Guy (M29?) with a girlfriend kept holding my (F23) hands, kissed me, then disappeared… now he added me on Instagram??

r/

I’ve been sitting with something for a few months now and would really appreciate some advice or insight from anyone who’s experienced something similar.

A while ago, I started having these very quiet but emotionally charged interactions with someone. We never spoke directly, but we kept running into each other in the same place near the bathrooms and it felt intentional. He would look at me in this way that felt very intense, like the air between us changed. There was a kind of silent chemistry I still don’t fully understand.

Then one day, he held my hand. That was also the moment he mentioned he had a girlfriend. We almost kissed, but didn’t. Still, it felt like we were both aware that something unspoken was happening.

After that, I saw him a few more times. I tried to avoid that space, but I think he wanted to keep running into me. The final time we saw each other, he took both of my hands, looked at my lips like he wanted to say or do something more, hugged me tightly, and kissed me again not on the mouth, but it felt close. Then he disappeared. I haven’t seen him since.

That was about four months ago. More recently, he added me on social media, but hasn’t contacted me. I haven’t reached out either. I believe he’s currently on vacation with his girlfriend, and I don’t want to interfere with anything in his life. I just find myself stuck emotionally, still thinking about those moments and wondering whether they meant anything to him or not.

I’m not looking for judgment, just clarity from people who’ve felt something similar or who’ve been in a confusing situation where something felt real, but unresolved. Would it be a bad idea to reach out to ask what that was all about, just so I can get some closure? Or would it be better to let it go and try to move on quietly?

Any advice or shared experiences would be appreciated.
Thanks for reading.

Comments

  1. D_Mon_Taurus Avatar

    The only person who can give you closure is you.

    Block him. Unless they’re polyamorous—and they’re not because he would have specifically and explicitly made that clear—you’re setting yourself up to get your feelings hurt. If he simply wanted to be friendly, he would have made friendly contact instead of lurking. If he genuinely wanted to be with you romantically, he would have already ended it with his partner.

  2. Express_Way_3794 Avatar

    Just let it go. It wasn’t really anything after all.