I am curious about your preferences in flirting. I have been out on the dating apps for a few months now. I am in an ENM relationship and started recently to go out to find FWBs for fun, casual dates. I am at a point in my life where I am experiencing a mega spike in my libido and that combined with my straightforwardness creates a monster :)). Well, not really, but close enough.
I was talking to a guy I matched on one of the apps and I find him ridiculously hot and would love to sleep with him. And we have long very hot conversations and I am definitely not holding back in expressing I want him, and be verbose about the things i would do to and with him. Not filthy, but direct. (Example: he asks ‘when can we meet’ and I reply “i am one naked photo of you away from booking my flight for this evening and wait for you on my knees in your hotel room so you can c*m on my face.”) And while he responds greatly to it 90% of the time…… at times I see him taken a bit aback by it. And I re-read my texts and I realize I flirt with him the same way men have flirted with me through time. Very clear, very much complimenting, expressing desire in a filthy or kinky way and offering praise. I have noticed this slight discomfort with other men too.
So here I am, asking the question: what great flirting looks like to you guys? I keep on reading the word “confidence” and “enthusiasm” in all replies here when people ask what do you want from women. Are these two traits not meant to be combined with sluttiness and sexual freedom of expression?
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I think most men just went used to that kind of flirting but I can’t say as I don’t get flirted with
We get so little of it that honestly, we tend to be more easy going about it
I’m always amused when someone has an experience with one person and then asks if it’s a thing for the entire gender lol.
Yes many men enjoy straight forward or “shameless” flirting. As a general rule people like to feel desired and certainly shameless flirting can communicate that with more clarity than more subtle forms of flirting. But there’s obviously nuance. Some people will have had a conservative upbringing and won’t like flirting that’s too dirty and might prefer flirting that’s more subtle or they may like it but aren’t used to it so will be, initially, taken aback by it. Others might prefer some type of chase so shameless flirting might detract from the fun they’re used to when you reciprocate interest too easily. Others might make a value judgement on you and assume you do this with everyone which might lower the sense of feeling “desired” in a special way. Some guys might be after a serious relationship so being too hot and heavy at the start might give them the impression that you’re not looking to be serious (which in your case you aren’t by the sounds of it). And some guys just aren’t that big into flirting. There’s far more variance between individuals than the genders.
He’s probably a bit taken back. Your best bet is to ask the person you’re talking to.
It depends. This is my personal thoughts. If it’s too much too early it’ll raise red flags, come off as promiscuous or like you’re joking or disingenuous. If i met a girl on a dating app and she’s flirting like that then it’s clear she just wanna hook up which is cool if that’s what i want from her. But obviously if we’ve been on several dates and are growing closer then flirt as much as u want. As a guy i love feeling wanted or desired.
Yes, but we’re quite new to it, so that’s going to get real awkward in the end if we’re not attracted to you, and you keep going.
Simple answer: Depends on what that man wants. He most probably wouldn’t mind when its about casual stuff. He might mind if its actually meant to open the door to a relationship, however some men don’t mind it under those circumstances either. The thing is: When you do something with someone you get to know, they will think this is normal for you – meaning they will assume this is not the first time this has happened. And promiscuous behavior usually is accompanied by certain concerns like that the motivation for this clear pushing is desperation/mental instability or that the one making advances may have an STD. They cant know.
For me, please be direct, please actually tell me or show me, not through visual hints that you’re interested. I can’t see visual stuff, I don’t understand body language, so this is the only way I know that a woman is interested.
It may set off bot vibes, especially if you met on the apps. “If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is” applies here. You could suggest FaceTimeing to show that you’re real.
Some of us do, some of us don’t. It all comes down to preference. I wouldn’t mind were I not dating another man atm so long as it isn’t being done in an aggressive or pushy manner. To me good flirting is a playful back and forth banter filled with genuine small talk, jokes, innuendos, compliments, smiles, and laughter. Neither person is left hanging, and even the awkward silence moments are embraced. Authenticity is one of the most attractive things a person can do. Das it.
The level that you’re “flirting”, it would make me think that you will eventually try to get me to join your OnlyFans page.
I wouldn’t call what you’re doing “flirting” as much as I would call it “sexting”. It’s fine for a woman to be aggressive about physical intimacy, but i can see some traditional men getting red flag vibes as they start to ask if it’s them that you desire or if it’s just male attention that you crave.
At the risk of sounding like Dr. Freud, what was your relationship like with your father? The only reason I ask is I’ve met a lot of women that have had strained relationships with their father and the craving of male attention can become insatiable for them.
And of course, there are some women that just love indulging in the sensual, in which there’s nothing wrong with, but different men will interpret it differently, and that’s where a conversation needs to happen.
I enjoy shameless flirting from men too.
as always it depends on a number of factors – the woman in question, the style of flirting, the man’s tastes, the context, etc
Honestly your answer to “when can we meet” feels quite off-putting to me. It sounds like over the top sexy/dirty talk to avoid answering the actual question. To me it would be apparent that you don’t actually want to meet.