I (29F) and my younger sister (26F) moved in together last year to split living costs. Our rent is $1,200 total, so each of us pays $600. We also split utilities and groceries.
Recently my sister’s been tight on cash. A few times she’s missed her rent deadline or asked me to cover her share temporarily, promising to pay me back. I’ve fronted her $600 twice in the last three months because she said she was between jobs.
Last week I came home early, used our shared home computer to sort through household bills, and noticed a confirmation email in her inbox showing she’d purchased two $250 concert tickets, $500 total, despite claiming she couldn’t afford rent.
I was stunned. She couldn’t make her rent on time but had splurged on concert seats. The next day I told her I couldn’t keep covering her half. I asked her to pay her rent promptly or face late fees. She reacted angrily, telling me to mind my own business and accusing me of acting like her parent instead of her sister.
I reminded her that our rental agreement is shared responsibility and if she can afford concerts she can afford rent. Now she’s upset and calling me unsupportive, and mutual friends are divided, some say I should cut her some slack, others say she’s being irresponsible.
My own budget is stretched with student loans and everyday expenses. AITA for refusing to front her rent after finding out she spent hundreds on concert tickets?
Comments
Fake as fizzuck
NTA. She is financially irresponsible.
IF this is real then NTA obviously. She agreed to half the bills and lives there, she needs to be responsible like an adult.
Sounds like she is taking advantage of your familial ties.Tell her she needs to pull her weight or move in w/your parents/sucker who doen’t know her MO.
NTA. You’re not punishing her, just protecting yourself. Covering rent isn’t the same as helping someone in crisis when they’re clearly prioritizing luxuries over responsibilities.
NTA – yes, that’s called adulting. It’s when your roommates have to act like your parent because you’re acting like a child.
NTA
You are not the asshole for expecting your sister to pay her share of the bills on time. Living together means shared responsibility and trust. When she cannot cover rent but spends money on concert tickets that is irresponsible. You have already helped her twice by fronting her money. It is reasonable to set boundaries to protect your own finances. It is not your job to cover her debts or act like a parent especially when she chooses to spend money elsewhere.
She is upset because she got caught being careless with money but that does not mean you are unsupportive. You are being practical and fair. If she cannot manage her money better that is on her not you. You have your own financial obligations and it is okay to expect her to do her part.
This sounds like bullshit to me. You talked to your friends about this and some of them are divided? It’s clear as day. If she has money for tickets then she has money for rent. You are also an asshole for looking through her emails. But again this sounds fake.
u/bot-sleuth-bot
NTA. I know it is hard, you have to let her hit rock bottom before she can get up again.
NTA. If you don’t stop this now, you’ll always be covering her bills so she can use her own money for fun things instead. We all have things we’d rather do with money than pay bills, but life doesn’t work that way.
YTA I mean do you actually have friends telling you that you are wrong?
Mind your own business and let her face the dead line l. NTA
NTA. Her responsibilities should come first.
“Mutual friends are divided”, classic reddit fiction text. Have seen a few fictional pieces tonight with the old faithful reddit cliches like this one and “family is divided” and “being petty”.
Ugh, classic younger sibling, they see you as a pseudo parent who will always bail them out. NTA, and maybe get a different roommate when your lease is up. Being roommates can ruin good friendships, I’d hate for it to ruin a sibling relationship.
NTA. She’s completely financially irresponsible so you should reconsider living with her.
You are right to refuse to cover any of her expenses, when she’s just blowing cash, she doesn’t have. She’s basically broke and prioritizing concerts when she should be getting a second job and handling her financial deficit.
She doesn’t get to be so irresponsible with money and make it your problem. You need to draw very clear line in the sand on this, and I recommend you find a different place to live, or find a new roommate, because it doesn’t sound like she has grown up yet.
If you want to maintain a positive relationship with your sister, then it would be a good idea not to do business together. Unfortunately, being roommates is a business situation requiring a lot of handling of money, and that gets messy when you mix it with family.
Has to be an AI post. What mutual friend wouldn’t take your side LOL
Her failure to pay can bring down your credit rating. It sounds like rent is not a priority for her. You need to find a new roommate asap. NTA.
When does your lease end? I would tell her you’re finding a new roommate at the end of the lease and she can figure out her own living arrangements and handle her own finances without you as her safety net. If she doesn’t want you to act like her parent then she needs to start being an adult. Being a financially irresponsible 26yo isn’t a good look and pretty pathetic for someone close to 30.
NTA but YWBTA if you continue enable her behavior.
If you do this you might as well get ready to pay the entire rent, utilities and groceries bc that’s where this is headed very shortly. She’s seen that she’s gotten away with it twice, played the between jobs card and lived her best life role to the hilt. Don’t be surprised when she asks you for spending money. Either find a new roomie or get ready to support her as much as SHE DECIDES and loves it.
Bad news. Your sister is an AI.
But you already knew that.
NTA at all. If she’s got $500 for concert tickets, she can pay her rent. You’re not her parent t setting fair boundaries.
NTA. Look for different living arrangements. Sis is not a good roommate. Either she goes or you do.
YTA-She does this because she can, and you will cover her and keep covering for her. Either grow a spine and set boundaries or shut up and pay up. I mean, why would you even doubt that enabling her is a good decision?
It seems like her finances aren’t any of your business UNTIL she runs out of money, then she thinks it’s your business. NTA.
NTA – she made it your business when you had to cover her. Stop paying her bills and find a better roommate
u/bot-sleuth-bot
If you are jointly on the lease/utilities, you will be responsible for late fees too if her half is not paid. It will affect your credit as well as hers. So…you should not have to pay her parts, but if you do not when they are due, you could face consequences too.
End of the day she is a liar simple, now you will always have doubts because of a small lie but a lie none the less
NTA
Time to grow up.
NTA It is not fair that she forces you to always be the responsible one and keep enough extra cash on hand to cover for her irresponsible behavior whenever she feels like it. It’s an important lesson for her to learn or face consequences.
Tell her that if she doesn’t pay half of all the expenses, and pay you back what she owes you, then you will not be living together when the lease is up. Tell her to borrow money from somewhere else to pay you back.
She thinks that since you are her sister, you will support her financially. Put a stop to that now. Remind her constantly about what she owes you so she’ll know that you won’t let it go.
Tell any mutual friends or family that think you should cut her some slack that they can pay you what she owes you and pay her expenses for her.
Updateme!
NTA. Let’s hope this is the wakeup call your sister needs to put bills first and other luxuries last. A responsible, even somewhat responsible, adult pays their bills first and sees what they have left for luxuries after
She could ask you if the concert was so important, she knew how unreasonable it was and so she lied and ask you for more contributions.
First of all she’s a bad roommate, second a bad sister. NTA
Those “mutual friends” who are on her side are not your friends, their hers. What she’s doing is unacceptable. Time for a new roommate.
NTA you have been enabling her each month you covered for her. That only hurts her since it slows her down from learning how to manage money. I would not renew the lease or she will drag you down.