I recently ended a 4 year (mostly long distance) relationship for myself and because of admiration of my friend. My career will not allow me to settle down anytime soon and frankly I don’t want to, so I made what I believed to be the mature decision. During that same time while I was navigating what needed to be done in my relationship, I made a very good friend, well call her Ella. Ella is probably the most badass teenager you’ll ever meet. She and I are both helicopter pilots and we both have very similar goals. We both want to see the world through our career, go on big adventures, and experience new things. Honestly our chemistry is unmatched and I’ve never flirted so hard and felt so much fun with anyone. We even have been on a road trip and drove through the night together and we definitely formed a bond. One that stuck with me and made me fall in love.
Here is the kicker, Ella is in a relationship. She is in love with her bf who we’ll call Cole. Cole is several years older than her (7yrs) and he is a flight instructor. She talks about him all dreamy like but still I think she knows it won’t work when he moves in the very near future for a new job.
What I need to know is should I let this all go? Or should I pursue it? I’m on a 3-5 month timeline before I need to start searching for jobs too. I feel quite conflicted because I know what I’m feeling is real, but she either doesn’t feel it or she’s protecting her own feelings by not showing it. What do I do?
TLDR: ended a relationship and made a new friend who I’m slowly falling in love with. She has a boyfriend and we’re both helicopter pilots so it’s messy.
Comments
Leave it be. If it happens it happens. If she’s in a committed relationship you’d be wrong to break
them up no matter what your view is.
I would consider it a red flag that she’s flirting with you while she has a boyfriend. But it’s possible she’s just being friendly not flirty and you’re reading too much into it.