My wife F59 and I M48, who have been married for 25 years and are debt-free, including our house, have a rule to discuss purchases over $50. She has paying for a cruise for a while since before our debts were paid off. Our in-laws frequently go on cruises, despite their financial struggles, and always encourage her. She’s the planner who manages the budget and is highly organized. However, she surprised me by buying this cruise for our two daughters and two granddaughters, whom we’re raising, all without my knowledge.
While she has about five to six hobbies, I have only three. One of my hobbies is car stuff, and we never pay for a mechanic. My main interest is vintage computers and computers in general, which I rarely paid for until recently. Over the past 25 years, I mostly recycled customer systems and kept them. At my last Vintage Computer Festival, I packed my lunches for two days and only bought t-shirts and a small painting. It was a long holiday weekend, so I didn’t take any time off from work.
She sprung this on me and has already spent non-refundable money. We’ll also have to fly from Dallas to Alaska and spend thousands more. I’m deeply resentful and don’t even like the idea of a cruise. I’d rather take a car trip and explore non-tourist areas. I’m currently on a diet and don’t drink, so I feel I’d be confined to a small cabin room for days. To make matters worse, I just found out that next year’s Vintage Computer Festival coincides with the cruise.
I’m actively seeking a new job so that she can retire, as we’ll need my benefits. I’m upset that she did this. She “officially” asked me to go last week, and she wants me to go willingly. Am I a jerk not to go on a cruise? The empty spot won’t be wasted. My nephew is dying to go.
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Memories are more important than anything in this world.
It sounds like you have the money for the cruise. Why would you not want create these lifelong memories for your kids and grandkids? It should’ve been discussed for sure, but I’d 100% go if it were me.
Talk to your wife and politely decline to go because you need to stay home for job opportunities. If your nephew can go instead of you the spot on the cruise is not wasted.
I completely identify with how you feel. You have every right to politely decline her offer to attend the cruise you helped pay for without your consent.
Memories are the Most important aspects in life. In 25 years Thats all what you have left when you chill in your couch.
You look back and think about memories and not about the money you saved
Go on the cruise. Life is short.
Mark my words – she’ll make you pay for not going one way or the other.
I’m not a fan of spending that kind of money without the other partner’s consent. I agree with you there. However, I also believe that life is too short. Maybe this is the perfect opportunity for you to go have fun and make lasting memories with your family.
Edited for typo
Married for 25 years. She has been wanting to go on a cruise for years and you refused. Are you surprised that she finally took matters into her own hands? You got your way for 25 years by not cruising. Now it’s her turn.
Money spent on travel is never money wasted. Life is about experiences and most experiences are made better by sharing them with the people we love. I understand wanting to go to your convention, but you’ve been before and you will hopefully have opportunity to go again. You are raising these four people, and you made a lifetime commitment to your wife, so I’m assuming you have an emotional connection to them. Enjoy the cruise and experience the world through their eyes and with your partner by your side.
My good man, you’re 48 and she’s 59
Realistically at this age, you’re lucky to wake up and see another day with her. Take the jump. See the world. Go on that cruise. You’re not gonna take a single penny to your grave. Going to one cruise isn’t going to bankrupt you
Next year u will still be in your 40s and married to a 60 year old. She probably looks at it like she better go now, because in 5 years maybe she won’t be as able bodied as she is now.
Go spend some money on one of your hobbies
Plenty of couples take separate vacations. Have you talked to your wife about your just going to your vintage computer thing & she go on the cruise with family?
I personally think you’ll miss out on a family trip, but on the other hand, you need to do what you really want to do.
Sounds like you can afford the cruise so maybe stop griping about it since it’s done. Yes she should have talked to you about it first, but that horse has left the barn.
I get you don’t want to go but she has obviously always wanted to go. After 25 years you know marriage is a lot of compromise. Go on the cruise. Alaskan cruises are amazing. Anytime we have cruises we are only in our room for changing, showers, and sleep. There is so much to do. While I get you don’t want to go, take the time with your family. Tomorrow is never promised and since you are keeping some kind of strange scorecard you have the ball to do what you want next year.
A surprise cruise Yay. That is NOT ok. Especially without asking.
Frankly, if I were her I’d want to go on the cruise with or without you. Are you sure you’re only 48? Because you sound like you’re older than her.
My husband hates the idea of cruises for many of the reasons you listed. The only one he is considering is an Alaska one because we just wouldn’t go to those places if it wasn’t on a cruise. Driving to and around Alaska just isn’t a safe or realistic trip for us at our age (50).
