Older men (40+), what are things you commonly see the younger men on this sub being confidently wrong about?
Older men (40+), what are things you commonly see the younger men on this sub being confidently wrong about?
r/AskMen
Older men (40+), what are things you commonly see the younger men on this sub being confidently wrong about?
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Women.
And it’s not just the younger men.
how much time you got buddy
Probably that they’re so unattractive that nobody would ever date them.
Like guys, I get it, early 20’s isn’t great for dating, but you have so much time to work out how to present yourself, be sociably likeable and in general look good enough to date.
I didn’t work it out until I was in my late 20’s and it’s been smooth sailing since then. Just give yourself time to work things out.
Using pride in decision making. This worlds going to continuously humble you.
Men and women thinking social media is chapter and verse, all that matters and real life. Some of the shite stuff that gets regurgitated here is just staggering.
Residential construction bids and estimations.
A lot of guys underestimate the value of their work
How much a 19F wants to see their dick
Money. I keep hearing, “I don’t have money to invest, I’m only 22,” or my favorite: “I ain’t gonna live that long.”
It’s not about how much. It’s about starting. Learn how to open a Fidelity or Vanguard account. Set up automatic drafts. Understand what FZROX and VTSAX are. Learn about capital gains, compound interest, and the exponential function. Build the habit. Build the discipline. Start with just a dollar and raise it over time.
Warren Buffett didn’t get rich because he’s a genius. He got rich because he started early. The decades between age 10 and 40 did more for his wealth than anything he did later. One dollar invested at 18 can be worth 60 by retirement.
Meanwhile, I see guys flexing their trucks and sports cars while the payments eat most of their paycheck. Bros do the opposite. Live cheap when you’re young and you can be rich by 35. I promise.
Don’t fall into automotive or credit card debt. Getting drunk with good friends in your hometown is way better than stumbling around Ibiza with strangers and coming home to 10 grand on a Capital One card charging 25 percent interest. Your real life starts in your 30s. You could walk into it with a couple hundred grand in cash, without giving up much. You’ll be smarter, wiser, and maybe have someone you trust to share it with.
Deluding themselves about porn addiction then wondering why they “cant” get laid
Loneliness. It’s not just about getting your dick wet; it’s about having people (plural) to reach out to on your worst day, people who you love and support on theirs, and people you want to hang out with on your best day. Your life partner (assuming you find one) can’t do all that work. You need friends too.
The reason why they can’t get a relationship.
Thinking the dumb stuff they are doing now won’t hurt their back later on.
Hair styles
Just how far confidence (without arrogance), having a sense of humour/wit and being well groomed will get you.
I’ve seen guys who shouldn’t be in certain situations/positions/relationships get there by just having the 3 aforementioned traits and some luck. It’s astonishing what you can be capable of achieving
Other people’s experiences.
How much can be achieved in 1 year vs 10 years.
Wanting to accept current state as in3vitable and permanent instead of trying to do the hard stuff that could actually make a difference.
The obvious answer is their bilious takes on women, but i don’t think that’s even age specific at this point. Plenty of grown ass men in this sub talking like everything they learned about women they learned from the Chinless Fuckwad and his cohort.
Everything.
Politics, women, economics, themselves.
Reddit is a mental health crisis parading as an anonymous chat room.
That Saying you’re an Alpha… makes you an Alpha. They will always be a Beta.
Relationships.
Women.
What women want. Like my brothers, women change their mind 100x a day. Best you can do is be the best version of yourself, take your licks, and hope it works out. If she approves of you and your actions 51% of the time you’re probably winning even if you don’t know it or believe it. One thing I’ve learned is that if they seem happy, then you’re probably good. And if they’re not you best plan an exit strategy. Hell hath no fury.
Not understanding what real effort is.
The prevalence of all that red-pill, black-pill, misogynistic, MGTOW, ultra-machismo, dude-bro manosphere bullshit is quite alarming.
I’ve seen a major rise in this horrific worldview over the years. Men aren’t doing themselves any favors by buying into this garbage.
I’m a 46 year old father of two. If that matters.
Plus the general rise in conservatism as the pendulum swings back to the right. It’s not the way we should be moving.
That life is a zero sum game. Partnerships are built around mutual benefit and elevation.
Health, you won’t always be strong and tough. When life hits you, you’ll either be a totally different person mentally, emotionally or physically, or you’re dead in a blink of the eye
Taking rejection personally. “Its possible to do everything right and still fail.”
A lot of young guys are confidently insecure in themselves! They seem to have this weird view that there are timelines for milestones and stress themselves about staying in lane. It’s ok to not have been in a serious relationship by your late 20s. Plenty of us weren’t. It’s ok to not be sure about the path you want to choose.
That “Communication” and/or “Therapy” are the only answers you need for most everything
That they think their life is nearly over at 25 years old because they can’t get dates or don’t have a girlfriend.
