Are you the kind of guy that holds in a fart in public (especially on airplanes)?

r/

Flew from Atlanta to La Guardia and back today. Currently in the air heading home. Holding in my farts.

When I was walking through the terminal in La Guardia some fucking knob walking in front of me just rudely ripped a loud one. I will never be anything like him.

Comments

  1. AutoModerator Avatar

    Please do not delete your post after receiving your answer. Consider leaving it up for posterity so that other Redditors can benefit from the wisdom in this thread.

    Once your thread has run its course, instead of deleting it, you can simply type “!lock” (without the quotes) as a comment anywhere in your thread to have our Automod lock the thread. That way you won’t be bothered by anymore replies on it, but people can still read it.

    I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

  2. na_ro_jo Avatar

    No, I just rip ass. I might try to be silent if someone is speaking.

  3. DeviousCrackhead Avatar

    As long as there’s plausible deniability, I’ll rip a silent but violent. It’s uncomfortable and unhealthy keeping them in, and I also get a grim satisfaction from knowing that other people are forced to endure my stinkers.

  4. alexdaland Avatar

    I try to hold in, if Im on the street – fuck it. But in a plane or whatever, I dont want be “that guy” my fella passengers tells his friends about for 5 years.
    Im educated as a commercial pilot though, so, however, because of pressure changes – you are basically climbing the rockies in 5 minutes, the airplane is pressurized to “liveable” leves, but still like 7000ish feet depending on the plane.
    So in the same as a pack of sealed chips, your stomach will create gas – and that has to go somewhere. You can hold it in while you are awake, but not when you sleep. So knowing this, what I do is normally go to the bathroom after 30ish minutes on cruise, even if I dont have to. There is most of the time a bit of “air”

  5. barefootguy83 Avatar

    It’s a normal body function; there’s no moral superior award for holding it in; you’re only hurting yourself. Just do it when you need to and be discreet when possible. On a plane it’s tough to be discreet so you don’t have too many options. People just gotta deal.

  6. MoistGovernment9115 Avatar

    Yeah I hold it. Just go to the bathroom and let it out there. Simple.

  7. gamiscott Avatar

    I just try to be mindful of if I’m moving in a close public space (like going to my seat on a plane) so that I don’t drop dust folks. Otherwise, if I’m walking in an open public area or already seated, I’m letting them go.

  8. Vyckerz Avatar

    Nope, I let fly, but not if they are going to be loud like that. I would also not drop one close to people if I could avoid it.

    On the plane I would hold it and go to the bathroom.

  9. suboptimus_maximus Avatar

    Yes… But especially not airplanes 🤷🏻‍♂️

  10. ElectricMilk426 Avatar

    On a plane? I’ll hold it. I take some chances at work though, and I probably would at the terminal

  11. miserable_coffeepot Avatar

    Nope, gotta let them out. Equal rights for the deaf.

  12. Abucfan21 Avatar

    You say you will never be “that guy”.

    Wait till you turn sixty.

  13. More_Mind6869 Avatar

    No I let it out slowly.

    Then I say,” hmmm do I smell popcorn ?”…

  14. DarkSociety1033 Avatar

    Farting in front of people is very rude. I always find an empty room or bathroom if I feel a loud one coming. However, if you happen to hear someone slip and they seem surprised/apologetic, just let them be. Will never forget when I was crouched down and one escaped and I hastily stood up to meet the eye of the one coworker that heard it, who just gave a smile and went back to her work. Also, as you get older, your sphincter gets weaker. My late grandmother went off like a tommy gun all the time shortly before she died. If you see a really old person going off, don’t blame them unless they look like they’re going off on purpose.

  15. Azipear Avatar

    I’ll open the air nozzle, wait a minute so nobody connects the dots to what’s about to happen, do a little trial fart to get a feel for whether it’ll be silent, adjust if necessary, and then open ‘er up all the way for full relief.

  16. Ibraheem_moizoos Avatar

    Depends on the situation, how bad I have to fart, and how many many MAGA supporters are around me.

  17. holdemNate Avatar

    Let it out silently and then ask the person next to you “Is something burning?”

  18. KYRawDawg Avatar

    Absolutely I do this. I can suffer with a little discomfort, it’s not going to cause bodily injury to me and I’d rather not make somebody nauseated when they’re sitting cramped right next to me and throw up all over. I mean normally I don’t produce that type of methane but it is possible and I’d rather not risk it. I even find that if I don’t indulge in any food prior to getting on the plane, it’s no issue. I enjoy those pretzels however micro they are.

  19. MouldySponge Avatar

    I don’t really hold it in, I just let it out extremely slowly, like a slow release pressure valve. If you do it right there is no sound and no smell.