I get it. I have a lot of reservations about cruises in general, especially environmentally and just the impact they have on the ports. My husband and I have also each lost 100 lbs, so I get the diet thing as well. The all you can eat stuff doesn’t appeal to us at all. Other than having lots of options.
Step back and ask yourself if you would enjoy it at all. If you think you could enjoy the stops, I would go. If you will be miserable the whole time, be honest. My husband and I would sit down and talk it out. I might disagree with him, but if he said no I would be fine with it. Honestly I would to him “If the kid and I come back and are just gushing about the trip, will you regret missing out?” Of course he could answer “What if it ends up being the poop cruise.” And we could go on all day. But I would respect his choice (and make sure to talk about nothing but our amazing cruise for a few weeks when I come home.)
Which are you going to be upset over if you wake up tomorrow and roll over to discover that they died in the middle of the night? Your wife or an old computer?
She didn’t ask because she knew you’d say no. She probably thought you wouldn’t even enter the notion. Because it seems like you aren’t even entertaining the notion even after it’s been bought. I’m sure this is something that she has wanted for a very long time. Do you guys ever go on vacation? Travel? This is an opportunity to spend quality time with your family. They will never forget this vacation, and they will never forget your reaction to it or your absence from it. I have a dad that always shit on everybody”s hopes and wishes, that never spent time with us because he was always too busy. We all hate and resent him, and do the bare minimum to take care of him. Don’t be that dad. Don’t be that husband. You have an opportunity here, don’t let how it came about cause you to make a big mistake
I just went on a cruise in May, we had about 10 of us. I had the same reservations as you seemed like I was kind of forced into it either come or stay at home kind of thing. I have to tell you I had the best time of my life. And I will do it again. We had fine dining every night. We had entertainment every night. Give it a try you might like it
Alaska is amazing and seeing it by cruise is by far the most practical way for most people. It sounds like you should have a separate conversation about budget priorities. As far as the cruise is concerned, you should go! Your wife of 25 years didn’t book a family cruise to hang out with your nephew. Go have a once in a lifetime adventure. She clearly wants to go and even if you’re less enthusiastic about it you should go to support her interests and your time together as a family. Hopefully in the future she’ll go with you to things that you’re passionate about as well. If I booked an exciting vacation and my spouse responded with “ugh, why would do that, I’ll stay home and you can take our nephew” I’d be less excited about both the vacation and my spouse. Go spend this valuable time with your family and at least try to have an open mind about it.
She should have discussed it first, but you know she has wanted to go for years. She should have went with a friend if you werent interested but paying for the 2 kids and grandkids is definitely something that should have been 2 yeahs or it doesnt happen would say everyone is the jerk
I get you’re upset that she spent money without discussing with you and that should obviously be addressed. The bigger issue I read in your post is that you do what you want without her and she has been asking to do this together for a while and you’ve been refusing. Just because you don’t drink doesn’t mean you’re stuck in the cabin. Just because this isn’t your first choice doesn’t mean you should refuse to go. Relationships are about compromise. You should go and make the best of it and make memories with your spouse and family. The fact you spend all your time on your hobbies alone and don’t do anything with her makes me understand why she went ahead and booked without asking you. I think you all should reevaluate how you approach quality time together and communication overall.
Been married 30 yrs. He’s a former sailor. Hates the idea of a cruise. I always wanted to go on one.
Finally, I did. Went to Alaska with our daughter and family. Had the best time ever.
He stayed home. Jealous as hell that he didn’t go. Now he wants us to go together to Alaska next yr. Told him I’m going on a different cruise with our daughter and family and he can come on that one or wait until I’m ready to go back to Alaska.
May seem petty, but we traveled how he wanted to for most of our marriage and now that we’re in our 50’s, I’m done waiting for him.
Stop being so rigid OP, you’re going to miss the best years.
having been on 2 alaska cruises…go. Especially if its financially feasible. always remember, “happy wife,happy life”. Who knows, you may just enjoy yourself.
It’s one cruise and Alaskan cruises are amazing.
Ya it’s annoying, but this is not something you’ll do repeatedly. Just go and enjoy and then get back to your normal routine
Keep your mouth shut and plan get your fat butt on the family planned cruise!
Let your nephew go, and see how that works out.
