So, I made a post yesterday about my MIL and rules/boundaries. If you’re interested please go to my profile and read. Basically we have a very strict rule that has yet to be respected by my in laws. The rule is they must only come to our home to see our six month old daughter when we are both home and they’ve called to arrange a time (for the time being – as it’s respected things may evolve). Well, they are mad about this and think it’s controlling so it’s been a month and a few days and they have yet to come see her. Once my mother in law barged in while I wasn’t home. They’ve been invited many times but will not come.
Today I took my daughter to our community pool. We were in the back and I was nursing her while taking a break from swimming. My MIL saw us and came over and then proceeded to follow us around the entire pool. I wasn’t letting my daughter out of my arms for her to take, but she followed us everywhere to “swim with us.” She followed us until we left. There have been so many problems and so much disrespect. My husband said to be calm and peaceful and not tell her to leave us alone even though she was pushing my boundaries. She called my FIL multiple times telling him to come to the pool. I’m defeated and there is much more context in my previous post from yesterday.
Please tell me where to go from here if you can 😭 I really don’t know how to go on from here or what consequence to place moving forward.
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If you are uncomfortable with her following you, leave, or tell her to leave you alone. If your DH won’t back you up on that then he isn’t supporting you or your feelings. That is straight up harassment and you shouldn’t be forced to tolerate it.
Consequences should be where it hurts- Zero visiting for X amount of time, ONLY texting to check-in but JUST your DH. Time out for x amt of months where you dont see or hear anything- and if they break that rule it adds another month.
Unfortunately you guys are the ones who have to enforce the rules and apply the consequences.
Sorry, but if she was stalking you at the pool you speak up. You are tying yourself in knots to please your husband. Why is he worried about speaking up?
If in public you say, “stop stalking me.” Make sure others hear.
Once again, your dh is a huge failure. You should absolutely tell them to leave you alone. Where is he ever? Like why is he never supported you?
Honestly OP I have no words other than to offer my condolences on having an absolutely spineless husband. His mother was harassing you, in public and he did nothing but tell you not to tell her to bugger off. You have my deepest sympathy and my only advice is to shine up your own spine and start defending your own boundaries because if someone doesn’t enforce them, they are merely suggestions.