Cry together. Especially since both my husband and I were raised in emotionally stunted homes. Like, I am more comfortable walking around him nekkid than I am crying in front of him. The feeling is mutual, and we we both get anxious when others cry around us.
And it’s 100%, not him, I was just shamed for crying growing up (my Boomer/Gen X parents liked to remind me that they would happily give me something to cry about)
Years ago, we watched 13 Reasons (well, I did, but he would get jealous grossed here and there haha) and we both talked about how we both had depression and dealt with things alone I disclosed that I even had a plan at 15. We just held each other and cried. I have never felt closer to my husband than I did in that moment.
Im even getting whelled up typing that out. FACK, I love that man so much 😭😭
Have a child. Support one another through the death of a parent or sibling. Support each other through some sort of existential calamity; in our case it was one of us becoming disabled.
Give them a facial (not a massage because you know), talking softly when you need to speak at all, whatever relaxing music they like is on. Massage scalp, ears, neck, and the tops of their shoulders. Just relax and think about how this face in your hands belongs to the person you care for deeply.
Grief. Losing someone, and being there for one another. Getting though the angry spots, the senseless isolation, ugly crying. You see a person’s true colors during this time.
Terror. Living though anything from a mugging to a Ferris Wheel ride, if you’re both petrified by heights. People are open books when they’re scared for their lives.
Hopelessness. Going through homelessness together, intense poverty, or just both living in a place where justice has been irrevocably corrupted. Where there’s no hope, we find it in one another.
Hard feelings from situations that we have no control over can lead to deep connections, or to the severing of those connections.
Sharing a bed for sure! I deeply agree w the idea that a person can’t fall asleep unless they feel safe and secure. Trusting that your partner won’t be weird or chaotic, that your sleep styles are compatible… yeah that’s a big deal! Which is why, when my friend* stayed over, I was so glad he was able to get some real rest— he deals w insomnia too. So I think that was a sign that he thought our vibe was healthy. 🥹
Sharing a meal. Cooking together. Feeding each other.
Staying up late, taking muscle relaxers, drinking beer, and spilling your guts. Making each other think. I realize this is a super specific situation but it did the trick for me.
Have children. We just had our first and I can say without a doubt that it has made us so much stronger and closer and bonded. Also I wouldn’t do that with a friend lmfao
Cooking as true partners in the kitchen, not one cook and one helper. Riffing off of each other to make the meal better. Being truly in sync that way is so sexy and intimate. It’s like you’re both thinking with the same brain. And the meal is so fantastic at the end – climax!
I recently listen to one of my favorite albums from start to finish with my partner. He listen and even replayed the song I told him was my favorite. It felt soooooo intimate. Loved it.
My husband took care of me through several hospitalizations for diverticulitis and eventually surgery a few years ago.
I have been taking care of him for almost a year now as he has fought (and beat!) a lymphoma brain tumor. His 6 month check up (today!) after a stem cell transplant went beautifully.
Our love has found levels I didn’t know existed as we’ve navigated these things together ❤️.
My family were never really great with talking about feelings and opening up. So it makes me feel very vulnerable when I do open up.
I have had a lot of deep conversations with my partner over the last 13 years together, and I think that’s what makes us so close and makes us grow together.
When me and my now-husband were broken up, he found out his father wasn’t his biological dad. I was the first person he called. I talked him down and then when he set up the first meeting with his bio-dad, he asked me to come along.
Make steaks at 3 am and dance with them in the kitchen followed by a bubble bath together, falling asleep upon one another, waking up to their kiss on your shoulder
There is a moment when we’re talking and we both laugh at something together. It almost feels like we jumped on a slide and rode it down, holding hands. It feels like our energies reach out to one another, and they dance in harmony. That moment for me will always be the most soul affirming.
To be so comfortable around someone, no judgment, just love and affection.
I only wish everyone could experience that in their lifetime.