You can’t take money with you when you die. She waited until you were debt free to do this. You sound incredibly cheap and while having debts I understand that but now that you don’t, please enjoy life a little. You never know how much time you have left with someone.
Should she have told you? Yes. But you sound like a curmudgeon and I can see why she hesitated
Updateme!
I’m 52F. Your wife is at the age where we start to look back and see all the things we didn’t do because we prioritized others – raised kids, made a home, supported our spouse’s career (and hobbies). We see all the small things we wanted that we were denied. We then look at how we want to spend our remaining years. You are going to be back here crying that she left you “out of nowhere”.
This is such a small thing that she clearly wants and you can’t even do that for her. I’d love to hear her version of events.
What exactly have you got out of denying her this for 25 years? Not going seems petty and vindictive of you. You need to take a step back and think about whether you actually like this woman. She’s showing you she doesn’t need you to do the things she wants. When woman check out of a relationship they are done done. This is likely her giving you one last chance.
At this age, you should go
Why do you think you are going to be “stuck in a box” while on the cruise?
There are tons of things to do. Sit on deck and watch for whales or dolphins. Swim in the pool. There is always some sort of entertainment. And you aren’t on the boat the whole time!
Typically you travel by night and are in port, or getting into port when you wake up. Then you do things….
There is a cruise that my husband and I want to do. (54f and 43m) It is a cruise on a river that takes you from Budapest to Amsterdam. So. Many. Castles.
But you know….it’s really a “me” thing. I love history. And he is happy to go with.
Confined to a small cabin? Are you serious? Go on youtube and watch some cruise videos. You have no idea what you’re talking about.
So guy your wife wants to go on a cruise with you and plans it all out, after waiting many years probably for you to be a good partner and take her on one. And all you can do is complain instead of indulging her.
Why in the world would you be confined to your cabin during an Alaska cruise? SMH, have fun my man, you’re killing your marriage. This might as well be posted in Would I be the A-hole if, and yes, you’d be the A.
Btw, you can’t even drive to many of the cities that you will see on a cruise. Enjoy life. I am harsh to get you off of the nonsensical place you are in your head and heart.
Lmao a rule for purchases over 50 dollars? In 2025? Are you a fuckin stunad?
You can afford it and this is the first time she’s done something like this after a Quarter of a century? Dude, I feel like you don’t even know how good you have it and you’re gonna shoot yourself in the foot because you don’t want to… go on a vacation with your wife who is excited about something and wants to share it with you.
It’s not for you, it’s for her. The fact that you don’t drink on a cruise also won’t be a big deal, you won’t be confined to your room! You have to be open to possibility, there’s lots of activities without alcohol and this is an opportunity for you to make your wife happy, and you make memories with your family.
Dude you really need to step out of your comfort zone a bit. Your wife has arranged a HOLIDAY, not a week volunteering to pack emergency supplies in a war zone. Yes you would be a jerk to not go on holiday. You might actually enjoy it.
Just to add, my FIL didn’t speak to my MIL for a week when she booked a holiday without consulting him. Because it was somewhere different and out of his usual comfort zone. They have since been back multiple times. He is now too unwell to travel but they have those holiday memories to cherish. Give it a shot. You can go to the vintage computer festival next year.
Go. This is a great opportunity to spend time and make memories for your daughters and granddaughters. As in, think about someone other than yourself. Consider giving some of your time to someone other than yourself.
Your family would enjoy this trip. Your family would enjoy the experiences. This has the opportunity to create a once-in-a-lifetime family memory for your girls.
I honestly think you would be selfish to deny them your presence. No, you don’t owe them that. They certainly could go without you. But your absence would speak volumes about how little you value them. It would show them how weak your desire to spend time with them is. Although from your attitude here, I’m sure they already know…
Life isn’t just about you. I’m sure you’d be happy to be left alone to do your thing, unbothered…but you made a family. It’s self-centered to only think of yourself and ignore everyone else.
Go with your family. Don’t grouch and pout. Try to be present and pleasant, and watch them be happy. Be happy that they are having a good time, and step out of yourself long enough to enjoy their joy.
Here’s a different point of view for you…my grandparents took all 3 of their kids and their 4 grandkids on a cruise when I was 12, my sister was 8, and my cousins were 7 and 3. I’m 39 now, my sister is 35 and my cousins are 34 and 31.
Even though our grandfather passed away 8 years ago, we STILL bring up that cruise in conversation whenever we get together. It was the only vacation we all took together honestly and it really is a memory that lasts a lifetime. Go!
