I (F28) and SO (M31) are having our first LO! Super exciting time for us as we’ve been together over a decade and are finally growing our family!
There’s not even words to describe how entitled and shitty my JNMIL is. I’ll give a brief history and then move on to the reason for the last breaking point for me. Which was our gender reveal this past Sunday.
To give you a readers digest version of why I hate my ILs:
•SO is the only son and they used to live 15 minutes from us. That meant when we bought our first home that SO was their landscaper for all 7 acres of their property every single weekend day. Important to note, we needed to have time to do our OWN landscaping. (They had previous been paying people to this, so exploiting SO for his “duty” to family)
•JNMIL told us that just because we bought a house near them that we couldn’t come over whenever we wanted. (Not a problem I only went when invited and when we could use their Olympic size pool) That they might be playing “cowboys and Indians” disgusting to tell your son and his wife that While on our honeymoon we gave SIL a key to check on our cat twice a day. Well ILs decided to tag along and come into our house without asking. JNMIL made rude and unnecessary comments about every choice we made in our home. Like ma’am I don’t care you weren’t invited in the first place.
•Didn’t come to our wedding (JNMIL went to SO’s cousin’s wedding in a state 10 hours further than ours) We even cancelled our destination wedding because it was too expensive for them (they are literally millionaires ugh)
•JNMIL never has made a point to get to know me or offer to help with anything even when asking for her help. I was super frustrated because I sent a book of a text asking if she wanted to be involved in wedding planning. She claimed I had the wrong phone number and never responded and to this day still texts from that number.
•Even though she was a nurse for 25+years doesn’t believe in vaccines even with having immuno-compromised parents. Got deeply offended when we said she would not be around our infant that will be born in RSV/cold/flu season without getting said vaccines.
I could keep going there’s so much more. This is just to give you a partial picture as to why i despise being around her.
So Sunday we had our gender reveal! We had asked for JNMIL to bring pictures of SO as a baby. That’s all we asked, she didn’t even bring frames which I shouldn’t have assumed she would bring frames. We made it happen but come on.
My mom who is a borderline JN had planned everything from decorations to making all the food. JNMIL didn’t offer to help which is to be expected at this point. SHE SHOWED UP WITH A QUARTER PACK OF NAPKINS. I can’t imagine not doing a single thing to help except pictures and bringing an OPEN quarter pack of napkins.
Reveal time!! We are having a baby girl! Instead of being able to celebrate JNMIL immediately calls both sets of SO’s grandparents the moment after we found out. I couldn’t even celebrate with the people that came I had to talk to the people on the call that she thrust in my and SO’s face. I did excuse myself to talk to my family and friends while SO dealt with his grandparents after I said thank you.
JNMIL never even said congratulations, in fact ILs left without saying a single thing except asking when we could go to dinner before they left to head back to Florida.
I do apologize for this long post, it is my first time posting in /JUSTNOMIL. If you want more I could write a book so I can and will post more. This was very cathartic to get down for once. SO is a great partner, but he can’t wrap his head around saying no to his parents.