. Everyone jokes how he really played me because he hates being outside, the beach, hiking, trips of any kind and would rather just be at home. Honestly I’m just so heartbroken and I feel like a loser for falling for it if that’s true.
I know he struggles with his mental health we both do but he seems to be contempt with letting it run his life. It’s been so long since I’ve been truly happy. my kids are my everything. I honestly think sometimes it would be easier if he just left. I don’t know I feel like I am just a mix of emotions from being blindsided to trying to understand him more.
We have done couples counseling before it really got us no where because as a working mom I was doing all the housework & taking on the mental load our therapist said I should be grateful for the little things…. Like him grabbing me ice cream if I text him or doing the dishes if I ask. I’m in therapy and he was but recently stopped. Sorry for the long post I’m completely lost and thanks for any advice.
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Backup of the post’s body: Hi everyone! My husband M31 and I F31 have been together since we were 19. Married with 2 children before 24. We both got out of military within a year of each other with me being the one who got out later (people like to assume he’s the only one who served) and moved to my home state.
Context: When we started dating he pulled out all the stops. So I love being outdoors and just exploring everything life has to offer so for 2yrs before we had our first baby he would take me on hikes and visit random towns. It was honestly so much fun. We both worked hectic schedules so when our kids came into the picture of course life slowed down. No more date night or random day trips as we had no support system where we were stationed.
But now we have both been out of the military for over 2 years. Everyone jokes how he really played me because he hates being outside, the beach, hiking, trips of any kind and would rather just be at home. Honestly I’m just so heartbroken and I feel like a loser for falling for it if that’s true.
I know he struggles with his mental health we both do but he seems to be contempt with letting it run his life. It’s been so long since I’ve been truly happy. my kids are my everything. I honestly think sometimes it would be easier if he just left. I don’t know I feel like I am just a mix of emotions from being blindsided to trying to understand him more.
We have done couples counseling before it really got us no where because as a working mom I was doing all the housework & taking on the mental load our therapist said I should be grateful for the little things…. Like him grabbing me ice cream if I text him or doing the dishes if I ask. I’m in therapy and he was but recently stopped. Sorry for the long post I’m completely lost and thanks for any advice.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.