So my boyfriend had to leave for 5 weeks for the army, and when he came back I had picked him up from the airport which was (40 minutes) on the way to get back home. He completely sat in silence and I tried to give him his gift and talk, and he had said nothing completely ignored me. Then later proceeded to just say I don’t want your gift, I want nothing but silence because I’m sleep deprived. I get it being tired but it came off kind of rude, is this not weird then we got into an argument after wards because he just didn’t seem interested, and after 5 weeks it was upsetting he didn’t even wanna talk or take his present.
just need opinions
r/Advice
Comments
Is this typical behavior for him? Was he a good partner before he left?
That wasn’t tired it was cold. Five weeks gone and he gives you silence instead of love you deserve better.
probably something happened during the time he’s in the army. I’d say give him a wide berth and some space between the two of you until he’s cooled down a bit, maybe a couple days or so.
that’s what I always did when handling people with bad mood.
hopefully he’ll open up during that time.
if not, then you’ll need the help of some irl friends, not internet strangers.
You will continue to receive the treatment you accept
I think sleep deprivation is another level of tired so you can’t always reciprocate the chirpy energy in the moment. This seems like a moment where you could both discuss how you want to deal with those kinds of situations going forward – you can say that if he tells you when he reaches that stage you’ll give him the space he needs, but ask that he still tells you in a polite way. Hopefully it’s just a one-off rude moment and not something he does all the time
How’d it go the next day? Week?
Dump him. That for sure a sign of a bad dude.
I think, take his words and actions with a pinch of salt. Sleep deprivation is no joke, and he may even have experienced something in those 5 weeks to dampen his mood. Give him some time to rest and a safe space to open up. I’m sure he’ll be in a better state in no time. It was just poor timing with the gift.
Is this something that happens often? I go through the same and say similar words when I need a calm moment, and I am not trying to be rude. I am a very happy go-lucky person however I get tired after social or tense situations. Maybe he had an interaction in the military and he needs rest. Maybe stay quiet for a couple days and discuss again later and see what he says.
Why on earth would you be dating somebody in the military anyway? Find a quality guy.
He didn’t have time to find a girl friend. But his view on life has changed. Expect him to stop seeing you. But don’t feel bad. It’s nothing you said or did.
Drop him off at his parents maybe