I recently had open gallbladder surgery, leaving me with a large incision on my upper right abdomen. Since I’m plus-sized and still healing, I booked two seats on a long-distance bus to ensure I had enough space and wouldn’t be uncomfortable.
When I boarded, I gave the conductor (ticket collector) both tickets and made it clear I paid for two seats. However, later in the trip, the bus picked up a mother and her child as chance passengers. The bus was already full, so the only available seat was the one I had paid for next to me.
The mother tried to sit her child there, but I politely told her I had booked and paid for both seats. She got upset and asked, “Where are we supposed to sit then?” I told her to speak with the conductor. The conductor admitted he forgot I had booked two seats and offered to refund me for one so they could sit. I explained that I booked two seats for medical reasons, but the mother kept insisting, saying her child wouldn’t bother me and that they couldn’t stand the whole trip.
At this point, other passengers started getting involved. One man condescendingly told me they’d cover the cost of my extra seat, so “what’s the problem?” Another sarcastically said I should’ve taken an ambulance instead. The mother and some passengers kept saying, “But there’s a child.” Eventually, another man offered to stand for the rest of the trip so the mother and child could sit, but I felt like I was suddenly cast as the villain in a movie I never auditioned for lol.
Now that I’m home and resting, I keep replaying the situation in my head. Was I really the asshole? I planned ahead, paid for two seats, and had a legitimate medical reason. But the way everyone reacted is making me second-guess myself.
Comments
Absolutely NTA, You literally just got cut open..F em!!
NTA. The situation was entirely the conductors fault. He accepted the extra passengers and then threw you to the wolves. He is the asshole here, not you. I also don’t think the mother and child are asholes, they were victims of the lazy conductor as well.
NTA. You paid for two seats, and you get two seats. Plain and simple.
I would report the driver to the company. This was his fault.
NTA. You planned ahead and paid for both seats. The lack of planning on the mother’s part is not your problem and the conductor “forgetting” is not your problem either. The other passengers need to myob.
NTA. Who gives a damn if I kid an involved or not… you took initiative to give yourself needed room as to not overcrowd anyone else and also for your incision so you weren’t uncomfortable.. they can all kick rocks. You didn’t do anything wrong and glad you still stood your ground despite everyone else pressuring you. People are so entitled it’s nuts.
NTA. You had every right to keep your seat, considering you recently had surgery and needed the space for comfort. It was unacceptable how everyone else reacted, trying to shame you for prioritizing your health when they couldn’t even see things from your perspective
NTA-you paid for two seats so you get two seats.
NTA You told them you booked two seats for medical reasons. The conductor is the one at fault here.
Are you kidding? NTA.
NTA. You paid for your seats & it’s the train company’s fault just like when flights are overbooked. Someone else’s screw up is never your job to correct.
NTA for not giving up the seat, but you should have shown the incision (or bandages) to get them off your case. People get extremely uncomfortable at the sight of medical issues, and they’re the chance passengers who didn’t book tickets ahead of time. Fuck that noise.
Nah you did everithing right..paid for ur seats, planned ahead and had a legit reason. Wild how folks acted like that was ur problem. Do you think they would’ve trusted you the same if it wasnt a mom and kid?
NTA – you thought ahead and booked 2 seats. If i was traveling with my child I would book ahead too, rather than chance a situation where we wouldn’t have a spot. It sucks for everyone involved but the other passengers really should have stayed out if it.
NTA.
Make a complaint to the bus company. Explain what happened and that the drivers mistake caused other passengers to insult you. They should have never been allowed on the bus if it was already booked up.
NTA, don’t let this take space in your head. The real ass hole is the conductor. He didn’t forget. He was hoping to bully you into giving up the seat. Then he allowed the other people to bully you. He should have shut down the crowd, not letting them harass you. File a complaint with the bus company if it will help you deal.
NTA
You prepared. The fault is entirely the conductor’s, who should never have taken them. And should never have tried to deal with this in front of everyone. Report the experience if you can, you should not have had to be embarrassed or treated poorly by other travellers when you were just taking proper precautions given your medical circumstances.
NTA at all—you paid for those seats fair and square for a legit medical reason, and it’s not your fault the conductor screwed up or that the mom didn’t plan ahead, so don’t let their guilt-tripping make you doubt yourself.
