Me and my boyfriend had a conversation about what I had accidentally found in his computer, in his networking contacts that I knew about and he’d shown me before but I never saw this section of it I’m referring to. It was a list of women, some of whom had sexual information attached like if he’s slept with them or not, not all women had information like that attached to their name. But it was a couple.
I of course was upset and we had talks and a mild argument about it and he said I put everyone in my life on the list but it’s not a list of women he actively keeps. We’ve had talks about trust and he is an open book, if I ask him about something he’ll tell me. I have access to his computer and room and never found anything besides that list. I don’t look, but if I stumble upon something I’ll ask but that’s never happened.
A few days later he told me he didn’t like this loyalty questioned and he would prefer I approached the situation without assuming. But how was I not to assume given the nature of the information I found. I didn’t outright accuse him of cheating, I did ask if that was a list of women he kept as options. How do go about this. He’s been very open with me about it and anything else I’ve asked, but this is not Joe it build trust imo
*repost because I didn’t add I was looking for advice. I am to be clear.
TLDR: found list containing sexual information from my boyfriend and he’s upset I questioned his loyalty.
Comments
can you explain what this list is? like a group of contacts or something? i truly cannot comprehend what you mean
I mean, I think that’s a pretty weird list to keep, especially if it’s only women on it. That’s not “everyone in his life”, that’s only women.
In relationships each party needs their own private stuff. That’s it. All of this snooping I see and hear about is asking for trouble.
Him having a list of PAST ladies might be odd but not disloyal.
You’re gonna have to give it some time. He has every right to be cranky.