Anyone just finding you don’t want to be having “relations” (didn’t know if reddit would block the s word)as it is the only way to guarantee not getting pregnant.
Fear of pregnancy without decent healthcare or life saving medical care during pregnancy,
Or life saving medical care if such things as ectopic pregnany,
Or just unwanted pregnancy without access to abortion.
Fear of having kids and not being able to get them basic needs like housing, healthcare, food. Or education, child care.
Fear of being legally/financially entrapped by a man once pregnant.
Also just not dating because you don’t trust the government/courts/police to protect you if he gets abusive. (Not that they already do such a great job)
Comments
if i were an american woman of childbearing capability i’d move to a real democracy.
Demand for r/sterilization has apparently exploded
Yes. I refuse to date any “man” who voted for troll and I live in a red state in a rural area.
More people are getting vasectomies/their tubes tied than at any time before. So yes, at least the reproductive part. I didn’t date before (I just don’t like people often) and I don’t date now so nothing changed for me lol
No because I live in a state where women’s health is still protected (knock on wood).
But if I live somewhere where that’s not the case, I think the fear and choice is super valid.
I have been solo on purpose and abstinent for 4 years. It will stay this way for the foreseeable future. You could not pay me to fuck a man let alone dating one.
I’ve been on a couple dates with a guy I’m starting to like, a lot. It hasn’t gotten that physical yet, and I am thinking about what I’d be comfortable doing if/when things keep progressing. I live in a blue state and so don’t have the worries a lot of people have, but in a country that would elect a convicted felon, known pedophile, and adjudicated rapist, it’s hard to imagine that anywhere is really safe, isn’t it?
And now we find out that the entire GOP is so devoted to protecting child rapists that they closed the government early rather than have hearings on releasing Epstein’s records. An entire political party in this country is in the grip of pedophiles, and not a single member of that party in elected office has changed affiliation in protest.
yup. 4B 🙌🏼
Had a horrible fibroid, but have been begging for a hysterectomy for the last 20 years and was finally successful. Just had to have my health absolutely go to shit first.
After my two long term relationships with men and witnessing married couples in my own life, it’s an easy choice for me to not date. It just feels like endless emotional labor, kin-keeping, and weaponized incompetence. I feel like I lose myself while trying to keep the relationship alive while there is complete lack of reciprocal responsibility and respect. No thanks.
Really freaking glad I moved from a red state to Chicago last year. I want a baby. I’m 36 and I don’t have the luxury of waiting another 4 years on purpose. My lifelong desires haven’t changed because laws have changed. Yeah, it sucks right now. But I got off birth control last year. I’m not changing for that devil of a man in office.
Can I ask, non-judgmentally, why you’d be concerned that Reddit would censor the word sex?
I’ve considered dating but then, I remembered that most men are Conservative non non-political and even if they said they aren’t they’re most likely lying so, that kinda turned me off to the whole thing.
No.
The only thing keeping me from getting sterilized is not wanting to return to having a period, so I keep my IUD in the meantime. I have also talked to my partner about a vasectomy to be incredibly certain. I will not put myself at risk.
Left my abusive, deadbeat ex-husband two years ago. Thankfully, we never had kids. I haven’t been intimate with anyone ever since, and no plans to be intimate with anyone anytime soon. There are fabulous devices these days, if I feel the itch, and frankly the devices tend to do a far better job than their human counterparts.
Didn’t feel.like doing research and got blocked for things that surprised me recently
I’m married and on bc, but just the stress of everything makes it hard to be intimate
I live in Idaho too, so yeah, reeeeeaally banking on not getting pregnant
I had my tubes tied a long time ago, and I have good respectful partners. I also live in a blue state that, so far, will still enforce domestic violence laws and protect abortion access. But yeah, I hear you. I got divorced during the Biden admin, and I will never again let myself be legally tied to a man.
If I wasn’t past menopause already, I’d be trying to get sterilized. Things are just too scary right now.
I’m ace, so I don’t have sex because I don’t want to have sex.
I did really want to go to Tennessee to visit Smoky Mountains National Park, though, but I won’t go now because if I were to fall off one of those mountains in the park, a doctor there could refuse to provide me with medical care because they have “moral objections” to my unmarried and ace (part of the LGBTQ+ spectrum, the “A” in LGBTQIA) lifestyle. Because I choose not to get married and crank out a million babies, I can be left to bleed to death in Tennessee.
