My girlfriend is 4 months pregnant, throughout the relationship (1 year) she gets upset when I see my friends, resorting to either blocking me on social media or breaking up with me.
Her falling pregnant was an accident but we’ve decided to go ahead and have the baby, we’re both very excited.
I work week on week off and my week off I’ll make sure I take her out to lunch or dinner at least once, I spend 90% of my time with her. I only want to catch up with my mates for maybe a quick beer once or twice a week usually to watch a football game and that’s it.
When I try and leave the house she either gets angry at me for going or starts crying and says I’m prioritising my friends over her.
I’ve sat down with her and explained that she is the most important person in my life but I’m still allowed to see my friends.
Recently my mum called me and said my twin sister had to check herself into a mental hospital and the only person she wants to see is me because of how close we are. My girlfriend and I have been fighting and during a fight she brought up how my real father left because he knew I was a sociopath, this was after me going to see my friends for a drink, after being accused of other things by her I shut down and said we’ll talk in the morning please, she ended up packing up and leaving at 3am then proceeded to block me and not tell me where she is.
I finally was able to get in contact with her and suggested therapy together which she agreed to then I had to tell her I have to fly 6 hours across the country to see my twin sister
She is now telling me I don’t care about her that I care more for my sister than her. That she needs help because she feels she’s going to end up in a hospital.
I explained I can be there for her and my sister and even suggested she can come with me.
This was met with I’d rather fly to see my sister than her.
What is going on?
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Your girlfriend is psycho and manipulative. That’s what’s going on. I mean, we could be nice and call it insecure attachment or whatever, but it’s not going to work. Good luck co-parenting with this.
>she gets upset when I see my friends, resorting to either blocking me on social media or breaking up with me.
Well, that’s toxic.
>When I try and leave the house she either gets angry at me for going or starts crying and says I’m prioritising my friends over her.
Toxic
> she brought up how my real father left because he knew I was a sociopath
Toxic
>she ended up packing up and leaving at 3am then proceeded to block me and not tell me where she is.
Toxic
You’re in a toxic relationship and should have left long ago. And yes, she’s controlling since that was your question.
She will never stop trying to isolate you from everyone. For the love of god, do not marry this creature. Save money for the inevitable custody battle.
Your girlfriend sounds VERY insecure, controlling, and manipulative. You’ve got to sit her down and have an honest conversation that if she continues there will be no relationship. Personally I think she needs counseling to work on her issues before there’s couple counseling.
Her calling you a sociopath was totally uncalled for. She is unhinged. I’m sorry but you need to work on a coparenting plan and let her go. She sounds like Fatal Attraction, keep bunnies away from her.
I feel like she planned getting pregnant…
Yes she’s being extremely controlling! This will only get worse when the baby is born. She wants to see you only dependent on her for everything. You need to stop this in it tracks. You cannot cease communication with your family and friends to appease her. You’ve only known her for a short period of time. She gets pregnant 6 months into your new relationship. She baby trapped you and is now using emotional manipulation to get you to do what she wants. Honestly you need to break up and find a way to co parent your child. Seriously, this is not going to end well.
I can’t believe you are going to have a child in this toxic relationship 🫠🤦♀️
Wowzaaaa man I’m sorry. You have a very toxic person on your hands. If she was like this before getting pregnant then hormones cant be an excuse. She is trying to isolate you and control you with fear, by disappearing and also being horribly abusive with the dad comments.
She shouldn’t be able to be a mom in her stage of self awareness, but she is and that’s unfortunate for the little sweet human who will hope for stability and safety.
Again I’m sorry
Go see your sister
Oof. Get a paternity test and hope it isn’t your baby. Let her leave and cry and get a paternity test once the baby is born and co parent the nest you can. This woman is 32 and acts like a toddler when she doesn’t get her way.
Tell your girlfriend to grow the fuck up. Tell her that you’re not doing this bullshit. Not now and not in the future and it doesn’t matter if she’s pregnant, or the mother of your child. You’re seeing your friends. You’re seeing your family. You don’t give a shit if she’s mad about it and if she thinks you’re going to have a relationship with someone who plays this shitty, toxic game, she’s incorrect. Honestly, she sounds terrible.
Please use her unstable behavior as reason for why you need full custody of this child.
This is flat out abuse. Cutting you off from friends and family, calling you a sociopath, telling you that your childhood trauma is your fault, blocking you and disappearing, all forms of abuse. Sorry you have to raise a child with someone like that but the relationship most likely won’t get better and you’ll most likely have to end up learning to co-parent separately.
Let the control freak leave, stop allowing these immature little games, contact a lawyer about getting custody of the baby because she is not stable.
so many red flags and I only read the first couple sentences.
This sounds terrible. The pregnancy complicates things, I really hope couples counselling helps sort out her controlling and abusive behaviours. Alternately, way easier said than done, you may want to just leave now and split parenting.
This is so wildly toxic.
She’s just getting started trying to control you and make you dependent on her. She’s already trying to isolate you from friends and family. I get you guys r having a baby – but def do not live or get married to her. 🚩
She’s toxic and controlling, she’s manipulating you and is emotionally abusive and my first thought was that she baby trapped you on purpose.
Please look after yourself and go see your sister.
Get a paternity test and then coparent if it is yours.
Don’t talk in person, text only for receipts and if your in a one party state record in person talks if you can’t avoid it. Keep someone with you as a witness.
Good luck.
Updateme
Omgosh. Run. With a smile on your face. This is not normal behavior. I don’t know how you “fall” pregnant- my soul cringes every time I hear it. I picture a girl falling down & standing up in shock because she’s now pregnant lol. But that’s beside the point. Your gf is toxic as can be. Like every aspect of your relationship. And now you guys are bringing a baby into this?? It would be better for the baby if it didn’t grow up in this toxic environment. Your twin is in crisis- she doesn’t care- she doesn’t want you to see her. Vile. You have an argument & she weaponized your dad’s leaving- blaming you & belittling you. Vile. Toxic. Your friends? What friends? You aren’t allowed to have any. Vile. Toxic. Vile. You would have to be insane to think this is healthy or wise.
Well you certainly don’t have a winner in this one. It will get worse when the baby comes-much much worse. Consider breaking up and getting a child support and visitation agreement in place because this is not a sustainable relationship. I hope your sister is doing better.
Welcome to the entirety of your future life.
I couldn’t read past her getting upset over you having friends and breaking up with you.
May God have mercy on your unborn child, its mother is batshit crazy.
Wow, she has some issues. Your life will be a miserable one if you let her control you like this. Each person in a marriage or dating relationship should have their own hobbies and friends. Being together 24/7 would get old pretty fast for me personally. I don’t appreciate anyone telling me what I can and cannot do. Was she this way before the pregnancy? I’m afraid you are in for many stressful years here.