If you can make your diet work on a road trip you can make it work while being on a cruise. Plus it’s next year? If you’re on a diet for that long you should have some indulgences built in.
You are being a jerk. It’s a family thing to build memories. Stop being self centered, put a smile on your face and put your wife, kids, and grandkids first.
Tell your wife you come first. Your hobbies come first. Your approval comes first. Go to your convention because you come first. One day you’ll come to an empty home. But at least you’ll come first.
If you go on the cruise you will make everyone miserable bc you missed your convention. So just go. No one will miss you. She waited 25 yrs
You aren’t a jerk, she spent the money without asking you.
You need to talk to her and find out why she did it – maybe she feels she is getting too old and that’s her last chance to go on a cruise.
If I were you, I’d go – it’s actually not a bad experience and there’ll be plenty of things to do.
Oh look, another man who only wants to do what HE wants. Big surprise. You’re lucky your marriage lasted this long.
She’s been wanting to go on a cruise for 25 years as a couple and you never have? It’s not all about you, do something nice for your wife for a change and stop focusing on yourself for once.
I agree with the overwhelming majority of commenters here that you should go on this cruise, but I want to point out something that not a lot of people are recognizing: Why are you even saving all this money? Packing lunches? Doing all your own car maintenance? You’re clearly saving for something… But what?
I’m assuming it’s so you can “someday” enjoy the fruits of your labor? OP, this is “someday”! Sooooo… enjoy it? This is the EXACT thing that people do to celebrate their hard work in life. On cruises nearly everything is paid for with the cost of the ticket. Every single meal is an experience. All you can eat of all the “fancy” meals. Dozens of non alcoholic drink options. There is so much entertainment to experience, you’ll not likely see it all.
Don’t be so focused on saving money that you forget the whole point. Live a fulfilling life surrounded by the people you love most in the world.
And please don’t be resentful of a surprise your partner has worked really hard for. If you surprised her with an expensive gift, how would you want her to respond? Go act in kind. Go apologize and get on board! (Pun intended)
I just got back from a cruise and I don’t drink! It’s not all about drinking, honestly. Are you more annoyed that she has booked this without your knowledge, or that it’ll mean you missing your festival? Has your wife had to take a backseat for the past 25 years because of your hobbies (that sound expensive)?
Let it go, you’re only robbing yourself. The only thing that could make this a “waste” of money is your attitude robbing joy from the experience. This sounds like a core family memory for everyone.
I think you’re more upset that she spends money on a cruise because you don’t like the idea of it. If she spends that on surprising you with a trip to the car event, you would be over the moon. It makes you sound so.ungrateful. she’s wanted to do this forever and your having a tantrum. I’m guessing has never said no to something you have.wanted to do.
Just because you’re not drinking doesn’t mean you’ll be stuck to your cabin. If you open your mind, you’ll probably enjoy it. Plenty of people go on cruises and don’t drink.
Do this one thing for her. Sometimes in a relationship you have to do things for your partner. Yours is sucking it up and enjoying a holiday.
I see someone who carefully planned to pay for this cruise to spend time with her family… and I see you doing solo activities like old car shows, and old computer shows.
At some point, what are you saving the money for? Do you get any joy out of spending time with your daughters and grandkids? Because your kids aren’t gonna be drinking so can’t you go with them and see what they’re doing and have fun?
Also, if your preferred vacation is to drive somewhere, have you planned those vacations? Or are they all hypothetical?
Yes. You’re a jerk. You’re absolutely a jerk.
Yes you’re a jerk. She lived 25 years by your idiotic rules and had enough. Dude live a little, the computer geek convention will go on without you for one year. Make a memory with your wife and kids.
You wouldn’t be a jerk for not going, but you would be a jerk for ruining this for her by harping on it. My mother wants to go on an Alaska cruise, while my father has said that the one cruise he took to Mexico was his ‘one and only’, so my mother and I are discussing going ourselves in a few years. This has been a dream for your wife for some time, she’s been saving for it for quite a while, and now she wants to enjoy it with her family. Let her know that you’d prefer to give your cruise spot to your nephew and see if she’s up for a car trip at another point, just the two of you.
Stop being a grouch and just go enjoy the cruise. You sound like the 59 year old in the relationship.
Money comes and goes. You’re old. Your responsibilities are paid off. Go make love to your wife on the cruise. You sound grumpy and like you need it. She deserves to do what she wants to do too.
