So i’ve been dating this guy 25M for a bit over a month. He’s a sweet guy with very little dating experience which he told me about at first and i don’t mind it at all. I don’t know if it’s just that or also other aspects of his life. But more than once or twice, when we talk about stuff he is very vocal about the fact that he’s insecure. He literally says that way. And one time he told me ‘you’re so beautiful and im an insecure guy i dont know what you’re doing with me’. I don’t know.. for me it doesn’t harm my ego and i appreciate the honesty but it kind of makes me feel weird and affects my attraction to him. I dont want to say im completely turned off because im not but there is an odd feeling that comes with it i dont know how to describe it.
He’s also very open about all his difficulties and struggles, mental health problems etc and sometimes he gets quite negative. I told him that he’s literally good looking and smart and he just has many good things about himself that he doesnt see and i meant every word of it. And in a way my issue is the fact that it’s mostly all going on in his head (imo tho, i might be wrong). He also gets clingy sometimes and i have to reassure him. Sometimes he acts like a little puppy around me and even he admitted that, i find it very cute but sometimes it freaks me out. He’s not controlling at all and is understanding. But for example he’s already asking about when he’ll meet my friends and such which is a reasonable request but for me it’s still early and i want things to stabilise. But he said it made him sad when i expressed last time i still want to wait before he joins my outings with my friends. Generally i don’t talk to people about my partner until it becomes 100% very serious. But now im having some doubts.
I want people’s opinions. How bad is it dating someone who’s quite insecure? Many people use it as the no1 insult but i know better we all carry them to different degrees in our lives. Is it normal for me to be partly unattracted to him because of that or should i work on that part? Also would a relationship work with someone who’s like that or would it become exhausting long term
TLDR : the guy im seeing is quite vocal about being insecure among other life issues. A part of me is affected by that and losing part of the attraction. Is dating someone who’s insecure as bad as people say ?