My brother Mikey (22M) and I (21F) are roommates. Over the past few months, Mikey has been dealing with back pain and stomach/bowel issues. After a concerning incident, I encouraged him to see a doctor, but he kept forgetting. With his permission, I scheduled the appointment, mentioning both the back and stomach issues. The office had trouble categorizing the appointment, but they assured me everything was set.
When we got to the doctor, she said she could only address the back pain, as Mikey had a physical scheduled soon (which neither of us knew about). I was caught off guard, as I thought both issues would be addressed during this appointment. I asked the doctor if we could please discuss the stomach issues as well, explaining that I had made it clear when scheduling. She seemed irritated but reluctantly agreed and ordered a stool sample kit.
Afterward, