so for context, me (18F) and my boyfriend (19M) have been dating for about two months. we met on a dating app but decided to be in a relationship because he asked me if i wanted to and i said yes. the whole two months we’ve been together was a rollercoaster. he’d ask for cool offs when we fight and i’d be there left crying my eyes out because he chose to leave temporarily instead of talking things out with me.
fast forward, we were in a video call. i saw him using his phone and he was swiping right and left on bumble. i screenrecorded the duration of the call and confronted him after. he told me it was just a game between him and his dormmates and that his dormmates gave him an earful for still joining the game even though he has a girlfriend. he apologized and he said he won’t do it again. but of course, i’m still scared that it will happen again because he had a history of cheating on a partner because he’s scared that “his partner would cheat on him first”.
though i do understand that he’s hesitant of trusting me because i came from a dating app but i never knew it would lead to that. he would also accuse me of going on dating apps and that i’m hiding him from the world but i have him on my insta bio, i have highlights of him, i posted him on my socials, and we even have an account together where we post our pics. he accused me of being on facebook dating under the alias “denise” because this person used my picture but i’m not even on facebook dating and i’m not that low to cheat on my partner.
going back, he apologized and said he won’t do it again and that he still wants our relationship to work. i said i still want it to work too. then he accused me that i only want things to get better for the both of us so i can get revenge on him because of what happened. of course, that’s not true. i genuinely want things to get better for us and i’m not that low to get revenge.
i’m not mad, i’m just disappointed. disappointed that he chose to do that even though he has a girlfriend. it’s like he doesn’t even respect me as a partner. how can he tell me he loves me when his perception of me is that i’m a cheating, secretive, lying woman?
tldr: been dating my bf (19m) for 2 months. things have been messy—he asks for space after fights and recently i caught him swiping on bumble during a call. he said it was just a game with friends and apologized. he has trust issues and keeps accusing me of cheating, even though i’ve been nothing but loyal. i want things to work, but i’m hurt and disappointed of his actions.
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leave now while you can. youve been dating for two months. honestly, he is accusing YOU of cheating which most likely means that HE is cheating. you are young and there will be someone out there who will see the whole world in you. best of luck
Cool so you caught your ex boyfriend swiping in bumble while you were in a video call.His perception of you being a dishonest, cheater is him projecting because he is both of those things.
On the plus side you’ve only wasted 8 weeks of your life to find out the boy is a clown and not worth your time. Dump him.
“then he accused me that i only want things to get better for the both of us so i can get revenge on him because of what happened.”
You’re 18. Throw the boy away. I was with someone doing something similar at 18 (but honestly not even as bad, at least my ex didn’t turn it around on me somehow) and he’s an ex for a reason.
If he can’t even apologize without accusing you of worse, it won’t get better.
He doesn’t respect you at all. Especially if he’s doing this at 2 months. Think about it, he’s bold enough to make you cry 2 MONTHS IN! He’s bold enough to be on a dating app swiping and looking at other women in front of your face!
Please value yourself and leave this dude. Don’t listen to his promises because they are lies. If you stay, you WILL regret it later. If he’s bold enough to do you this wrong at the beginning when he’s supposed to be on his best behavior, then he’s going to be terrible to you later on when it really counts/matters.
He accused you of cheating to cover his own.
Guaranteed you can find a man that’ll treat you better. Don’t waste your 20s on this loser.
Trust. Me.
You’ve only been dating for 2 months and you’ve made multiple posts to complain about him.
Just break up, this is clearly not an actual relationship.
The only men that have ever accused me of cheating were actively cheating on me in that moment.
Not only does he have absolutely no respect for you, but he also believes you’re gullible and dumb. Of course he was attempting to cheat on you!!!!! That’s the only reason to swipe on bumble. Chances are overwhelmingly likely that he’s already cheated.
“I came from a dating app” lmao what does this even mean? Only you came from a dating app?