I (17M) am a senior in high school and have never had a girlfriend. I’ve always wanted one (obviously), but I never had the guts to ask anyone out. I could never tell if someone liked me or not, and for me it’s really hard to talk to someone when I know their interests and hobbies are completely different from mine (video games, basketball, etc.).

There was this girl from my work—I’ll call her “D” (18). I never really talked to her unless something needed to get done. So, we weren’t friends—just coworkers. My brother, K (21), also works at the same place. I only worked one day a week at the time, and he worked three. Him and D worked together on all the days he worked, and they became friends. They started to hang out more during work, and eventually even outside of it. D would come over to our house with K every couple days. They didn’t do anything crazy or sexual, just hung out. D had a boyfriend at the time, and her boyfriend knew about her and K being friends—he was chill with it.

Their friendship lasted around 4-5 months until it just… stopped. I never asked K why. He told me they both agreed to stop being friends. D quit the job not long after, though I don’t think it was because of K.

Fast forward a whole year to February 2025, and I randomly felt the urge to message D. We were always kind of social back when she and K hung out, so it didn’t feel awkward. She responded, and we texted for a few days. I asked her if she wanted to come over sometime. She said, “That would be awesome!” We set a date (mid-March 2025), and she came over.

K was at work and my stepdad was out of town, so we had the house to ourselves. I want to say now: I find D very attractive. She’s the only girl I’ve met who really understands me—my humor, interests, everything. So I kind of saw this as a “sort of” date. She’s also now single (not sure when she broke up with her boyfriend).

We went to dinner, came back to the house, watched TV, and ended up lying on my bed for two hours—just talking and watching TikToks. No physical stuff. She left before K got home.

I didn’t tell K she came over. I didn’t know how he’d react—if he’d be cool with it or hate it—so I just kept it to myself. A few days later, she came over again. This time, we got closer. In my bed, we held hands, and she rested her head on my shoulder. It was the first time I’d ever felt physical affection from a girl, and I was ecstatic.

Then she invited me over to her house. Even K had never been there. I brought her two bouquets of flowers and a teddy bear. I also gave a bouquet to her parents when I met them. They were super kind and welcoming.

We went to her room and turned on a movie. At first, I awkwardly sat on the edge of her bed, but she invited me to sit next to her. We got cozy. She wrapped a leg around me, rested her arm on my chest—I held her hand and put my other hand on her thigh. It got really intimate (again, nothing sexual). After the movie, she asked if the flowers were my way of asking her out. I nervously said, “If you’re down.” She laughed, said she wanted to be with me, and kissed me on the cheek. It was my first kiss. When I got up to leave, she walked me to my car, wrapped her arms around my neck, and puckered her lips. I hesitated, but she said, “It’s okay.” So I kissed her.

I drove home with a huge smile on my face.

I got home and went to K’s room. He asked me where I’d been. That question was really hard to answer. I could lie… or tell him the truth. I decided to be honest and told him I’d been at D’s house.

His face dropped.

He then spoke to me in a way he never had before. He was hurt—genuinely. He asked if D and I were “just friends.” I said no and explained that we’d been texting for a couple weeks and had gotten closer. I didn’t go into every little detail, but enough for him to get the idea.

That’s when he snapped. He said something like:

“Don’t even think about being with her. She’s a narcissistic attention whore who only does things for herself. She fucked my life up. Now all I do is play video games and smoke, and that’s partially her fault. She led me on, used me, backstabbed me. She would talk about disgusting stuff she did with her boyfriend and made me feel insecure and uncomfortable. You should have told me when you started texting her. If you date her, I’ll still love you—but I won’t hang out with you. I won’t be your friend anymore.”

I was completely caught off guard. I had no idea he hated D this much. I genuinely thought they had ended on good terms—that’s what I was told. I told him I was sorry, and that I didn’t know he felt this way. He’s going through a rough time in life, and honestly, I feel like I should put him first.

So I texted D and told her I had to stop seeing her. She was shocked and had no clue that K still felt that way. I gave her the full rundown of what he said, and she handled it really maturely. She said she understood where K was coming from… but that she really liked me.

We kept texting, and now it’s present day. D’s been asking if there’s anything she can do to fix it, or if I think there’s any way to change K’s mind. I’ve had to sadly tell her every time that it’s probably impossible, and that we might have to end things way too early.

That said, I’ve decided I do want to talk to her in person one more time. We set a date—April 9th—for me to go to her house and just talk. Settle everything, ask questions, say whatever we need to say.

I really like D. Like… a lot. But I’d feel horrible if K couldn’t even stand to be around me anymore. He’s my only sibling. My best friend. I don’t want to hurt him.

But at the same time… his reasoning feels off. He was 20 and D was 17 at the time. She had a boyfriend her age. I don’t know why he expected something to happen. And from what D told me, she never saw K that way. She literally said:

“K was like a brother to me. I never thought he liked me like that. I never liked him that way either. That’s why I thought it was fine to talk to him about whatever.”

So now I’m stuck in this place where—for the first time—I’ve found someone who likes me for me. But moving forward with her might mean ending a 17-year bond with my brother and one of the last strong ties I have in my family.

AITA?