I (20F) have been in a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend (22M) for some time now. We’re technically still together, but I feel like I’ve already been on a break emotionally, even though we never officially broke up.
I’ve had several conversations with him about how important communication, reassurance, and effort are to me—especially in a long-distance relationship. I’ve explained how hurt I feel when I’m ignored, and how all I want is to feel considered and like I matter. But nothing changes.
He continues doing his own thing, barely replies, and when I bring up how I feel, he either says “life is busy” or makes me feel like I’m being overly emotional. I’ve stayed calm and patient, but now I’m tired. It feels like I’m the only one trying to keep this going.
We agreed to “focus on ourselves” for a bit—a kind of soft break—but it already feels like I’ve been on that break alone for a while now. I’m still technically in the relationship, but emotionally I don’t feel present anymore.
I don’t want to break up, and he says he doesn’t either, but his actions don’t match his words. I feel confused and overlooked, and I’m not sure if I’m holding onto something that’s already fading or just hoping for change that may never come.
TL;DR: I’m 20F in a long-distance relationship with my 22M boyfriend. I’ve clearly communicated my needs for reassurance and effort, but nothing changes. I feel emotionally alone in a relationship where I’m the only one trying. I don’t know whether to keep holding on or let go.