Break up due to alcoholism. Get tentatively, cautiously back together post rehab. Have the hardest year of each other’s lives for countless assaulting reasons. Still love each other at the end of it.
The deepest thing would be..when throwing a party at your house you both actually help clean, decorate or even chop up the meat for the cooter board instead of choosing that specific day and an hour before company shows up to clean the gutters! No one is looking at the fckn gutters!
Don’t recommend; but losing a child brought me and my partner so close. There was no one on earth that felt the same way him and I did, or fully understood our grief and our feelings.
Communication, esp topics we both don’t want to address but know it’s healthier when we do. And after, taking accountability and developing plans based on the topics discussed.
Comments
Communicate
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A deep conversation about how being w the other person makes you feel and what you wish for the future together
Show them a vulnerable side of yours that neither the world nor you knew existed
Be vulnerable and have hard conversations about the relationship.
Cry together. Especially since both my husband and I were raised in emotionally stunted homes. Like, I am more comfortable walking around him nekkid than I am crying in front of him. The feeling is mutual, and we we both get anxious when others cry around us.
And it’s 100%, not him, I was just shamed for crying growing up (my Boomer/Gen X parents liked to remind me that they would happily give me something to cry about)
Years ago, we watched 13 Reasons (well, I did, but he would get jealous grossed here and there haha) and we both talked about how we both had depression and dealt with things alone I disclosed that I even had a plan at 15. We just held each other and cried. I have never felt closer to my husband than I did in that moment.
Im even getting whelled up typing that out. FACK, I love that man so much 😭😭
Commit.
Have a deep, thought provoking conversation. Literally doing this is why we fell in love.
Be there together when your pet is euthanized.
Banter, sharing a sense of humour, being able to talk about anything and not be misunderstood.
Take responsibility. Say sorry. That’s it, please.
Have a child. Support one another through the death of a parent or sibling. Support each other through some sort of existential calamity; in our case it was one of us becoming disabled.
Give them a facial (not a massage because you know), talking softly when you need to speak at all, whatever relaxing music they like is on. Massage scalp, ears, neck, and the tops of their shoulders. Just relax and think about how this face in your hands belongs to the person you care for deeply.
Deal with your mother in law as a united front
have norovirus together. those who know KNOW
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Fold fitted sheets. If your relationship can survive that ordeal, it can survive anything.
Laughing together. My wife and I laugh so much that our stomachs hurt.
MDMA
Singing is pretty great with a partner.. in most cases. Some people just can’t sing tho.
Hard feelings.
Grief. Losing someone, and being there for one another. Getting though the angry spots, the senseless isolation, ugly crying. You see a person’s true colors during this time.
Terror. Living though anything from a mugging to a Ferris Wheel ride, if you’re both petrified by heights. People are open books when they’re scared for their lives.
Hopelessness. Going through homelessness together, intense poverty, or just both living in a place where justice has been irrevocably corrupted. Where there’s no hope, we find it in one another.
Hard feelings from situations that we have no control over can lead to deep connections, or to the severing of those connections.
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Look deep into each other eyes
Sharing a bed for sure! I deeply agree w the idea that a person can’t fall asleep unless they feel safe and secure. Trusting that your partner won’t be weird or chaotic, that your sleep styles are compatible… yeah that’s a big deal! Which is why, when my friend* stayed over, I was so glad he was able to get some real rest— he deals w insomnia too. So I think that was a sign that he thought our vibe was healthy. 🥹
Sharing a meal. Cooking together. Feeding each other.
Staying up late, taking muscle relaxers, drinking beer, and spilling your guts. Making each other think. I realize this is a super specific situation but it did the trick for me.
Going through something traumatic together and coming out on top better than you were before
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Deep sea diving is deep.
Talk about faith, beliefs and values… may or may in the context of some life incident.
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Being together during the birthing process.
