When I was younger, my parents were married and my mom had this “friend” (38F). Let’s call her Sharon. Sharon was over at the house a lot. Like, a lot. They’d drink wine, talk for hours, have girls nights. My mom trusted her.
Two weeks after my parents’ divorce was finalized, my dad (42M) told me he was officially dating Sharon. He said nothing happened while he was married. Sharon said the same. They also said they didn’t tell me right away because they “didn’t want to confuse me” or “make things harder.” They didn’t announce it publicly for four months.
Here’s the thing: I already knew. I’m not stupid. The energy changed way before the divorce. Sharon started pulling away from my mom, acting awkward around me, showing up at weird times, then suddenly stopped coming over as my mom’s friend and started showing up as my dad’s girlfriend.
So yeah, I don’t pretend to be besties with her anymore. I’m polite when I have to be. I say hi. I say bye. I don’t scream or fight or throw tantrums. I just don’t fake a smile for someone who helped break my mom’s heart and now acts like I’m the problem for not giving her a Disney Channel stepmom welcome.
To make it worse, Sharon doesn’t work. She had a real job and quit it to pursue a “passion career” and now just vibes around the house like she’s the main character while my dad works and pays for everything—including her.
She’s been pushing to have alone time with my dad lately. I can tell. Suddenly every plan is “just for the two of them.” Now they’re planning a 10-day vacation and she told my dad she doesn’t want me there because I “create cold war energy.” She says I’m disrespectful. But I haven’t done anything except not pretend this isn’t weird. She says I act like she’s not family. I don’t. I just act like she’s not innocent.
And now I’m being excluded from my own father’s vacation because I didn’t pretend the past never happened.
So—AITA for not faking a relationship with my stepmom and making her feel “unwelcome,” even though she was my mom’s best friend and is the reason our whole family fell apart?
Because frankly, I don’t understand why anyone would like her either.
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When I was younger, my parents were married and my mom had this “friend” (38F). Let’s call her Sharon. Sharon was over at the house a lot. Like, a lot. They’d drink wine, talk for hours, have girls nights. My mom trusted her.
Two weeks after my parents’ divorce was finalized, my dad (42M) told me he was officially dating Sharon. He said nothing happened while he was married. Sharon said the same. They also said they didn’t tell me right away because they “didn’t want to confuse me” or “make things harder.” They didn’t announce it publicly for four months.
Here’s the thing: I already knew. I’m not stupid. The energy changed way before the divorce. Sharon started pulling away from my mom, acting awkward around me, showing up at weird times, then suddenly stopped coming over as my mom’s friend and started showing up as my dad’s girlfriend.
So yeah, I don’t pretend to be besties with her anymore. I’m polite when I have to be. I say hi. I say bye. I don’t scream or fight or throw tantrums. I just don’t fake a smile for someone who helped break my mom’s heart and now acts like I’m the problem for not giving her a Disney Channel stepmom welcome.
To make it worse, Sharon doesn’t work. She had a real job and quit it to pursue a “passion career” and now just vibes around the house like she’s the main character while my dad works and pays for everything—including her.
She’s been pushing to have alone time with my dad lately. I can tell. Suddenly every plan is “just for the two of them.” Now they’re planning a 10-day vacation and she told my dad she doesn’t want me there because I “create cold war energy.” She says I’m disrespectful. But I haven’t done anything except not pretend this isn’t weird. She says I act like she’s not family. I don’t. I just act like she’s not innocent.
And now I’m being excluded from my own father’s vacation because I didn’t pretend the past never happened.
So—AITA for not faking a relationship with my stepmom and making her feel “unwelcome,” even though she was my mom’s best friend and is the reason our whole family fell apart?
Because frankly, I don’t understand why anyone would like her either.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I’m being excluded from vacations for not treating this woman like my best friend and everyone except my mom says I’m immature
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA. She betrayed your mom and now wants to push you out? Cold war energy is justified. Stay strong. 💔
I’ve seen this story before🤔
Go talk to your dad and go live with your mom