Getting an abortion, lost most of my social circle.

I posted this and this in regards to the absolute rollercoaster I’ve been through in the last 48 hours since finding out I am pregnant.

I just want to say that I did not expect all of the love and support I have received from posting here. Thank you. I did not ever think I would be getting more support from Reddit than I would from my real life friends…but here we are.

A few months ago, I had a pregnancy scare that turned out to be just a late period, and I saw the beginnings of the behavior I’m going to detail below…but it didn’t really tip me off to how bad it could get.

I didn’t want to tell anyone when I took the test two days ago, but within a few hours I told my mom and boyfriend. Yesterday, I told my friend. I just needed support. I obviously didn’t get it which is why I’ve been profusely posting on reddit. I also do have a therapist and I had an appointment yesterday btw. I also have only been living in my current city and state for a year, so that’s why everything feels so magnified because my social circle was already so so small. I only knew one girl from before I moved here and I thought she was one of my best friends until this happened.

You can read about my mom and boyfriends reactions in my previous posts. When I had my first scare, the girl I mentioned above (who I will call A) I told was rather rude about it like “im not helping you raise that thing” was the first thing she said and then a week later she had her own pregnancy scare which I thought was oddly timed. I was nice to her about it I think. I remember telling her that some people try and try and try to get pregnant and fail, and since she used a condom, it was pretty unlikely. It hurt that she didn’t try to comfort me in the same way. This time, I don’t know why I expected anything different. I feel stupid.

She’s always been a pretty politically involved person like she has gone to basically every left leaning protest since I met her, and she’s really loudly pro-choice. All of the other people I surround myself with are also allegedly pro-choice.

I told her, and she called me reckless and told me that I was childish for not using a condom with my boyfriend and she laughed and said “you could have spent $10 on protection, and now you’re going to spend $800 fixing it” (not true, my insurance will probably cover it bc its going to be classified as therapeutic based on what ER told me, I realize I’m very lucky).

And she basically shamed me telling me that it’s my fault I got pregnant and that tons of people “actually need” abortions and because I was just being “stupid” by not using a condom, it wasn’t a legitimate reason to get one and that I’m just using it as “retroactive birth control.”

I have never been spoken to with such vitriol. A ghosted me yesterday — hasn’t replied to me all day. She also told all of our mutual friends who are now not speaking to me. I’m so confused.

A and I have known each other for seven years and tbh she has always been a bit of a bad person but I didn’t realize it until I told my therapist and my therapist pointed out that she is a pretty shit friend. I’m not going to speak to her anymore. And I know I’m going to lose more friends for that

Has anyone else experienced anything like this? I know it’s more common in conservative spaces for women who get abortions to be treated this way but…all of my friends are supposedly liberal. I just want to know if anyone else’s social circle showed their true colors after their abortion