AITA for telling my dad I can’t see how I can help my aunt?

r/

My(19) aunt(39) is my dad’s younger sister. She was contacted by an account claiming to be Arsenal’s official account. Whoever is behind it asked her to ‘help pay for the players’ training.’ She sent them the money.

When my dad found out, he told me about it and then asked me to talk to her. He said that since I’m the closest thing she has to a son, she might listen to me. I told her there are many reasons why I’m sure it’s a scammer. First, Arsenal doesn’t need the money. Second, no blue checkmark that official/verified accounts have. And finally, it’s an English club so you would expect them to have someone from England writing their correspondence. Or at least a person who speaks fluent English. But the English used by the person who messaged her is worse than mine, and I speak English as a second language. One sentence that stuck out to me was ‘We is struggling financially and needs your help.’

I told her the scammer must have noticed from her social media posts that she’s a fan of the team and targeted her for that reason. She refused to listen, choosing to trust the scammer’s word and repeatedly insisting that the club lost money recently. I tried talking to her again several times over the next month but she always said she knows what she is doing. So I told Dad that I don’t see any chance of convincing her. He said I shouldn’t just give up on my family like that.

Comments

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    My(19) aunt(39) is my dad’s younger sister. She was contacted by an account claiming to be Arsenal’s official account. Whoever is behind it asked her to ‘help pay for the players’ training.’ She sent them the money.

    When my dad found out, he told me about it and then asked me to talk to her. I told her there are many reasons why I’m sure it’s a scammer. First, Arsenal doesn’t need the money. Second, no blue checkmark that official/verified accounts have. And finally, it’s an English club so you would expect them to have someone English writing their correspondence. But the English used by the person who messaged her is worse than mine, and I speak English as a second language. So I assume that the scammer is a non-native speaker like me.

    She refused to listen, choosing to trust the scammer’s word and repeatedly insisting that the club lost money recently. I tried talking to her again several times over the next month but she always said she knows what she is doing. So I told Dad that I don’t see any chance of convincing her. He said I shouldn’t just give up on my family like that.

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    > I might be the asshole since I’m essentially giving up on helping out a family member.

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  3. SoupFanatic365 Avatar

    NTA. She wants to FA she can FO.

  4. SoImaRedditUserNow Avatar

    So…. why are you the one talking to your aunt? What sort of outcome is your father expecting? Why isn’t he directly involved? Also, is your aunt generally a moron? How much money are we talking about? Is she an Arsenal fan?

  5. Curious_Baby_3892 Avatar

    NTA. That said, I would have your Aunt give you the contact information they provide and then report it. There should be some department and contact information about reporting fraud/scams. I doubt your Aunt will be reimbursed but at least it would stop her from getting scammed if they scare the scammers.

  6. WiseOldChicken Avatar

    NTA
    A fool and their money are soon parted

  7. Tsunamiblue Avatar

    What are you supposed to do? Ground her? Take away her bank privileges? What authority does your dad suppose you have over an autonomous adult who refuses your advice? Hopefully before it gets too bad, she will pick up on some of the tells of a scam, especially since you’ve pointed them out. You’ve done all you can, short of ruining your relationship with her for no purpose.

  8. Fiigwort Avatar

    NTA sounds like HE gave up on her, why are you the one having to try to convince an adult woman that a club worth £2.5 billion, who apparently pays their top player 280k a week (according to Google), probably doesn’t actually need her money?

    Is it because your dad knows he wouldn’t be able to do it without insulting her? Because in that case, I get it 💀

  9. jabagray123 Avatar

    NTA

    But there’s got to be some way you can report the account as a scam, right? Maybe just to Arsenal? I can’t see why the team wouldn’t want to post something from their official account telling everyone that this scammer is posing as them.

    It’s really hard to talk to older adults about tech and all these things they don’t understand because it’s automatically perceived as condescending. So your father really should be talking to her, not you. The fact that he’s making her situation your problem is pretty messed up.

  10. julesk Avatar

    NTA, I’d tell him you tried so it’s down to him as she’s not listening to you. Not uncommon, as those scammed prefer to think they are special and clever. They don’t want to accept they were duped.

  11. saveyboy Avatar

    She’s not ready to accept her mistake yet. That would involve admitting to herself that she was conned. Expect her to send more money.

  12. LogLower4648 Avatar

    https://www.arsenal.com/fanzone/arsenal-supporters-clubs

    This is the link which has contact details of arsenal supporters groups around the world from their official website. Pick the one near you. It’ll have the contact details of the people in charge of that group. Call them and explain the situation and request them to get in touch with your aunt. She might be more likely to listen to them

    Just an out of the box idea

  13. Kitchen-Ad-937 Avatar

    NTA. You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. If your dad is so adamant on family helping family, then let HIM do it. You are only her nephew, but he is her OLDER BROTHER. What did he do tho help? He shoud try to help too. Maybe then he will see how difficult it is. Or he already tried and can’t be bothered anymore, so he tries to shift it on you.