Is the work truly 50/50 when it comes to raising the granddaughters?
It doesn’t matter how many hobbies someone has. It’s been 25 years if she wants to go on a cruise she should be able to go. She deserves to have fun too. Sounds like she didn’t discuss it with you because she knew you’d say no.
I’ve been on 2 cruises one was amazing because we docked super early got to explore the places before it got too crowded, the other was not as great but I still really enjoyed it. It was just a little Americanised for my liking and for a cruise around Europe I don’t want that. I’m not American but there is a culture different and this isn’t a bash it’s just there was a lot of overtaking of the tour guides which pissed me off. The other one I did was an Italian cruise line and was one of my favourite trips I’ve ever taken and I’m someone who is kinda bad sailor and freak out on boats and I had no issues.
In both crises, there were plenty on non alcoholic options, the food options were amazing no matter the diet you were on.
You’ve never done one so can’t say you think it’s going to be bad, go in with medium expectation, and try to enjoy yourself. If you go in with your current mindset you will probably ruin the trip for everyone else and you will be the jerk
The crux of the issue is, you want to go to the vintage computer festival or holiday without tourist, I get it. A cruise for me would be a nightmare tbh but for others a dream. Suggestion, you do your thing and she does hers.
I get it but go enjoy that time with your your kids and grandkids. They will cherish this moment that they get to spend with you and I bet you will too.
Let your nephew take your spot and go to the computer show. The cruise itself really isn’t the big problem.
The bigger problem is that you’re resentful and angry. You were surprised by this expensive cruise as an already done deal when you and your wife have an agreement about negotiating purchases over a certain amount of money. She broke that agreement. Your feelings are valid.
Your feelings aren’t going to magically go away whether or not you go to the cruise. Nor should you try to force your feelings to go away without dealing with them. Unless you want your feelings to fester, you should talk about them with your wife. A marriage counselor can be very helpful as a mediator if the two of you can’t do it without it devolving into accusations and fights.
I’m sure your wife had the absolute best of intentions and thought this would be a wonderful idea for you and your family. However, that’s not what you think. Both of you have valid thoughts on the matter and you should discuss them.
You can either go in the cruise with her or let her make memories without you.
Lighten up and enjoy spending time with your spouse doing something they want to do. You’ll be better for it.
Unpopular opinion, dont go on the cruise if you don’t want too. Some people don’t want the cruise experience and that’s ok. Tell her now, so she can make other plans. Why not you go to your festival and she takes the family on the cruise? Just because she is pushing for it, you don’t have to go on the cruise. Not everyone will enjoy a cruise. Aren’t they the petri dishes of the sea anyways.
Open up your mind. Your wife paid money to take the entire family on a trip. Don’t be a stick in the mud or be ungrateful. You’ll have fun if you decide to not be so closed minded.
I had never been on a cruise until about 10 years ago. Had no interest at all. Wife had been on one and lived it. Encouraged me to go. Gave it a chance. Absolutely loved it. So much to do every day, or do nothing. Your choice. Give it a chance. Live a little. Make some memories. You won’t be sorry. I promise. Thank me later.
You have 3 hobbies: car stuff (expensive), vintage tech/computer stuff in general (expensive).
You mentioned nothing about what her 5-6 hobbies are? Chances are pretty good that they’re cheaper combined than yours are.
I know you being resentful will add a negative bias, but it sounds like you don’t even like your wife or want to spend any time with her unless it involves your interests?
She’s been wanting to go on a cruise for years and years. She wants to take your kids and grandkids. She wants to make memories with her family. Do you not want to spend time with them??? You can’t honestly expect a roadtrip with your kids and grandkids to be even mildly enjoyable LOL. So it makes it seem like you don’t want to have a family trip at all, or even care about your family.
Stop being so self-centred and immature and go on the damn cruise without complaints. They’re like fcking floating cities with tons of amenities to explore. You would enjoy it if you get your head out of your butt and at least pretend to like your family.
As for your wife spending money — she’s obviously financially responsible, according to your own words — and spent small amounts on the cruise over time without you even realizing. She understands the financials of the trip better than you. If her spending money is a huge issue then talk about it like an adult.
Just go to your stupid festival you’ve been to before next year and do something your wife wants to for once before she dies. 🙄 From your POV I really have no idea why the hell you’re married, and I would honestly be shocked if you have any sort of close bond with your children & grandchildren since you haven’t once seemed to consider their feelings about this.
So damn selfish my dude.
