As the title says my adult cousin(45M) who we’ll call A, just told me(15F) he liked me and kissed me on the cheek. For some context, A is an electrician and helped wire some lights in mine and my sisters(17F) bedroom. Our bedroom is split into two areas with an s bunk bed being the divider so we needed some lights rewired. My cousin agreed to do it and came over a couple times.
When he first came over he asked me about my braces and I told him how I just got them etc. He then told me ‘but one thing is girls with braces are hot’ and winked at me. A lot of my family is autistic so I just assumed this was a poorly worded compliment meant to try and raise my self esteem. Looking back this should of been when I noticed something was weird.
My parents were away for the weekend so my older sister was taking care of us when he came over to finish installing them. Now I’m relatively small and our house has a lot of wood and supports in the roof so I thought nothing of it when he asked me to come up and help, especially since I had been up there before. In hindsight I realize it was more him wanting to be alone with me. I was wearing a tank top and he had to lie on his back to maneuver. He spent quite a lot of time looking at me but I assumed it was to make sure I was being safe. When we got out and finished connecting the lights he grabbed my shoulders and stared at me. He leaned in and it looked like he was going to kiss me on the lips but opted out last minute and instead kissed my cheek and hugged me. He then whispered about how he liked me even though he shouldn’t and his mum told him he should keep it to himself. Not wanting to be alone with him I called my sister to come look at her new lights and he left soon after.
Now I don’t know what to do. A struggles with various mental health issues and high blood pressure. I worry that telling someone could really badly affect him. Besides I only see him around once a year and even then I rarely speak to him. I don’t want to cause unnecessary drama in the family but I’m stuck. Any advice would be great.
Comments
Who cares about him you need to tell someone
You definitely need to tell the rest of your family asap. It sucks and it’ll probably cause a lot of drama, but that’s pretty sick and unforgiveable. Its possible he tried the same with your sister at one point but she might have kept it to herself, so this might give her a chance to tell her side too if something similar happened.
sometimes you need to put yourself first in these types of situations, this isn’t “unnecessary” drama, this is something that should be addressed. he said it himself he knows it’s wrong and he shouldn’t have told you or put you in that type of situation where you were alone with him knowing the feelings he harbors. if he already told you don’t stay quiet about it, it could escalate if you hold your silence and worst comes to worst.
Who cares what he thinks or feels, he is a grown ass man trying to take advantage of young girls, you need to tell whoever you trust and love in your family
First: Whatever A struggles with is on him. It’s certainly not on you to keep him from the consequences of his actions. He’s a grown adult and expected to be able to stand up for himself, even for his less than admirable actions.
Second: You absolutely need to tell your family. He got you alone this time, ogled you and kissed you. What will he do next time?
Third: are you absolutely sure he installed only the lights? What are the chances he could hide a small camera looking at your bunk bed?