Context: I’m at the beach with extended family, staying in a condo building with private beach for those staying at the condo building. Beach area is very large and not overcrowded. One morning, I finish the laborious task of muling kids toys, body boards, and our chairs and umbrellas to the beach to set up our spot for everyone for the day. When I get back up to the condo for breakfast, wife who was watching from, says that this on the beach waited until I was out of eyesight, and he and a kid proceed to put up one of our umbrellas and started using two of our chairs. I look down at that point, and the guy then proceeds to move one of our chairs to the waterfront to sit with his feet in the water, which he just left there when he was done using it. I take note of what he looks like and on my way down to the beach with kids, I see him by the pool with rest of his family (he appears to be granddad with wife, with two adult children and their couple children, his grandchildren). I resisted strong urge to say something to the guy at that point. Fast forward to later in the day, and the woman who appeared to be his wife comes down to the beach with one of the grandchildren. She proceeds to walk up to an umbrella that we set up for my parents in law to use when they got down and put her and her grankid’s stuff in the shade under the umbrella. It’s really not a big deal, she put it on the ground, not a chair, and it’s not like we were using the umbrella at the time, but I’m so annoyed with her husband’s helping hisself to our things earlier, that I call back to her and say something to the effect of that’s our umbrella and someone is about to be using it. My wife stops me from being a lot more of the AH I wanted to be by saying something further when she responded that she was just putting her stuff in the shade, but AITA for calling her out about using our things without asking?
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Might they have thought the umbrellas and chairs belonged to the resort?
Might they have thought the umbrellas and chairs belonged to the resort?
So close the umbrella!
So you left your umbrella and chairs on a communal beach unguarded and didn’t think somebody might presume they were communal property. Nobody said anything to the culprits, so they again assumed that it was okay to use them. I’m not saying anyone is or isn’t an Asshole but in my country, if you leave something out in front of your house, it’s assumed to be free to take. Say something in the first instance before it eats you up inside. Don’t leave things in communal areas, it might be theft of someone takes it but you’ve given them an opportunity to claim it.
Setting things up in a communal area early in the morning to “claim your spot” until you’re actually ready to actually show up is an asshole move.
INFO: Couple issues here, 1.) why are you leaving your shit in a public area unnattended? Are you using the umbrellas to “claim” the spots you want, even though you aren’t staying at the beach? 2.) why would you confront the woman for, what seems to me, a much lesser offense when you wouldn’t confront the man about actually taking and using your things?
Unpopular opinion, but why are people so comfortable touching things that aren’t theirs. If you set your children’s toys etc., it should be an unspoken rule that someone is coming back. Especially if it’s just two umbrellas and a few chairs. Not only that, but potentially losing one of your chairs since the grandad left it in front of the water. If it is communal umbrellas and chairs, then they were just lazy to get their own. If it’s your personal umbrellas and chairs then NTA.
Reminds me of parents who try to take my child’s bike at the park and use it without permission. Smh, just because it’s set down for now, doesn’t give you free rein to touch stuff that isn’t yours.
NTA. This is coming from experience with a similar situation. My parents have a timeshare at a beach resort with private access though technically the beach is public (which is likely the case here).
#1. You do not use resort property period because it’s never free. If the chairs/umbrellas are set up you pay to use them. If you put your stuff down on an empty chair you are taking someone elses.
#2. IF the resort has umbrella/chair set up I can guarantee that it has a specific and HIGHLY visible color scheme and lots will be set up so if they set their stuff down on anything else it was clearly private property.
No offense to anyone else commenting here but the idea that leaving things at the beach is somehow leave to have other people use it are insane. By that logic in a city with bike rentals it’s totally reasonable to just take a bike that isn’t chained at the bike rack because “it could be the city’s”. No, they knew it was private property because there’s no way it matched the resort’s property and if the resort doesn’t have rentals then there is no reason to think it would be.
Sounds like you were using a communal beach like it was your own private beach and leaving your belongings all over the place? With no one watching said belongings either?
I think you learned a lesson that most children learn, don’t leave your belongings all over the place and unattended or other people will use them.
Don’t treat a communal space like your own private resort. If you didn’t leave stuff everywhere people couldn’t use it, and instead of going down and claiming your belongings you sat on your balcony judging and being mad about it. Should have been sat on your own chairs claiming that space and this whole issue would have never been created, YTA for that.
NTA a lot of comments indicating people have never been to a beach. People leave things to go in the water, go get food, go for a walk. Especially with condos or cabins, you leave your things for the day and go back and forth. No one touches people’s things. Resort property is always very obvious, I doubt they thought it was communal. I am curious why you didn’t just tell the guy it was your chair? It doesn’t need to be a big confrontation, just “that’s our chair, we need it back over here.”
YTA for leaving your stuff on the beach when you weren’t using it.
If the resort does not have signs specifying that the chairs and umbrellas are exclusively for the use of people in your building, then there are no such rules.
I’m under the impression these are stranger.
What you do is you march right down and tell them, “Please don’t touch our things; this is our umbrella and our chairs.”
Def not the AH.
NTA
If you didn’t say something, it would only keep happening. Hopefully they wil realize they can’t simply take, use or move your things!!