People have different perspectives on gender norms and expressions when it comes to men and what it means to be a man. Some say masculinity is about energy, while others think it’s moreso about behaviour. While others believe sexuality affects someone’s degree of masculinity. I want to hear how other men define what masculinity means to them and their opinions on it as a whole.
What is masculinity to you?
r/AskMen
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Taking care of your family in every way.
Protection, not domination.
Being as swift as the coursing river
Really couldn’t care less about this .
Suffering in silence
I cant possibly summarize everything it means to me in one comment, but some key features:
Providing. Gaining external resources and bringing them into my home to be used by my family to better our quality of life.
Protection. Being the “frontline” so-to-speak if any danger arises, specifically in regards to my family.
Physical acts of kindness. Like walking an old lady across the road, opening doors, helping fix things, reaching high up places. Masculine kindness in my head tends to be more about doing physical things and using my body to benefit others.
A certain level of childlike hedonism with dumb things. Like throwing a large rock into a pond to make a large splash. Or finding a cool looking stick and carrying it home. Breaking the thin layer of ice on a frozen lake with a rock.
Certain traditions like sitting around a campfire and talking about nothing with other men.
I have never in my life cared about masculinity. If I want to do something I do it, I don’t really care how it’s perceived by the collective male gender.
Whatever man. Just try to live a virtuous life. Gender doesn’t matter.
Being confident and comfortable enough in oneself to be able to achieve whatever gets thrown at you.
Reliability. I think if you’re someone anyone can depend on, you are very masculine in a good way.
I don’t think about it at all.
It makes me think of the stereotypical things like muscles, body hair, and sportsball. I really couldn’t care less about any of that though.
My dad always said that being a man is about handling your responsibilities. So to me, it’s making sure that everyone around me is taken care of, making sure they know they’re cared for and supported, making sure they feel safe
Leveraging your skills and social/physical advantages to protect others.
To me it’s about using my strengths to protect, comfort and nurture those I love.
Live and act with honor, care for the ones you love, protect the weak, be honest and take shit from Noone!
Basically the minimum to get up, look in the mirror and respect yourself!
It’s a social construct that varies across time and place, with some aspects being influenced by both cultural and biological factors. While often linked to physical strength, aggression, and emotional restraint, masculinity is a diverse concept with various interpretations and expressions.
Jesus Christ
Optimus Prime
Spider-Man
Super Man
If you don’t understand why these 4 are the peak of masculinity and good role models then you are part of the problem
This that one “femboy” account that keeps coming by.
Masculinity is strength of character and resolve in service of others. It is defined by duty, sacrifice, and endurance. It is demonstrated by shouldering responsibility, protecting, providing, and leading with purpose and moral clarity. It reaches its fullest expression in the archetype of the father.
A script they gave you about how you have to behave, what should you love and hate. A load of bollocks.
Meaningless, every male has their own
Living life on my own terms, looking after the people around me, following my own moral code.
Nothing inherently masculine about that really.
Kinning Duke Nukem while working out
Being able to shit, shower and shave in 16 1/2 minutes.
To be honest, I virtually never think about definitions of masculinity or femininity. They mean very little to me. Some people definitely have strong connections though and constantly analyze themselves with respect to them. But for me personally, being a guy is just an attribute like having brown hair is an attribute. Is it something? Sure. But does it really mean much? No.
I’d say it’s just owning who you are, all the messy parts included. It’s showing up, being responsible for your shit, and not running from the hard stuff. No tough acts or hiding what hurts.
Raising your children
I don’t put much stock into it. I’m me because I’m me, not some arbitrary rules some jackasses from a long time ago dreamt up. I don’t care how other people perceive me, that’s their problem not mine.
Having balls both literally and metaphorically.
It’s anything a man does. Some guys repair transmissions and other guys bake cakes. The idea is to be a good man no matter how you’re wired.
Having a big beard, lifting weights, getting tattoos. Bonus points for wearing shorts in the winter so people can see you have a tattoo on your leg as well.
Making your own path without caring about the judgement of others
What is called today as “toxic masculinity”
It means you are the one who checks the noise in the middle of the night.
Being a great husband and caring father.
Emotionally mature and chivalrous.
A real man does whatever the fuck he wants and doesn’t require approval from others to be happy. A real man is comfortable with who he is and while he may accommodate others he doesn’t completely change who he is for someone else. A real man handles his business, accepts responsibility, and doesn’t blame others for his own mistakes.
It’s a made-up term. It doesn’t really mean anything to me, at least. In a relationship, you simply need to care for the other person and show respect at all times. Someone said “protection not domination”, but the other gender can also be protective of you, it doesn’t have to be physical all the time.
Amen
You know the scene where Odin explains to Thor why a Hammer is a great Weapon for a King? What he describes about the Hammer, is how I view Masculinity or me being a Man. A shorter Version would be the Spiderman QUote from Uncle Ben:”With great power comes great responsibility!”
Strength, Dedication, Reliability but also the Responsibility to be a Protector and not a Tyrant.
Cutting down trees with a solid erection.
Denying obvious injury.
“I’m fine.”
Stoicism. Focus on what you can control. Reacting to situations accordingly. Not being completely devoid of emotion but being able to regulate how you react to situations and keep a calm level head and show emotion when appropriate. Be physically and mentally strong. Be ambitious and provide for loved ones. Encourage others to be the best versions of themselves they can be without being a bully. But as with every life style you need balance, along with stoicism you need to recognise when you need help.
Healing without bleeding on others even if that means isolation. Forgoing quick dopamine releases and tracking growth. Searching inward to find answers and realising that most people are echo chambers. To me, forget masculinity, that is almost godlike.
If you have to heal from something, forget about looking after family. Forget chasing things that will give fleeting feelings of success. Look after yourself first and don’t feel selfish for it. Thats masculinity, conquering the hard part first so that it doesn’t rear it’s ugly head in every thing you do.
Doing the right thing, even when it’s hard
It’s finding a good balance and control of set traits that are either expected of men in our society or that we naturally possess through hormones, physical traits, etc. Elevated testosterone levels are a blessing but when not controlled and cared for are a curse. So things like being
Confident not arrogant.
Strong / Physical but not abusive.
Aggressive but not hostile or controlling.
Assertive but not domineering.
Generous but not a sucker.
Not seeking approval from others of your masculinity.
If you feel masculine, great. But bragging about it as if you want others to agree that you’re some kind of “Alpha” is just pathetic and childish, only boys call themselves “Alpha”…
Atticus ftw
Being able to do things socially interpreted as “feminine” or emasculating without feeling any different about yourself or your masculinity.
All these comments are bullshit, cope, and just pc answers people want to hear.
Masculinity in peoples perception isn’t logical or in the front of your thoughts. It’s subconscious, and it’s all about the presence of someone.
The bigger impact you have on your social setting, be it physical size, charisma, and/or power, is directly related to how masculine you’re perceived.
Being someone safe for people, not a threat
Masculinity to me is being clearheaded, confident and self aware enough to decide on your own what masculinity is.
A.k.a, real men don’t give a fuck whether or not they’re a “real man”
Taking care of my family.
I think it’s something that unless you’re a man you’ll never understand it. It’s something deep in our bones that sometimes gets called toxic. The thing with masculinity is we don’t know what it is or how to define it, but when it’s time for us to be masculine we know.
One of the best ways to look at it honestly kind of boils down to the Teddy Roosevelt quote.
You should aspire to not be the loudest in the room, you should never be talking about how “alpha” you are. Only insecure people would do anything of the sort.
You should be a presence/person people feel comfortable and safe around.