I left an abusive marriage with my daughter when she was 10 months old she is now 3. Her father, my ex husband moved to another country with his affair partner but would communicate with our daughter occasionally through FaceTime.
He cancelled a trip to meet his daughter in January, I’ve attempted to reach out but we have not heard from him since. His family have tried to contact him but he’s told them he wants to be left alone and blocked them.
My 3 year old is becoming aware that she does not have a father in her life. Today she sat by the window and looked out. She said she was waiting for her daddy. I did not know what to say. I’ve ordered a book off of Amazon called “where is daddy, who is daddy?” I hope this helps when I arrives.
However I am struggling to find a way to explain this. Has anyone else been through this? How do I tell her that her father does not want to be in our lives?
Comments
My very humble advice would be for you to contact your pediatrician and let them advise you.
Needless to say, this is an exquisitely sensitive and delicate matter for your daughter with profound psychological repercussions.
Others here will share their own experiences, but keep in mind that your daughter is unique, and the experiences of others may or may not apply.
Regards.
Just say, “Daddy can’t be here right now, but you have me and so many people who love you.” Keep it simple, reassure her she’s loved, and give extra hugs when she asks. You don’t need perfect answers, just love and honesty. You got this, you’re doing great💙
I feel bad for the kid. Idk why men marry, give a child and then vanish off. Im glad I never married. Fkd up world
A session with an expert counselor would be ideal, I’d go with simpler until they are older.
“Not all families are the same. Some don’t have mommies, some don’t have daddies.”
i also started experiencing this with my son when he was 2 1/2-3 ish, he goes to daycare and sees all the dads and in all his shows they have “daddy” so he did eventually begin to ask “where is my daddy” “I want my daddy” I cried at first but eventually I just explained to him that he does have a daddy but he isn’t here right now, I also reiterated to him how much mommy loves him and that mommy will always be here. I tried to explain to him in kid terms that sometimes daddy’s aren’t ready to be a daddy but that’s not a reflection of him & again just reiterated how much I love him. They understand more than you know and hiding it from them can cause irreparable damage…
also as someone who grew up without their father in their life, I have known for as long as I can remember. my mom was also honest with me about it and i am thankful for that. While I did grow up and have a father figure and a person I consider my “dad” i do not believe it has really impacted me or my life, I eventually reached out to my bio dad solely for the purpose of learning about my generics, I don’t need someone in my life who didn’t want nor need me in theirs. my mom always made sure that I felt loved, wanted and safe. i would also suggest building your daughters confidence, how a a person/man doesn’t define who you are in life, how capable she is etc.
also feel free to msg me if you’d like. my son just turned 3 at the end of March