My girlfriend went to the bar with her friend recently and she tells me they met these two super cool guys and went over to stay the night at their place after. She claims she slept on the couch while one guy slept in his room and her friend hooked up with the other guy. This morning she comes home wearing the same clothes and smeared makeup from the night before. I’m so torn on do I believe her or not. And even if that is the truth did she cross a line or cheat by not asking me if this is ok. If there is more to this story than she is telling me what exactly?
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Even if nothing happened, which I doubt, a person in a committed relationship doesn’t spend the night with someone else. Especially men she just met. I would end it.
This is such a basic and obvious betrayal of your trust and relationship it’s outrageous. She put you in the position where the most logical conclusion is she cheated on you. That is a terrible thing to do to your partner. Even if she didn’t (which I don’t believe), she’s risking your relationship by breaking a very basic boundary and also putting her safety at risk (she could have been assaulted or worse).
This is 100% on her to prove she didn’t cheat and this won’t happen again or anything like it. If she can’t or won’t, assume she cheated and move on as best you can.
What your guts saying? Is she able to do that? Has happened before?
You know her better than anyone on reddit.
Trust your 6th sense and get an explanation. If she overreacts, you got your answers
It sounds like, regardless of the situation, this is something where a boundary was crossed.
You should definitely make that very clear to her, like “Hey, I feel kind of hurt that you’d go and sleep over at another guy’s house without consulting with me.”
Because honestly, whether she slept with him or not doesn’t seem to be the core issue. The core issue is, she jumped a boundary you had.
I’d make sure the boundary is clear, your thoughts are made known. Then, I’d make sure you both are in agreement about the boundary for the future.
Honestly she disrespected you by staying over at another guys house she can drive she’s not relying on her friend to drive so there’s no reason to stay and she didn’t even let you know and see if that would make you uncomfortable. If you don’t trust her anymore and if she doesn’t care that she made you uncomfortable only you can decide if the relationship is worth keeping
That is 100% a boundary crossed, if you’re in a committed relationship you do not spend the night at someone else’s place. Tell her you need 100% truth here and a commitment to not doing anything like this in the future
Did she let you know while doing it and took your opiiion into consideration or did she drop this on you when she returned? No one in a happy relationship goes home with a stranger and spends the night. Very suspicious
She crossed the line of respect for the relationship. Time to move on.
Dump her.
She obviously had sex with the other guy.
She’s single mate.
Go find happiness.
Dude. C’mon now.
In a healthy relationship both parties care about each other’s feelings. Her carousing at another man’s house is clearly not going to make you feel good. I believe she got swayed by her friend. Perhaps to protect her friend from this stranger now her lover. What this means is that your girlfriend is still tied to her peer group. This is a natural process of growing up where the peer group is important in teenage years. Then as you mature you break away from the group and start your own family. The two of you need to discuss this. She needs to acknowledge your feeling betrayed and disrespect. Choices will have to be made as to where her loyalty lies.
I’d have kicked her to the curb so fast she wouldn’t have had time to shower.
Yep, this is unacceptable.
Honestly, when I go out without my other half I get an hour or so in and just want to leave to be with him. I certainly wouldn’t be spending the night at a couple of random guys house. As another Redditor said “it’s a basic and obvious betrayal” . Wise up and GTFO there.
Let’s be real she cheated…point blank there isn’t a what if, she went by two “super cool guys” house and slept on the couch sounds fishy
It is obvious that the other gave her what was hers, if you stay with her you are very stupid
Updateme
You have every right to feel sick! No way would I be just “okay” hearing this!!!!!
She’s probably telling you a half truth that way she doesn’t feel as guilty. This is not a good situation
Yeah this would be a one & done situation….imagine if you did that.
What she did was horribly disrespectful to you and your relationship. But the bigger issue is how you’re feeling about all this right now. You are unsure if you should trust her or not. That shows that you do not trust her because you’re questioning it. Where there is no trust there is no relationship
That’s biggest form of disrespect why didn’t she get a taxi home or call you when it happened personally ild say pay your boundaries and tell her that’s not okay at all you’ll only be treated how you allow yourself to be treated
Not girlfriend behavior. She isn’t acting like she’s in a relationship. Time to move on. If this is the type of choices she’s making she’s not ready to be with you. You’ll find someone who is ready ima couple of weeks. Trust me.
This has to be a fetish post or something
She is not committed to your relationship if she felt this was appropriate to do. She freely opened herself up to another man by spending the night. Sorry dude. NOR
Even what she told you sounds bad lmao
You should feel betrayed. Even if nothing happened, which is possible, I’ve been the drunk girl who played wingman in the early oughts, and my mom did it in the 70s, and nothing happened, she’s playing a very dangerous game.
I have stories on stories about the ways I could have been taken off the planet for piss poor decisions. It’s a miracle that I made it to 40. That she went home with two unknown men is terrifying. Bianci and Buono come to mind. Regardless of what happened and what happens in the future with your relationship, she needs to be less flagrant with her life.
I didn’t know a 24F had to feel inclined to ask permission to her boyfriend to sleepover a friends house. If there is little trust in a relationship, it’ll fail anywhere. That’s where ya’ll seem you’re headed.
This is fake. No adult human being in their right mind would condone or believe this.
I stand by my assertion that this is a karma whoring fake post, but on the 1% chance that it isn’t, your girlfriend cheated on you. Be fucking real.
Oh boy – 100% get out. Now. Fully. She’s going to wreck you. Nobody does this if they’re into somebody.