After she comes back from her dream cruise get marriage counseling with her. If you don’t go on the cruise don’t be shocked if it leads to her being emotionally distant, if to a divorce.
Don’t go. Let your nephew go and they can all enjoy themselves. They don’t need you being a party pooper on their trip they’ve waited a lifetime to go on.
Go play with your cars
You have a serious communication issue in your marriage. Hurry-Get a few sessions with a marriage counselor to work through this particular situation—-
Then, consider more counseling as needed. She breached trust and you guys need to figure out how to address it.
Just go dude. You might actually enjoy it. Best part is you’ll have no internet so you can unplug off Reddit
Oh, you poor, stoic martyr, heroically packing your sandwiches for the Vintage Computer Festival while your villainous wife commits the high crime of… planning a family vacation. The audacity! After 25 years of marriage, raising grandkids, and being the one who actually manages your debt-free life, she finally does something fun and generous—and you respond like she took a crowbar to your Altair 8800.
She didn’t surprise you with a timeshare. She planned a once-in-a-lifetime trip for your daughters and granddaughters. But because it doesn’t align with your monk-like devotion to expired CPUs and $8 t-shirts, you’re “deeply resentful”? Grow up.
You want to “explore non-tourist areas”? Fantastic. Go wander a strip mall in Nebraska while your family makes core memories in Alaska. You’re not just pinching pennies, you’re strangling joy in its crib. Your wife planned a trip with her own money, for the people she loves, while you’re writing treatises on how frugal you were at a hobby convention for obsolete electronics. You’re not a financial wizard, you’re a spreadsheet with a pulse.
The kicker? She still invited you. She still wants you there. And you’re sulking like a toddler because your annual Commodore cosplay weekend overlaps with a cruise. So no, you’re not a jerk for not wanting to go. You’re a jerk because you’re turning a loving gesture into a petty grievance about hobby quotas and airplane tickets.
Let your nephew go. He might actually deserve the spot.
You sound like my dad. A petty, grumpy shit if it’s not all about him, dragging his wife and kids to his own standards of cheapskate misery because it’s more important to make a bad point than make a good memory.
She’s much happier enjoying her golden years with her second husband. Us kids haven’t spoken to him in a decade.
You sound ridiculous and petty.
You sound like a pouty baby. She’s raising your grandkids and wants a break and to spend some fun time with family. Go on the trip, touch grass (or a glacier). Alaska is a once in a lifetime trip. If you don’t go you will not be making your life better in the long run. Vintage computers can’t take care of you when you are sick and when you are on your deathbed will you be glad you went to one more “festival” or will you be sad you missed out on a trip of a lifetime with loved ones? (I’m assuming you love them, but frankly it’s hard to tell from OP)
I just got off an Alaska cruise and they are different. If there is such a thing as cruise for no cruise people, Alaska might be it.
This is not some carribean booze cruise. This is about some truly amazing sights. If you like animals at all, or enjoy hiking at all, or care at all about history or Native American culture, then you will have fun. Go, and I promise that when someone sees a whale out the window and everyone rushes over to see, you will understand.
You may never want to go on a cruise again, but Alaska is legit, give it a chance. Talk to your wife about your feelings, but tell her you’ll give it a chance.
Went on an Alaskan cruise with my family when I was 19, still one of the best trips I’ve ever taken. Feel free to sit this one out if you’re just going to be a stick in the mud. Go to your car thing but you give up the right to be jealous or annoyed when your entire family talks about this time together for the rest of your life.
Is this really the hill you want to die on? You should go on the cruise and enjoy it. Relationships are about compromise. You can’t do this one thing for her to make her happy?
Same boat as you, wife wanted to go on Alaska cruise, me not so much. I changed my mindset to support her. Maybe try to look at it from that standpoint. Is your relationship and her happiness more important than the financial side?
Review of the Alaska cruise – It was an awesome trip with the highlights being the excursions and waking up every morning in a new port or fjord. I also started a new hobby, whittling, so I packed 2 knives in my checked bag to work on during the cruise. Maybe you can pack part of your hobbies to work on to do something for you as well.
Don’t go then. Let your nephew go if you so desperately don’t want to go and spend time with your family don’t. You’re not going to have fun. They’re not going to have fun. Don’t go. You had to come to the internet to tell you to don’t go so that the rest of your family can have fun without you? Okay fine don’t go. Enjoy your computer hobby while everybody’s gone. Spend $100 without asking someone.