I (20M) am living with my mom while my grandma is in hospice care. My friend, whom I’ll call Rob, has on multiple occasions called me and no its not like one call at a time. Last Saturday he called 13 times in a row. I genuinely think is is borderline harassment.
He called six times in a row today. Since my mom works from home and my only available room is the living room she works in (she lives in a two room apartment), I can’t be loud. So I tell him this and he gets angry as if it hurt him that I wouldn’t answer. He calls again. I warn him saying “One more call and I’m blocking you and reporting harassment.”
He seems hurt now.
AITAH?
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I (20M) am living with my mom while my grandma is in hospice care. My friend, whom I’ll call Rob, has on multiple occasions called me and no its not like one call at a time. Last Saturday he called 13 times in a row. I genuinely think is is borderline harassment.
He called six times in a row today. Since my mom works from home and my only available room is the living room she works in (she lives in a two room apartment), I can’t be loud. So I tell him this and he gets angry as if it hurt him that I wouldn’t answer. He calls again. I warn him saying “One more call and I’m blocking you and reporting harassment.”
He seems hurt now.
AITAH?
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Do you only speak in one volume or something? What about stepping outside?
It kind of sounds like you’re just blowing this friend off. Like, seriously, no one’s allowed to speak in the only room available in the apartment while your mom works? That makes no sense…
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I feel like I’m the AH because I refused to talk to my friend when he needed me to and threatened him.
I think this should be judged because I really just want to know
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
Youre young, you guys overthink everything. Just block him and unblock after work until he gets the idea, let him overreact and do his thing – if he leaves the friendship, ohwell. Not much of a friend anyway.
Im 31 and I do this all the time (sort of) to my best friend. I literally block him for a day or two on all medias if theres a game I didnt catch bc of life, he loves to spoil stuff so I just unblock when Ive caught up. Hes not butthurt and im happy. Its not that big of a deal.
Based on what you have said, YTA. If you don’t want to talk to them just say so. If you want to talk you could go into the other room, outside, for a walk or so on, even talk quietly on a headset. I guess I’m old but I do not understand blocking people I would call friends, let alone reporting for harassment!
NTA. Your friend needs to understand boundaries. A phone is not a leash.
Put the phone on silent.
NTA.
Your friend should understand that you can’t always answer the phone. He wasn’t taking your request seriously, so it was necessary to make it clear to him that this was a serious situation.
You don’t have to actually block him, but you absolutely should put your phone on silent and don’t answer any phone call if it would be distracting to your mom working. You can decide to go outside to take the call, or just text him that you will return his call at 5 pm or whatever.
ESH. He’s definitely calling you excessively, but like… you can take calls dude. You can step outside or speak quietly. If you don’t want to talk to this person at all, which is fine, don’t pretend it has anything to do with your mom or her job. That’s a problem you have total control over solving.
>her job is customer service calls so, yeah…noise is not really welcome
You realize most people do this job in a call center, which is a big room full of people all talking on the phone at the same time, right?
It’s 2025. Why can’t your friend text you while your mom is working? NTA.
NTA. This isn’t friendship, it’s obsession level clinginess. You set a clear boundary, and you had every right to protect your peace (and your mom’s job).
I do not understand this situation at all.
Why would someone call someone else freaking thirteen times in one day?
Why do you answer him if you don’t want to or cannot talk? Just don’t take the call and call back when it’s convenient for you. You can set your phone not to ring when the calls come from a particular number, instead of blocking completely, if you like. If you tell him no more calls but then still answer every time he calls (or eventually answer when he keeps on calling again and again), your actions speak louder than your words.
NAH but some weird ass phone etiquette for sure.
Not the AH. Bro’s calling like he’s trying to win a radio contest. You set a clear boundary and he acted like you kicked his dog. He needs to chill, not everything’s about him.
NTA
Your friend is not respecting your boundaries and is harassing you. I had to do the same thing to my best friend from pre school in high school when he wouldn’t stop calling at bad times repeatedly. Sometimes you have to cut ties.
Just mute his calls dude.
Turn your phone off
NTA. Why can’t he send a text.
“If I don’t pick up, that means I’m not available to talk. Calling me multiple times when you know I’m unavailable is really disrespectful. And getting angry/acting hurt when I communicate this fact is really AH-ish…bordering on emotional blackmail. If you want this friendship to continue, I need you to respect my boundaries.”
NTA. While ‘blocking’ someone isn’t my preferred method for something like this — I prefer firmly setting boundaries and ignoring/muting the phone when I’m not available — it is not AH-ish to cut off communication more firmly.
And it is AH-ish for Rob to use blatantly manipulative tactics to try to coerce you to change your behavior.
He’s too needy or clingy…..dump him for your peace of mind
You can adjust notifications for given callers on many phone platforms. Do that.
NTA, but he definitely is. That’s behavior I expect from a 10yo who just got a phone for the first time… not someone in their 20s.
NTA. No means no.
Friend? Nah honey that’s a stalker or creeper behavior. Block it.
NTA. Just mute/block him when you aren’t available. You can always unmute/unblock later if, for some inexplicable reason you want your pathetically needy friend to be able to contact you.
Turn your ringer off.
If your friend doesn’t understand boundaries and acts personally attacked for you enforcing them they are not friends they are merely a thorn in your side.
NTA, and it is harassment. And does he realize texting is a thing?
NTA. Is this guy 12?
Tell him you will not answer any calls from him between 9-5 or whatever hours. Period. Ever. Turn your damn ringer off. If you keep your phone nearby you don’t need it on anyway. Get out of the house as much as you can. Your mom is working. Shouldn’t you be at school? If you’re on break, get a summer job.
He can text you. You can call him back when you are outside and available.
Your mom is working to afford the home she is letting you stay in. That takes priority over your needy, childish friend. Honestly he might be a little obsessed with you or bored and bad at entertaining himself, and he should probably get a job himself.
A guy who calls so many multiple times is unhinged. Block him.
Is it 1985 again? Flashback to Dad yelling at me to get off the phone.
NTA, but if he’s calling you on a cell phone, just turn off your ringer and ignore his calls. You don’t have to answer.
Was it an emergency? Why is he calling me 13 times in a row, just so he can have a casual conversation?
“I’m going on the computer, no one pick up the phone”
This is 2025, are you lost?