I am 16f, I feel depressed, get upset over stupid things, am obsessed with validation and what people think about me. I just don’t see any point on going on, like what will i really accomplish? A job, having kids, university all things in my future probably. I don’t know if these are things I want to live for. I don’t think there is any point, live my life for like 80 years then i die and it’s nothing. Like it doesn’t matter. Wtf do i do and how do i stop feeling so yuck
How do I stop feeling depressed and stop having thoughts of suicide?
r/Advice
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I’m really sorry you’re feeling this way. Remember, you’re not alone, and it’s okay to ask for help talk to someone you trust like a family member, counselor, or therapist. Sometimes, focusing on small, positive things each day and finding support can make a big difference. Your feelings are valid, and things can get better, even if it feels impossible right now. Please reach out your life matters.
Start to think about the people around you like your family and friends. Would you really want to do that to the people that loves you? Also look at yt videos about this topic
I’m not sure if this is what you’re expecting, but I’m 29F and have survived 3 suicide attempts that I shouldn’t have. And it took me until that third try to finally understand the point of being alive is to be yourself.
Back then:
I tried to please everyone.
My worth was tied to how many compliments I got.
I refused to do anything that might make another person think I was strange/odd/embarrassing.
Now:
I wear intentionally mismatched clothes to make people uncomfortable.
I focus on myself and let the world blur around me.
I dance and sing and draw attention in public because I refuse to not be myself.
Meds can help. Therapy can help. Hobbies can help. But you want the cure?
Baby, the cure is being yourself. Unapologetically. Be you, always, and don’t give a damn about anything else.
Don’t be the darkness. Be the light.
I’m really sorry you’re feeling like this. I was depressed all throughout my childhood and attempted in my teens so I’m familiar with the feeling. Depression is a tricky thing because it actively lies to you and makes it hard to see yourself from an objective perspective. There isn’t a magic fix to depression, it’s a slow process and it takes a lot of work.
If you haven’t, please talk to your parents about how you’re feeling. They can help you look into therapy and medication. It might take seeing multiple therapists and trying multiple medicines to find something that works and that’s perfectly normal. Don’t lose hope if a medication or two doesn’t work; you wouldn’t try on the first item of clothing you try to fit perfectly, this is the same idea.
I know your life seems meaningless now but you’re so young and you haven’t gotten to fully experience it yet. I know it felt condescending to hear when I was 16 too but as a now 20 year old, my life is so different than I expected. In five years, your life could look completely different than right now, you might move, change majors, get a job, decide to backpack around the world, who knows. Life is fully customizable and that’s the joy in it, exploring and molding your life to be what YOU want.
When I was suicidal, I always told myself “tomorrow I’ll do it”, and about one thousand tomorrows later, here I am. That is to say, when you’re suicidal, it’s all about getting through one more day, every day. And with things like therapy, it will feel like you aren’t making progress and nothing has changed but one day, you will look back and realize how far you came. It took doing therapy for a 6 months before I first realized that I actually had started to get better. It’s like seasons where it’s a slow change until you realize, oh wow, it’s summer already.
I know it’s hard to have a lot of the answers be something that takes time but unfortunately, that’s life. The best time to start helping your mental health is always today, and it’s just one step at a time.
Retired Suicide prevention specialist here. Firstly you need to know that many people have had thoughts of suicide and never acted on them. So do not beat yourself up for having them. I also understand that in this day and age being young can cause feelings of hopelessness . This has been a feeling of young people throughout history. With the advent of the internet it has just become a more realized feeling.
From the bit that you have said it seems you’re super focused on what your future might hold. Putting expectations and pressure on yourself is very restricting. You’re young, find yourself a hobby or interest that brings you joy. It might not be the first thing you think of. I had a client who became very interested in crocheting. He was young and was afraid of what other people would think of him. Once he allowed himself to let go of other people’s expectations and opinions he became a master at the craft. He now supports himself totally by crocheting (mostly wedding dresses and brides maid dresses) and makes a bigger income than many university graduates.
I also understand that at your age your parents could be adding to this pressure. Just know that moving forward once you’re a legal adult it will be easier (yet not necessarily simple ) to live your life in a way that makes you happy and not have to live to their expectations.
Please feel free to message me directly if you want to discuss things further and not in a public space . No costs. I just live my life to help those who I can when I can .
I’m in the same boat as you (16M). That ever-looming existential thought is so hard to deal with, especially when I’m alone, which is a lot. I also have the same problem with trying to get people’s validation, and it stops me from ever trying to achieve any thing I really want to in my life. I wish I had advice to give