Im honestly glad you stood your ground if it was me id definitely cave cuz i have anxiety/people pleasing issues so id def feel awkward about it too. but at the end of the day you had medical reasons, and even if you didnt, you still paid for both seats. Def the conductor’s fault for forgetting about it!
She said her child wouldn’t bother you! That is some BS right there. What if the kid had ended up kicking you on the incision?? Parents with children are so entitled sometimes. You did your due diligence and I would’ve loudly called out the conductor for his behavior!! NTA
NTA why didn’t the mom stand up, give the child HER seat ?
Damn. NTA. You can’t win. People tell plus size people to get 2 seats so they don’t “squish” the other passenger. You got 2 seats as a precaution and being plus size and still got shit. I hope you heal quickly and let this go. You were right.
Info: how recent?
NTA- she’s just another parent with a monumental sense of entitlement who thinks the world should revolve around her spawn.
Other people’s poor planning do not constitute an emergency in your life. You paid for the second seat for medical reasons. NtA
It’s too bad there isn’t a special pass you can get for a medical exemption/accommodation on public transportation, like there is for handicapped parking, or for service animals. You should just be able to flash your special pass and let people stfu.
NTA, you planned in advance and PAID for two seats! You shouldn’t have to give up your seat because of someone else’s mistake!
NTA. The conductor f****d and needed to make it right, not you.
F’em All..
Especially that AH conductor.
Definitely NTAH hope your recovery is going well
NTA. You paid for 2 seats and had a valid reason for not wanting to give one up.
NTA
That’s crappy behaviour from the Conductor and I would probably submit a complaint to the operating company. You should not have to deal with bullying from other passengers because the Conductor didn’t pay attention, especially when you made a point of explaining to him why you’d booked two seats.
NTA and that’s crazy everyone gave you such a hard time.
I do have a question and it’s just pure curiosity. It has no effect on whether you’re the asshole or not because you paid for that seat, it was yours. But you said you were an oversized plus person, was part of your body in that seat? Or was it completely open? I’m just curious how they thought they could sit there and start to sit there since I’m picturing part of your body being in that seat. The nerve of people and their entitlement. It blows my mind.
NTA when they removed my gallbladder there were issues and they had to abort and go in the old fashioned way. I was 23, just discharged from the military, and only 120 pounds. For weeks maybe months I had to have 3 people come to help me out of bed.
Next time someone pressures you to bend over backwards to help their fails of parenthood say this, “I’m sorry I must be forgetting, when did I slip my dick into and knock you up?”
Yes, strangers on a bus think you’re a villian, but did you travel how you wanted and planned for? Fuck them kids
NTA kids need to learn to stand, growing up I was never allowed to sit if an adult needed to sit. Fuck kids people need to stop spoiling them
I almost got attacked by some crazy dude on the bus because a lady with an “EMPTY” stroller comes on, walks up to me and gestures with her finger for me to move. I gestured back with my finger (no not the middle one as tempting as it was) and pointed her to the rest of the empty seats on the bus also empty. She then pointed to the sign above for disabled and elderly and I told her she was neither. Then some dude sitting in the back starts yelling at me those seats are reserved for people with strollers. He looked pretty unhinged so I didn’t want to escalate his anger so I got up and said if you want it, here you go. After a few stops of the crazy guy mumbling curse words under his breath he actually tried to swat at me and run off the bus, thankfully he missed cause I would have had to wash and disinfect my face after that piece of fecal matter touched me. Lol.
I am weirded out that the hospital has let you go, without first making sure you are travel ready. If you are travel ready, then you should not need an extra seat.
If you discharged yourself early from the hospital then, YTA.
I think it’s important to take care of yourself, and you took a preventive act. People in a group are inclined to act as a mob without much thought, jumping to conclusions, and scapegoating/shaming someone on a whim. On the surface your giving up your extra seat seemed to be obvious, but realistically, the most logical and best solution was a guy giving up his seat! The complexity of the situation certainly would lead to your second guessing yourself. The conductor incompetently blew it, and created the drama!!!
People don’t know other people’s personal struggles and problems, which leads to quick judgments. I’m surprised people didn’t want to get physical because of their judgment and misunderstandings. You bought the two seats, and you’re entitled to them. Sometimes a person looks like the bad guy, and people don’t do the “what if i was in their shoes” scarnio. Nta .
