TIFU by not knowing the dress code and panicking

r/

Got invited to kind of a “summer hangout/Pool party/ day drinking stuff” and showed up in a bikini, a cute fishnet top with a silk scarf, sunglasses, and my Jacquemus bag feeling iconic and was like in the mood to go to a festival or something. Everyone else wore linen shirts and chill shorts. Total startup energy. I barely knew anyone and so I didn’t even walk in. Saw the crowd from a distance, realized I looked like a cringe music video extra, panicked and left. Now I regret it, because it could’ve been a great chance to meet new people. Wish I’d stayed and owned it, but I kind of panicked and left. What makes it worse is that the person who invited me is actually kinda cute. Super Great. Now I’m the “unfriendly girl who ghosted the barbecue.”

TL;DR: Misread the vibe, dressed completely wrong in a full Coachella-like outfit, bailed before even saying hi, and now I feel dumb.

Comments

  1. PixielFantasticIron Avatar

    The classic “ready for Coachella, landed at a startup barbecue” maneuver. Iconic.

  2. ethanduong Avatar

    idk but my insecure and anxious ass would be so glad I didn’t put myself in that situation

  3. cochese25 Avatar

    Why didn’t you just go home and change?

  4. ClaraWaves56 Avatar

    Honestly, you were the main character just at the wrong episode. Don’t sweat it. Confidence in that outfit would’ve made you unforgettable… now you’ve just got a mysterious entrance and exit. Iconic either way.

  5. internetthought Avatar

    Just apologize and say you were on your way, decided to get a skinny oatmeal blueberry macha chia drink and while driving this a#hole swerved in front of you causing the automatic braking system of the car to activate and ruining your outfit and car interior … Or something 

  6. Silveriovski Avatar

    If there was a pool maybe they could have gotten your attire later.

  7. olivinebean Avatar

    Girl, someone has to set the bar.

    Life is too short to not have a life because a few people might think you’re overdressed. If you let that change how you live then you’re not living at all.

  8. brisket_curd_daddy Avatar

    If there’s a pool, then ya boy is getting into the pool. I’d have let it ride, but I understand the apprehension.

  9. chantillylace9 Avatar

    This is similar to my worst nightmare where I go to a costume party or go to Work dressed up and not a single other person is dressed up lol

  10. RegularOdetta Avatar

    Oh well, you were having a brat summer moment. You probably looked great! Next time, just rock up into the party. After a few drinks no one is gonna care about over/under dressing, if ever.

  11. Ninguna Avatar

    Just tell the host you had to shit.

  12. jellylime Avatar

    The real lesson here is: you can always take layers off, but you can’t add them on once you’ve left the house.

  13. DiScOrDtHeLuNaTiC Avatar

    Reminds me of the time N.D. Stevenson got invited to a party and for whatever reason, enough wires got crossed to where he mistakenly thought it was a cosplay party and went dressed up as Hawkeye from the MCU. But it worked out because people kept coming up to talk all night. 😁

  14. C-D-W Avatar

    Made it farther than me. I’d have never made it out my own front door.

  15. awfulhospital Avatar

    coming from someone w anxiety – if you want to, explain to the host what happened – they’ll understand and won’t think you’re unfriendly or rude, these things happen and nobody will be mad at you

  16. Francl27 Avatar

    I would have done the same but you should have owned it and just jumped in the pool.

  17. Hillyleopard Avatar

    Id text him and explain, I’m sure he’ll understand and it’s better than leaving him thinking it’s because you didn’t want to go

  18. Iamatworkgoaway Avatar

    My first real date when I was 16, I invited a girl to a Semi-Formal party. I was in a button up and tie, she was in a dress, everybody else showed up in jeans and tee’s. We bounced after 30 minuets.

  19. Ridge_Hunter Avatar

    So food for thought for the future…bring a change of clothes or two for occasions when you’re not quite sure. I’ve never personally done this for a pool party like described, but I have done it for work meetings/trainings where I wasn’t exactly sure what to expect. It’s saved me on more than one occasion where a tie was required but not necessarily stated ahead of time…also where jeans and a polo were on the borderline of being overdressed but you start off in dress pants and a button down…so yep… I tend to over prepare these days due to those situations

  20. ProperLadInnitBruv Avatar

    nah girl you weren’t overdressed, they were underdressed. should’ve walked in like you were the vibe. next time just serve and let ‘em catch up 🖤

  21. 4_celine Avatar

    Next time, pretend you’re on the way to a cooler party and just dropping in!

  22. jezebeljones666 Avatar

    Get in the pool right away and look like u just luv to swim🧜‍♀️

  23. Emmy314 Avatar

    Oh, that happened to me back in high school. There was a boating party, so I wore shorts and a top, all the other girls were in cocktail dresses. I obviously still think about it 35 years later.

  24. RedditReallySucks1 Avatar

    I hope you explained this to the person who invited you, I’m sure they’d understand that.

  25. olivefreak Avatar

    There’s a movie called Protocol starring Goldie Hawn and I think you would really enjoy it. 😁 “You said it was a BBQ!”

  26. LeCarrr Avatar

    Aw I bet that 1) you only saw a sampling of people and there were others there on your level; and 2) some guests saw you from afar and were like “who IS that chick” (in the best way ever, coolest girl at the party kind of way) and were disappointed when you skipped immediately!!

  27. muzik4machines Avatar

    Probably dodged a bullet, douche bags who go to pool parties and wear anything but a swimsuit probably listen to garbage music and talk about dumb shit like crypto, you are better off not being there

  28. kmo428 Avatar

    I’m so old that I don’t know what any of this means