AITA – Argument with MIL about feeding my child junk food (he has a health condition)

r/

My 6 yr old son has a health condition and part of our doctors’ recommendations include feeding him whole/healthy food.

In a conversation with my MIL today, she blamed my son for accepting junk food she offered him. I tried to tell her, respectfully, that it isn’t his sole responsibility as a child because we, as adults, know he needs to eat healthy food because of his health condition. To blame him seemed so uncalled for and infuriated me. I then told her it is, in fact, her responsibility not to offer him junk food, the same way she wouldn’t offer my pre-diabetic brother-in-law food he’s been avoiding in order to better his health. For context, she doesn’t think that health conditions can be caused by poor eating, but rather they only occur by chance/family history of illness. She doesn’t have much of a sense of the importance of proper nutrition.

She left my house pretty mad at me for calling her out on blaming my son for accepting junk food she offered him. AITA?

Comments

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    My 6 yr old son has a health condition and part of our doctors’ recommendations include feeding him whole/healthy food.

    In a conversation with my MIL today, she blamed my son for accepting junk food she offered him. I tried to tell her, respectfully, that it isn’t his sole responsibility as a child because we, as adults, know he needs to eat healthy food because of his health condition. To blame him seemed so uncalled for and infuriated me. I then told her it is, in fact, her responsibility not to offer him junk food, the same way she wouldn’t offer my pre-diabetic brother-in-law food he’s been avoiding in order to better his health. For context, she doesn’t think that health conditions can be caused by poor eating, but rather they only occur by chance/family history of illness. She doesn’t have much of a sense of the importance of proper nutrition.

    She left my house pretty mad at me for calling her out on blaming my son for accepting junk food she offered him. AITA?

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    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:

    > She thinks he’s responsible for eating clean as a 6 year old. I think we, the adults, are responsible.

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  3. Shellysome Avatar

    NTA Your son is six. Even if he was a teenager, offering him junk food would be considered cruel. So much more so for a little guy who relies on the adults in his life to help him manage a tricky medical condition.

  4. palindrom_six_v2 Avatar

    At 6 years old right from wrong about food is non existent. As an adult if she knew about the condition prior She’s TA here in my opinion.

  5. American_Fangirl_7 Avatar

    Nta – your son is literally 6 years old. Your mil is an adult and should be taking responsibility

  6. ScarletNotThatOne Avatar

    Assuming that you have instructed her about the dietary restrictions and she disregarded the instructions, NTA. And given her attitude about it — thinking she’s fine and you’re wrong — I don’t see how you can leave him with her again.

    It doesn’t actually matter who’s right about the medical issue. What matters is that you’re the parent and if she doesn’t respect your rules, you can’t trust her with your child.

  7. KAJ35070 Avatar

    NTA – clearly. Can we visit that she doesn’t think nutrition affects health? That is wild!

  8. Individual_Ad_9213 Avatar

    NTA. It seems like your MIL’s knowledge on the importance of proper nutrition is woefully out of date.

  9. EmploymentOk1421 Avatar

    Hold tight Mama! You got this.

  10. kiwimuz Avatar

    NTA. Your MIL is a risk as she is causing child endangerment. Stop all contact with your MIL.

  11. 0fluffythe0ferocious Avatar

    NTA. She could hurt your son because she refuses to learn about basic information on health. Where is your husband!?

  12. SulkySideUp Avatar

    NTA. If he were teenager he would maybe shoulder more responsibility for something like this though offering him something she knows he shouldn’t have would still be questionable, but he’s six, expecting him to manage or even fully understand the repercussions of something like that is unreasonable

  13. Fine-Sherbert-140 Avatar

    Of course NTA. Let her be mad if she insists.

  14. DarkSquirrel20 Avatar

    NTA for sure. My 3yo understands her younger sibling’s food allergies better than my MIL. Some of these women are bonkers.

  15. SinglePermission9373 Avatar

    NTA never leave her alone with him again. She sounds like they type who would feed a peanut butter sandwich to a child with a peanut allergy to “prove you wrong”