I remember when we were little children stood for adults to have the seats,
“You had every right to keep your seat” End of sentence.
Fixed it.
NTA! I’ve had gallbladder surgery with a long incision. Believe me I feel your pain. Please rest and get better soon .
I’m petty as hell but I would’ve lifted up my shirt and showed them my incision.
I’m recovering from surgery. Are you ready to pay my medical bills when you accidentally open my incisions? Cool let’s get that on video.
Just because you have a kid doesn’t mean your entitled to special treatment.
I hope you report the conductor to the company. They actually should compensate you for their mistake and your treatment.
NTA. I would have started taking about things “oozing” and giving graphic details. Then offered to show them. But I’ve also been told I’m not a well person lol
NTA…
I may ask more questions if the mother had offered to switch seats so she was next to you and not the child. That said even then you wouldn’t really be the Ahole. The assholes are the bus company for attempting to milk extra money. It was no accident.
Please file a complaint against the conductor. This was entirely his fault. He could have refunded the woman’s money and had her to get off. If the train was already on the way they he should have figured something out. Doesn’t he have a seat? He should have never let you be harassed.
NTA. Unless the bus had already started moving, the conductor should have asked the woman and her kid to disembark and take another bus.
NTA. This reminds me of when airlines overbook planes. Its easy for passengers to blame each other and scapegoat but this is 100% not your fault.
I have no idea if this story is real (it is about the 15th one about seats I have seen today) but if it is real NTA.
You should have stated clearly – I just had surgery, I do not have the means for any other transportation than this bus. I planned ahead and bought 2 seats to accommodate myself as I was JUST CUT OPEN. Your failure to plan ahead does not make me wrong or the villain. I
NTA- Send a very strongly worded letter about descrimination to the company- not only did the conductor put you in an uncomfortavle position by trying to give up what you paod for but then he allowed others to harass you for yis mistake.
You absolutely are not in the wrong here, everyone else is. The kid could sit on her lap. Or better, on the conductor since he F’d this all up.
Wow you poor thing! To have to endure all that on your ride. I’m so sooo sorry. People can be so horrible. You even explained! And to have someone chime in you should have talked an ambulance! You didn’t need any of that. And I hope you can put this all behind you. 🙏🏼
Good on you to stand your stance.
You’d be NTA if this is real, but this is a fake post for karma.
This is what headphones are for. NTA.
NTA.
The conductor didn’t forget. He made a choice to create an issue he thought he could pass along to the passengers. Good for you for standing your ground.
NTA kid could have sat on mother’s lap.
Are you in America?
Your country leader just reduced support for disabled people, this is a fairly logical resolution. I’m sorry
Everyone complains that people of size must purchase two tickets. And when they do it… they need to surrender the second seat.
NTA
NTA, my answer when someone says “But my chiiilllllldddd” is “I didn’t knock you up, I’m not responsible for your mistakes”
NTA. I mean, I would have shown them the scar and said I couldn’t have anyone kicking or bumping me but I’m 100% ok with grossing other people out.
NTA “I paid for this seat and I am using it” is a complete and appropriate response. Repeat as many times as needed.
Make a complaint about the POOR SERVICE and the fact that you didn’t fuck up but the conductor did.
NTA
As someone with an invisible injury (partially crushed vertebra from a car crash) it can be really frustrating. I know I look like a decently in shape 40 y/o, but there are things I just can’t do or I’ll be in pain for days.
NTA. Absolutely NOT the AH! I can’t imagine getting an accidental elbow in your surgery site!
When you’re fat, people say you should be required to purchase an extra ticket and when you do this happens. The louder public would prefer you to just not exist or if you must exist, to stay at home.
I’ve been incredibly skinny and made myself smaller because of people (not fat people, mind you) invading my space. There is nothing you can do to please people except to let yourself be walked over.
You will never be tah for taking the space you need, much less, you paid for. I’m proud of you for standing your ground, especially as you did NOT need that incision being hit, accident or not. Nta
NTA. Ambulances cost hundreds to thousands of dollars in the US. So telling you just to take an ambulance if you are in the US is absurd.
Medical reasons or not. You paid for two seats. If they overbooked, not your problem. Buying you out is more than someone giving you the price for one ticket back. If someone else wanted to stand, good for them.
