So my cousin Jenna (29F) is getting married and her maid of honor Chloe wanted to throw her bachelorette party. I’ve got the biggest house and backyard in the fam, so Chloe kinda assumed I’d host it here. She said, “Your place is perfect, and it’s the biggest!”
I said no. I told them I love Jenna and wanna celebrate but I’m just not comfy hosting a wild party with a bunch of ppl I don’t really know, drinking late and all that. I’m worried about noise, mess, and just the whole vibe at my personal space. But I did offer to help with decorations, food, or chip in for another venue.
Chloe got all huffy and told Jenna I’m “selfish” and “unsupportive” bc I won’t share my space. Jenna then called me upset, saying I’m “letting her down” and being a bad family member since it’d be so convenient.
So, AITA for saying no to hosting even though I have the space, just cuz I don’t wanna deal with that kinda party?
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So my cousin Jenna (29F) is getting married and her maid of honor Chloe wanted to throw her bachelorette party. I’ve got the biggest house and backyard in the fam, so Chloe kinda assumed I’d host it here. She said, “Your place is perfect, and it’s the biggest!”
I said no. I told them I love Jenna and wanna celebrate but I’m just not comfy hosting a wild party with a bunch of ppl I don’t really know, drinking late and all that. I’m worried about noise, mess, and just the whole vibe at my personal space. But I did offer to help with decorations, food, or chip in for another venue.
Chloe got all huffy and told Jenna I’m “selfish” and “unsupportive” bc I won’t share my space. Jenna then called me upset, saying I’m “letting her down” and being a bad family member since it’d be so convenient.
So, AITA for saying no to hosting even though I have the space, just cuz I don’t wanna deal with that kinda party?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> The action I took was refusing to host my cousin’s bachelorette party at my house, even though I have the biggest space. This might make me the asshole because my cousin and her maid of honor feel I’m being unsupportive and selfish by not sharing my home for an important family celebration. They say I’m letting Jenna down and not being a good family member, which made me question if I’m overreacting or not doing enough for them.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
INFO: Are you even in the bachelorette party or do the just want your place?
But what ever, NTA. This is your space and you can say yes or no. And they have to accept that.
NTA , you ought to be comfortable with your own house.
Keep your boundaries and don’t even bother sending a gift or chipping in. They are entitled and don’t deserve it
Info – are you in the bridal party? I mean, even if you were it’s your house, you have the right to say no.
No, you arent, Its your house, you have the right to say no, BUT it does seem a little mean, couldn’t you put up with the mess for one night?
Again, your house, but you could?
NTA No one gets to volunteer your home for a party, which will likely involve lots of drunk, noisy ladies (including some you don’t know). If it gets messy and your possessions are broken, is Chloe going to take responsibility? No lol
I would let them use my space and talk about event rental space prices.
You’re going to have to move your items (bulk and no bulk) and lock them up in your own home in order to accommodate for it. That also includes decoration, prep, clean up, resettling the items in your space which probably means moving furniture around, setting up audio and visuals, etc.
That also includes the possibility of having strangers in your house as well.
Bottom line: If you don’t want to offer your home, you’re in no way obligated to do so. There are venues for that. My brother got married in one. They exist.
NTA.
Your house is your haven and you don’t need it turning into your HE 🏒🏒 because of pressures from another person.
Do you, boo. 💅🏾
NTA
No is a perfect sentence on its own. It seems like she doesn’t want to pay for a venue and if there are damages get sued, where as they would most likely ghost you over paying for damages.
You’re entitled to your space but I’m seriously going crazy over how little people are now willing to do for their family/friends.
I am really not the one to think you should sacrifice everything for your village but this extreme is nuts. The slightest inconvenience is too much.
Where is the balance? On one side there are people being almost slaves to their circle and on the other people who are not even willing to lift a finger for their cousin (who they are close enough to be invited to their bachelorette).
Again, you can say no.
But it’s one night.
And I would assume since it’s not in the post:
There is not much info in the post but based on what I read, you are only asked to provide space.
If nobody pitches in, community is dead.
That makes you NTA but a very bad/selfish cousin…
NTA – bachelorette parties should always be in a rented hall/restaurant/hotel… something like that. They are prone to become loud and messy, and if you host they can get you in trouble with your neighbours, and of course you would be expected to clean before and after the party.
NTA! If you’re not comfortable with people using your space for something, then thats fine. Chloe should respect that.
NTA at all, you are not part of the bachelorette people a case of we have the fun, you have the risk and cost?
NTA. They want to cause you inconvenience for their convenience.
NTA. You have good reasons, and you offered to help in other ways. They’re just hoping to freeload. Plus you can bet you’d get zero help with cleanup.
If they keep bugging you, “no” is a complete sentence
Why not go bar hopping? Isn
t that the usual thing? (Maybe I am too old, and since I havent been to a wedding in ages so do not actually know.)