  20. DeezFluffyButterNutz Avatar

    I started holding my farts when I started dating. I didn’t fart around my date or my girlfriend. Sometimes it would even hurt bc I couldn’t do it when I stepped away.

    Even now I don’t fart around my wife and she does the same for me. I’ll do a toot if I’m in a different room but I won’t drop a stink bomb off if I’m near her.

    As far as public, I’ll try not to be obvious about it. I may crop dust an aisle if I’m in a store and no one’s there.

  21. WhiteySC Avatar

    Um…no if you don’t then you are that guy! You’re the nasty SOB that’s always dropping the SBDs in public? Nasty boy.

  22. 2cats2hats Avatar

    You don’t need to hold it on a commercial flight. The air is recycled often and farting is a top reason.

  23. Direct_Disaster9299 Avatar

    Not on a plane, but you can bet I’m letting it all out in between gates

  24. Kingofcheeses Avatar

    I rip ass freely

  25. JudgeSevere Avatar

    I’d just let it out slowly and quietly

  26. SmallRocks Avatar

    I try to be as polite as I physically can about it. I don’t let it rip in public if I can avoid it.

    People who get a satisfaction out of doing it publicly on purpose deserve a right hook to the jaw for forcing me to taste their shit particles. 😂

  27. pirate694 Avatar

    No…. i just go take a shit and fart in the washroom.

  28. spander-dan Avatar

    I turned 50 and developed a new philosophy in life, “Never trust a fart!” I will go to the shitter to pee because I’m now about 50/50 on drawing mud.

  29. ChessieChesapeake Avatar

    Currently on a family trip and I farted in an airplane soon after takeoff going to our destination. It was silent, but my daughter noticed the smell. We were near the back and she asked if there were bathrooms in the back and I said yes. She said they stinked. I didn’t correct her. 🤣

  30. Revolutionary-Dog835 Avatar

    Farting on the plane is fine. It absorbs into the seat cushion.

  31. FeistyDoughnut4600 Avatar

    No, crop dust for maximum effectiveness

  32. NoOneStranger_227 Avatar

    Jezus, dude…you’ll give yourself a rupture. Go to the washroom. You really need to be told this?

  33. MouseAfraid9784 Avatar

    Omg.. when I am on the airplane is when I rip the most farts! 😂

  34. dbrmn73 Avatar

    Theres more room out than in.

  35. toguraum Avatar

    Finally a good topic.

    Yeah I hold it while in public. But if I catch an opportunity I will rip a silent one.

  36. GrolarBear69 Avatar

    That big dude that’s sweating, yeah he’s saving everybody’s lives and you need to give props because his tummy is doing mean things to him and he’s fighting for you.

  37. misteranderson918 Avatar

    crop dusting is fine, gassing out a plane, not so much

  38. WastedKnowledge Avatar

    Always hold it if I can in public. However it also caused the worst stomach and digestive pain I’ve ever experienced when I had to hold it for a cross country flight with three stops. I was sweating and cramping at the end of the flight, all because I didn’t want the girl next to me to know I too fart

  39. spanktacular66 Avatar

    I try to crop dust as often as possible.

  40. JustaddReddit Avatar

    Crop Dusters unite !

  41. coyote500 Avatar

    Nope. I’m all about the SBD life

  42. Substantial_Long_911 Avatar

    I mean if Im on a plane, depending if its causing me discomfort ill just go to the bathroom.

  43. Practical_Abalone_92 Avatar

    I fart blanks on planes. I don’t know why. But there’s not a single molecule of aroma

  44. Brave_Negotiation_63 Avatar

    I always go up to first class. Then when they send me back, I rip a loud one just before going back through the curtain. Then everybody claps in economy.

    Just kidding of course.

  45. Metalfreak82 Avatar

    Sometimes you can’t hold it in any longer… But I can feel if it’s a silent one or not. And yeah, the smell is your problem then.

  46. N1LEredd Avatar

    I just blast em. Full throttle open the vents and shake the seat action. I’ll look for and hold eye contact.

  47. Thisoneissfwihope Avatar

    I will let her rip, and if it really smells laugh uncontrollably.

    Farts are funny.

  48. Mistaken_Stranger Avatar

    Every creature on the planet farts! I ain’t gettin a bad guts because everyone else is too stuck up. Let ‘er fly!

    edit: Farts being a loose term.

  49. Banned3rdTimesaCharm Avatar

    Hell no, the seats are so close together no way to know who dealt it. Let the mystery continue.

    Or i’m flying business and i can fart all i want in my cubicle.

  50. King_Kongs_fingers Avatar

    Do you also hold in the farts from your vagina?

