TL;DR; : F22 and M29. We’vebeen dating for the last 8 months and im very anxious and worried bc of his behavior.
I am on vacation for 2 weeks and I’m in the middle of the first one while my bf is in another city (same time zone tho). I told him he doesn’t seem like he cares much lately and he said he just like his time alone, is reserved and has his own issues going on. Which I completly understand these factors can affect the relationship but it came into the point of him not texting goddmorning, I love yous, goodnights, doesn’t update me, doesn’t seem to be much interested in what’s going in my life (i was on a party and said some updates but he never asked anything), he also ghosts me in the evenings as he plays video games with his friends which he admitted.
Update: he barely talked to me today and when I asked if its all okay he said “not now please, I’m fine but feeling depressed”
I’m not ksure how to cope with this behaviour and not sure if this neglect is fair from his side or maybe I’m just being childish and needy?
Comments
You should consider finding a boyfriend who likes you.
Girl you’re not being needy, you’re asking for basic effort. If “I’m depressed” means he can game all night but not reply to you, that’s a red flag with wi-fi. You deserve someone who actually shows up, not disappears with a headset.
You shouldn’t feel like you’re begging for crumbs of attention. The fact that you’re questioning if you’re too needy shows how starved you are for care. If he has time to game with friends every night but does not send you a goodnight text, that’s a choice. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.
Is he normally better and closing up only now that you are not there? Your description makes me think he is pissed off at you for some reason, not coping well with your absence maybe?
Have you tried to have a conversation on the matter in video call?
Edit: or maybe, as most people here will tell you, he is a gobshite, disrespectful, uncaring, possibly cheating and you must dump him immediately /s
He likes his alone time. So give it to him and dump him and stop asking for crumbs of attention.
I think you should just be with somebody who wants to have the same sort of relationship you do, with good morning texts, check-ins, and who seems more excited to talk to you in general. What you want is extremely normal, and you can definitely find that in a relationship, just not with your current bf.