There absolutely no way to know that child won’t cause you pain and if it does, there’s nothing you could do about it.
NTA. Not even close.
Even if you didn’t just have major surgery, you still paid for 2 seats. I feel for you, because I’m also tired of strangers’ poor planning messing me up too.
I hope you’re feeling better soon
Nta. They shouldn’t shame you for their errors. If you would’ve been poking out of one seat onto a second one they would’ve been complaining that you should’ve paid for two seats. Can’t win here it seems. 🤦♀️ I hope you have a speedy recovery and feel better soon. I would reach out to the company and try to get a refund anyway for the crude behavior you dealt with
The mom didn’t plan ahead at all, hadn’t book any seats. Maybe she’ll learn something.
I would’ve lifted my shirt to show the incision. Side of gross out for their entitlement.
NTA and screw them. People always want to insert themselves into a situation to look like the hero without knowing all the facts. You don’t owe ANYONE an explanation of why you purchased two seats and the mistake the conductor made was not your problem to fix.
You could have traumatized them both and showed your scar!
NTA. You paid for two seats because you needed them due to a medical condition. The bus company made the mistake by overbooking, not you. It’s unfortunate for the mother and child, but their lack of seats was not your responsibility to fix. You had every right to keep what you paid for.
Definitely NTA. People get mad at plus sized people for not buying an extra ticket and then they get mad when they do and don’t give up the extra seat if needed. You can’t win.
Didn’t even have to read the story/rationalization.
NTA
Edit: After reading through the story, even more NTA. The conductor failed, and the other people on the bus were jerks, minus the one individual who ended up giving their seat to the child. Others could have given up their seat just as easily. I assume most of them didn’t just have major surgery.
NTA at all…. Shame on the conductor. I would be contacting them and complaining about the terrible position they put you in and the ridicule you were subjected to
NTA gallbladder surgery isn’t no joke. Everything hurts and comfort is needed (I had mine out 6 months ago). The conductor is at fault for taking on more than capacity.
Why does every post lately feel like AI garbage.
NTA! I have an invisible disability and need two seats as well. “I have a disability/medical condition, and paid for the extra seat” is all you should have to say. Seriously those people should be ashamed. Not you.
This is entirely on the driver, and you should send a complaint to the company.
NTA. You had major abdominal surgery. Hope you heal quickly.
NTA , your not at fault , the bus conductor is, dont think about. Just look after your health
NTA. You paid for two seats for a valid medical reason. The bus company made a mistake, and it was their responsibility to fix it, not yours. You shouldn’t have to sacrifice your comfort and healing because of their oversight.
Nope. Conductor should have refunded the mother’s money and escorted them off the bus
NTA and you should write an email to their customer service about the conductor and how you felt during that interaction.
So why didn’t one of those good samaritans (who was so worried about the child not having a seat) offer to give up their seat and stand?
It’s so easy to offer what belongs to someone else rather than inconvenience yourself.
Most definitely NTA. Lack of planning on someone else’s part does not constitute an emergency (and inconvenience) on your part.
Nta. Health reasons trump passengers who hadn’t booked previously.
NTA. You paid for the seat. The seat wasn’t available. The driver could have put the mother off the bus, or the kid could sit in her lap.
NTA. You paid for two seats. This situation is all on the conductor. He should’ve been more aware of the amount of seats left before he allowed the mother and child on. It wasn’t about the money for reimbursement, it was about you needing the space that you PAID for.
Fat people can’t win. If they buy one seat, people complain they’re spilling over into someone else’s space. If the buy two seats, people complain they’re “hogging” a seat they don’t “really” need.
NTA and also not your problem. Tell the conductor you have paid for both seats and will be retaining both seats and that it is their issue to find a solution to *without* bothering you. Also let them know you don’t appreciate being publicly hounded and that no-one has a right to know your private medical history.
Nta why couldnt the mother have stood and let her child set? You booked 2 seats for a reason. You thought ahead. Its on her for not doing the same.
NTA
Fuck all of them, especially the bus driver.
And why didn’t these other assholes give THEIR stupid seat to the stupid mother? Since they were so concerned with being the good samaritan.
I truly hope this story is fake.
You’re TA for rephrasing the same post that gets put up here every goddamn day.
Nta
Wtf. They should have gotten off.
NTA sorry after doing everything right you were grievously wronged.