Have children. We just had our first and I can say without a doubt that it has made us so much stronger and closer and bonded. Also I wouldn’t do that with a friend lmfao
Cooking as true partners in the kitchen, not one cook and one helper. Riffing off of each other to make the meal better. Being truly in sync that way is so sexy and intimate. It’s like you’re both thinking with the same brain. And the meal is so fantastic at the end – climax!
Double suicide.
Having children together.
Listen
Watch trash television and judge people and in turn be thankful you’re not a hot mess of a relationship
I recently listen to one of my favorite albums from start to finish with my partner. He listen and even replayed the song I told him was my favorite. It felt soooooo intimate. Loved it.
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Be a caregiver for the other.
My husband took care of me through several hospitalizations for diverticulitis and eventually surgery a few years ago.
I have been taking care of him for almost a year now as he has fought (and beat!) a lymphoma brain tumor. His 6 month check up (today!) after a stem cell transplant went beautifully.
Our love has found levels I didn’t know existed as we’ve navigated these things together ❤️.
Talking about emotions.
My family were never really great with talking about feelings and opening up. So it makes me feel very vulnerable when I do open up.
I have had a lot of deep conversations with my partner over the last 13 years together, and I think that’s what makes us so close and makes us grow together.
Talking, communicating, eye contact
If you have a tiny injury but its bleeding (like your finger) then they suck on it to stop the blood flow.
If you have a tiny injury but its bleeding (like your finger) then they suck on it to stop the blood flow.
Probably pray together
Raise a child
Welcome a child into the world together.
Completely support each other – judgement-free
Overwatch 2
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Get food poisoning together should be high on that list. Or even just significantly ill. It’s a different kind of bond and support.
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Shave his head 🪒
When me and my now-husband were broken up, he found out his father wasn’t his biological dad. I was the first person he called. I talked him down and then when he set up the first meeting with his bio-dad, he asked me to come along.
Being honest about your thoughts. Any of them.
Acid
Display “weakness” and not regret later
Hold you, cry together, support you through major life changes or deaths of loved ones.
See you, in all the good and bad, and still love you, commitment, long term commitment and growth together.
Drowning in eyes, deeper than any touch.
Eye gazing
Say goodbye to a parent
Candy flip and listen to some deep ass concept album in a field out in the woods.
Sex can go fuck itself, if I could experience that again.
Writing your wills
Make steaks at 3 am and dance with them in the kitchen followed by a bubble bath together, falling asleep upon one another, waking up to their kiss on your shoulder
Scuba dive
Talk about feelings and boundaries and life etc
There is a moment when we’re talking and we both laugh at something together. It almost feels like we jumped on a slide and rode it down, holding hands. It feels like our energies reach out to one another, and they dance in harmony. That moment for me will always be the most soul affirming.
To be so comfortable around someone, no judgment, just love and affection.
I only wish everyone could experience that in their lifetime.
The deepest thing a couple can do is never give up on one another
Scuba diving
Break up due to alcoholism. Get tentatively, cautiously back together post rehab. Have the hardest year of each other’s lives for countless assaulting reasons. Still love each other at the end of it.
Sit with each other and be comfortable with the silence.
Become partners in crime
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Have geniune, open and vulnerable conversations.
ETA: sex isnt even that big of a deal. Its just a thing people do with their bodies.
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Fight the power together
Literal y anything that your partner cares about.
Raise a child
Probably scuba diving
Cuddle, snuggle, make out like we’re teenagers!!!
The deepest thing would be..when throwing a party at your house you both actually help clean, decorate or even chop up the meat for the cooter board instead of choosing that specific day and an hour before company shows up to clean the gutters! No one is looking at the fckn gutters!
Raise children
Walk the path of aging parents together.
Don’t recommend; but losing a child brought me and my partner so close. There was no one on earth that felt the same way him and I did, or fully understood our grief and our feelings.
Feeling truly seen and safe while being emotionally vulnerable
Communication, esp topics we both don’t want to address but know it’s healthier when we do. And after, taking accountability and developing plans based on the topics discussed.