I (18F) may be moving out to live with 2 of my best friends (S and K) (both 19F) and I’m so scared of leaving my dad(52M) as it’s only him and me.
For context: It’s been me and my dad since I was a kid. My mom passed away when I was 7 and he remarried to a woman who was abusive to us both for 10 years. They just got divorced last year. My dad and I have always been extremely close and always go on trips together. He’s truly been my best friend and biggest supporter in everything I do. He had his downsides when I was a kid, causing both of my brothers to go no contact and move out at my age, and my dad has grown since then and I’m so proud of him. I’m now an incoming college sophomore with a boyfriend of going on 10 months and today I had my friends ask me today if I would be willing to find and rent somewhere with them. Both of them are somewhat knowledgeable in living without their parents as one (S) has already lived in a dorm and another (K) has had her own experiences living alone. The main difference between them and I is simply, their parents wouldn’t be alone. S does have divorced parents and lives solely with her mom but her mom has 3 other kids to keep her company, K’s mom has a boyfriend to keep her company. Here, it is only my dad and I. It’s hard for me to even imagine not living with him as I’m so used to just waking up sometimes and going to sit with him in the living room or coming in from a long day at work and ranting about customers. I guess I would just feel extremely guilty about leaving him alone even though I would not be moving far at all. Yes I know he would only be a call or text or drive away, but it still hurts to think about. I don’t want him to think I’m going to leave him like my brothers did. If anyone has any advice on how to help me just not feel guilty and understand that it is simply just the process of growing up I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you so much in advance.
TL;DR: 2 of my friends want us to find a place to rent, but I feel so guilty about even just thinking about it because it would mean leaving my dad by himself.
Comments
Living on your own is EXPENSIVE. It’s not something to do on a spur of the moment. Sit down and talk to your Dad about the expenses of living on your own, the expenses of collecting things for your kitchen, bathroom, living room, bedroom. Then realize that being friends and living with someone are two totally different scenarios which can ruin friendships. You may need a quiet night to study when your roommates decide to have guests over. Sit down and talk to your Dad and he’ll help you understand what your real choices are.