I mean I love hearts not parts so I just switched to women
I am married with no kids and not worried in the immediate future since I live in a very blue state with a lot of protections, plus I have 1 year left on my IUD. I did try to get my doctor to recommend changing it early but they didn’t go for it. We’ve talked about the possibility of a vasectomy, but I am less inclined to get my tubes tied since it is much more invasive and I can’t quite shake the horror stories about chronic pain, etc.
I have excluded the possibility of moving back to my home state despite my whole family living there because it is among the worst for reproductive rights. It feels like a real possibility that I could die with an ectopic pregnancy or be prosecuted for a miscarriage.
I’m 49 and have pretty much given up on dating or ever finding love. If it happens, great. If not, oh well.
That and a whole lot of other things that I’m not sure are strictly political but def related.
I’m childfree. I love kids, but I don’t want to be a parent. I am on birth control for health reasons but I intend to stay on it even if I one day magically didn’t need the pill anymore. Most men I’ve dated have either changed their mind (allegedly lol) and decided they want kids, or admitted they were hoping I would change my mind. This mindset that I’m supposed to follow their lifestyle choices instead of accepting that there’s an incompatibility and being honest with me instead of trying to manipulate me into agreeing shows entitlement. I notice a pattern where men treat my life choices as secondary which is very not cool.
I also have medical conditions that limit my ability to do certain things. I think the ability to be aware and empathetic to those differences especially as far as freedoms and privilege go, is very important and also a skill that many men seem to lack. While that isn’t a political view (I think anyone can lack that kind of emotional intelligence no matter what their views are), I can see it possibly affecting their beliefs. I’ve already had exes who totally disregarded or were straight up hostile over some of my limitations (for example, not being able to have penetrative sex without excruciating pain leading to fights and even SA at one point) and maybe I’m just unlucky and there are more men out there who aren’t a total nightmare but the damage is done and I’m tired.
I haven’t been with anyone since COVID. I see no reason to end my hiatus. Besides my wand is way better than any man.
I got an IUD put in again. Lasts at least 5 years,
Yup. All I need is a sex toy and a hot fictional character.
I’m well past menopause but even in my late 40s, I grew very tired of just the general attitude of men and their poor treatment of me and countless other women I know. Now, this was before Trump, and since I’ve taken myself off the dating market for a bit over 10 years, I’m much happier now. I have a good job, good friends, my pets, and I get to travel and indulge my other hobbies whenever I want.
I can’t imagine what dating must be like for 20 and 30something women these days, between the misogyny and political views of Kumquat Pol Pot and the GOP overall. After the Dobbs decision that overturned Roe, I can’t see why any woman would feel safe getting pregnant, though I do know a few women who have had planned pregnancies, and I’m happy for them. Add on the influence of Jordan Peterson, that bastard Tate, and others, and the future can look really bleak for women, especially if they’re not white and wealthy.
All of this said, however, I am ready and willing to fight alongside the younger generations of women to regain the reproductive rights they’re owed, as well as for equal pay and other issues supported by feminists. The Dobbs decision is a stark reminder that we can be set back a half century by one Supreme Court decision and conservatives would take us back a century or more if they could.
We are not going back. Especially not without a fight.
Abso-fucking-lutely.
It helps that I have been single for nearly a decade and am perfectly happy not to be dating men or centering men in my life in any meaningful way. Also, I don’t really care for babies or children.
I would get sterilized, but being celibate is free of charge, so… there you are.
I’m transfem so I don’t have to worry about pregnancy, but 70% of men that reach out to me on the apps (and even once in person) are married or have girlfriends. A lot think it’s somehow enticing to brag about having a girlfriend, or complain about how sexually unsatisfied they are. It’s made me so dispassionate towards relationships in general.
I’ve also been assaulted and suffered health consequences because of it. I know other transwomen in dedicated relationships with cismen who were given serious STDs because their partner was cheating.
I just simply don’t trust men; they’ll say and do exactly what they know you’ll want just to get in your underwear, only to discard you when it becomes inconvenient for them.