TLDR; Lately we’ve been arguing a lot. I ask for space when I’m upset, but he won’t give it and tries to fix things right away. It makes me shut down and feel disconnected, which is messing with our intimacy.
Most of our fights start when he says something that really hurts my feelings. I try to communicate that I’m hurt and usually ask for a bit of space so I can calm down before we talk. But he doesn’t seem to respect that boundary. He wants to fix everything immediately, and when I ask for space, it often turns into more conflict because he pushes to keep talking.
I’m someone who needs a moment to breathe when It gets heated or if he starts talking over me, but he tends to get heated and talk over me. I try to stay calm and communicate clearly, but I’m starting to feel like I’m always the one trying to navigate the conflict in a mature way. It’s exhausting.
Another thing that came up is that he’s been confused about why we haven’t had as much sex lately. He even questioned if I’m still attracted to him, which totally blindsided me. I absolutely am attracted to him, but I don’t feel as emotionally connected lately because of how much we’ve been arguing. And that emotional disconnect makes me not want to be intimate.
How do I communicate that I need space in a way he’ll actually hear and respect? And how can we reconnect emotionally when we’ve been stuck in this cycle?
Comments
Honestly, IMO communication starts w/just bein real with each other.
You can communicate everything perfectly but he has to absorb it and respect it. The fact that you’ve asked for space multiple times and he doesn’t respect is the problem. Also why would you want to have sex with someone who hurts your feelings all the time? Like read the room dude. He’s gonna have to try to get on your level or this ain’t gonna work