Location: Ontario, Canada
What to do when a daycare is mistreating you? At the beginning of June we had a meeting with the director of the daycare and one of the teachers. The informed us that unless we get an allergy test performed for our 2.5 year old he won’t be welcomed back.
Trying to keep it short – my son was born with pretty severe allergies to dairy and soy. He doesn’t go anaphylactic but he does get hives that turns into eczema which then causes him to itch and injure his skin more (even with filed down nails). We determined this through trial and error when he was a baby with different formulas and finally were prescribed Nutramigen by a pediatrician as his only source of food. Once he became too old for formula we’ve been trying different allergen-free food options. It’s been a long process and every once in awhile the ingredient list appears fine but if there’s trace soy in the product then he’ll react. Cooking oils are the biggest issue honestly.
We were very hesitant to put him in daycare to begin with because who knows what he could get his hands on. We had had our oldest in this daycare and the director convinced us she and her staff could take care of my youngest. We live in a very small town where there are really only 2 daycares, the other has a waiting list a mile long. I had not been able to work because I was caring for him, and my EI had run out. We had no option but to try.
So we started him there. And I went and got a job. We provided safe foods, children’s reactine, and creams for them to use. We also instructed them to contact us if they have any issues, Dad works in the same building and would go to retrieve him any time they asked. Which they did – a lot. We’ve been paying for many days where they sent him home for being “too difficult”.
They attribute all his behavioural issues to his “biological condition” as they kept calling it during the meeting. I offered that maybe some behavioural coaching (through another resource, not through them) would help, but they insist it’s his allergies. They’ve kicked him out until we get him tested. This is stemming from them feeding him cheerios without my knowledge (although they apparently told Dad) and him reacting. On the box it doesn’t list any ingredients he shouldn’t be able to have, but again with the trace ingredients we still struggle. It also wasn’t listed as one of his safe foods. Him reacting scared them. Which I understand, it’s something we deal with at home, but they also always had the option of contacting us and sending him home.
Now we have a consultation booked with an allergist, who still may not test him because he’s so young. A pediatric NP informed us they usually test around the age of 4. We have a note from his doctor saying he can return, and we’ve started a routine of giving him reactine in the morning and night as prescribed by the NP. He’s doing significantly better.
The daycare ghosted us for 3 weeks. And are now saying they can’t take him back until September because one of their staff quit, and because they’re demanding to see the allergy test results. They promised us he wouldn’t lose a spot, and then they ensured he can’t come back for 2 months.
I won’t go into detail about the conversation in the meeting but they implied that we’ve never taken him to a doctor, we don’t have his well-being in mind, I was told to be a bigger “bitch” to medical staff (the director’s words).
I don’t know what to do. We feel like he’s being discriminated against for a medical condition. My new job is being understanding, and my husband’s is trying to be as well, but this is a near impossible situation. We have no other support near us. I’ve reached out to the community to see if someone is available for childcare 1-2 days a week through the summer.
Do I have any legal recourse? Is it worth the fight? I’m afraid come September they’ll magically be too full to take him again. The daycare director thinks she’s a family friend but all she’s done is lied to us the last while.
Any advice or words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated.
Comments
r/legaladvicecanada
Do you have the daycare’s timeline/reentry date in writing?
Ime as a parent of a child with a food allergy, there is absolutely no reason an allergist wouldn’t be able to test your child at this age. We tested before mine was a year old.
It is reasonable that the daycare wants medical documentation and an allergy plan; this is a safety and liability issue. If your child’s allergies are so severe that unlisted trace elements cause reactions it may be beyond the daycare’s capacity to manage in the absence of a medical provider’s instructions.