One thing younger men often get confidently wrong is thinking that women are obsessed with looks and six-packs. In the real world, especially as people get older, most women prioritize STABILITY, emotional reliability, and a sense of security far more than physical appearance. It takes time, and usually some real-life experience, for young men to transition from the Tinder-driven mindset to understanding what truly matters in long-term relationships.
95% of women are not playing games with you unless you think survival is a game.
They aren’t fucking 6’4″ Chad’s while making you jump through hoops. Other dudes are getting play by providing a safe atmosphere and making her feel comfortable. If she doesn’t feel safe around you, that it a you problem that needs fixing. Nothing on her end needs to change.
She doesn’t know you, if your going to stalk her, hit her or whatever. You know you, but she does not, and she’s trying to make it home safe at the end of the night. So she will take whatever steps she deems necessary and you don’t really have a right to weigh in on it. If it’s too much for you, move on. You aren’t compatible, and she isn’t playing games.
That you can find solutions or answers to your problems, particularly interpersonal problems, from the internet. Everyone’s situation is unique and each person is unique. Nobody no reddit can tell you what to do about a fight with your girlfriend. And taking advice from someone that doesn’t know your specific situation is as likely to lead to more problems as to solve them.
No sense of responsibility when it comes to getting someone pregnant.
Alpha male energy. There’s a huge difference between being a leader and just being a cunt.
Getting muscles is the key to getting more women 🤦🏻♂️
How much people think they actually know for a fact instead of being open-minded to new ideas.
I stopped doubling down on many of my convictions when I got older and let my ego take a jab. It’s perfectly fine, I survived, and it’s made me more peaceful, successful, and likable.
Don’t listen to us too much, we’re the men who left you the world in this state.
The big thing young fellows seem to get wrong is assuming they don’t have agency. You aren’t helpless. You aren’t penned in. You live in a world that has some pluses. Rapid access to information and more global connectivity.
It’s your time now boys, get out there in the world and find the part of it that is for you.
There are so much black and white thinking that comes from younger people here. A “Correct way” to live / be a man / meet women / etc.
Nothing, and I do mean Nothing, works for everyone. And no strategy fails for everybody. Humans are such a weird mush of abilities, personality disorders, and life stories, that absolutely nothing is one-size-fits-all.
So often I see advice followed by “I tried that and it didn’t work for me” that is met with “then you’re doing it wrong”. Not necessarily true. Everybody’s story is different, everybody’s measurement for success is different, everybody’s starting point is different. There’s no guaranteed path to victory and toning down the absolute confidence you provide in your solutions would go a long way. As would accepting that other people who “Did it wrong” still found a happy ending that works for their life.
Two things:
Mind reading. Someone will ask a question about some interaction they are having, and there will always be responses here saying what the third party’s motives/intentions are. But in the great majority of cases, we really don’t know.
“Men are simple creatures.” Humans are complex. That’s a fact of life. For some, life is a little easier when they keep things on simple terms. But that’s a matter of pragmatics rather than nature.
“Working on yourself” to be more attractive to women doesn’t just mean going to the gym. If you are ignorant, uninteresting, pessimistic, etc. it doesn’t matter how jacked you get. You’ll just be a jacked asshole.
Guys see a pudgy middle-aged guy with a hot wife and think he must be rich. Maybe he just makes her laugh, feel safe, etc.
“The sky is falling.”
I mean yeah man, I get it, shit is messed up right now. But I defy you to point to a time in history when it wasn’t. When I was a kid (1980s), the Soviet Union was going to nuke us into oblivion, if acid rain and AIDS didn’t do us all in first. My young adulthood brought the dotcom crash and then the great recession, while I was busy trying to raise a family.
My folks had the Cuban Missile crisis and race riots and the National Guard shooting college students. Their folks had the great depression, and after that everyone thought that FDR’s aggressive “anti-American socialist agenda” was going to be the end of the country. There was McCarthy, and there was the Civil War, and…I’ll stop before I write a Billy Joel song.
Point is, things have been on fire since, well, always. That’s not to say shit’s not bad now. It totally is. But today’s young men seem to be living under the delusion that previous generations had a walk in the park, and no one can possibly understand how hard it is for them.
The truth is, young brothers, that the world is exactly as fucked as it has always been. Just in super fun new ways.
Good luck.
How hard it allegedly is to be a man.
Every week I see guys around here whining about how it’s so hard to be a man and how we have it worse than women.
When you grow up and gain some perspective, learn some emotional intelligence, and unlearn some of the toxic things society has shoved down our throats our entire lives, you realize that we have it a lot easier than women.
This sentiment: If you are lonely and get no attention from women, the way to go about it spend a shit to ton of time at the gym.
The grouping of X, Y, Z.
Nobody fits in a package. All people are all over the place. Disliking some group for some slight perceived is going to burn opportunities you didn’t even know you had.
Ah fuck, im an older man.
Hell of a way to find out.