  51. C_A_M_Overland Avatar

    I let em fly at will with little to no regard

  52. ReddtitsACesspool Avatar

    I used to be like you. Can’t believe I carried myself in such a way

  53. Dude_McHandsome Avatar

    I prefer to let them out slowly, wait til we can smell it, and look at the guy next to me like “how dare you!?”.

  54. felton639 Avatar

    Out and about, no. In enclosed spaces or near people, mostly yes if it’s for a short duration. On planes or long train rides I usually get a feel for the type and severity, and if the stars align in favor of silence.

  55. Subject_Skill_7883 Avatar

    Letting the pressure out in the jetway after landing is one of the great joys of life

  56. Hot-Impact-5860 Avatar

    When I sit on the chair, I try to focus my weight on my ass so that I fart directly into the chair. That minimizes the risk of smell, because it uses the chair’s cushion as an air filter. I think.

  57. UncoolSlicedBread Avatar

    I try to mask the sound of the fart by exclaiming loudly, “Omg, who farted?”

  58. Garthritis Avatar

    I thought you get ejected from the plane if you fart so I’ve never taken the chance. Plus I’m not great with a parachute.

  59. Bohottie Avatar

    Do the old drop your book and fart technique.

  60. ReactionAble7945 Avatar

    I am the type of guy who holds it in until I get in an elevator with other people.
    Then I let it out and look at the woman next to me and ask loudly, “good God what did you eat?”

  61. roentgen_nos Avatar

    Yep. A lot of days I am completely unaware that I am holding them in until I am standing at a urinal at work. Sometimes all hell breaks loose back there!

  62. Wild_Front_1148 Avatar

    Having too many farts in your body while taking off and landing fucks you up bad. I had the worst cramps of my life and was shitting foam for a full week. So no I dont hold them in on airplanes anymore.

  63. Vegeton Avatar

    Hold it in at all times in public unless I hit an empty public area where no one will be impacted, like finding a nuclear exclusion zone for farts.

    Once I needed to fart really badly, but I was on a public train, only problem was I fell asleep and woke up with zero need to fart. This moment haunts me and makes me laugh.

  64. sjmiv Avatar

    I hold it in if I can. If I have to rip one I just cough over it. Works every time

  65. DIYnivor Avatar

    I like to use the boiling frog method. Release one “bubble” at a time spread out over the duration of the flight. Use olfactory fatigue to your advantage. Requires pro-level asshole control.

  66. musing_codger Avatar

    Seriously? I am a man over 30. I long ago learned how to fart silently. And if it smells, I’ve perfected the disgusted side look at the person next to me. 

  67. NotBatman81 Avatar

    Yes, my mom taught me manners.

    There is a bathroom on your plane that comes in handy for bathroom stuff.

  68. sisyphus_met_icarus Avatar

    I have Ulcerative Colitis. It can actually be painful for me to hold in a fart sometimes. I still try to be quiet about it though

  69. SignalBaseball9157 Avatar

    farts are always silent so I fart everywhere, I sure as hell won’t endure the pain just so people won’t endure the potential smell of my farts

  70. Jussepapi Avatar

    On a plane? Let them rip, son. Let ‘em rip. It’s only my GF who knows it’s me.

  71. BoringExperience5345 Avatar

    I’m gonna venture to say based on your use of the word “knob” that you are from the UK and I believe that might be the difference you are thinking of lol

  72. Chuterito99 Avatar

    Mi nah hold it back. Mi just let it guh and act like mi innocent victim, then stare pon somebody else like dem do it.

  73. Odd-Sun7447 Avatar

    I let them rip, and them look at my wife and say, OMG baby did you just fart that’s so smelly!! even when it was me the whole time.

  74. EloquentBarbarian Avatar

    On a plane, I’ll go to the toilet to fart.

    Never trust a fart. It could be loud, it could be smelly, it could be a shart. Never trust a fart.

  75. op3l Avatar

    Airplanes I let them go. No point as it all goes in the cushion which I’m pretty sure absorbs most of it. And if it doesn’t the air circulation is fast enough that I’ve never really smelled a nasty fart.

    Now those oils them older asian folks use, those are annoying. They smear it on all over and ugh stinks up the entire cabin.

  76. Sorry-Government920 Avatar

    I have no shame I’m letting it rip then giving the person next to me a WTF look like they did it

  77. N-Y-R-D Avatar

    Nope. That causes cancer.

  78. cannontd Avatar

    If I have plausible deniability, yeah. Best thing to do is seek out a baby as that’s a great cover story.

  79. Tactless_Ogre Avatar

    Nah, let er’ rip.

  80. Hopeful-Savings-9572 Avatar

    I’m not holding anything in. Maybe I’ll try to let it out quietly on a plane. But otherwise let er rip tater chip.

  81. Some1farted Avatar

    I just tell the woman sitting behind me to pull my finger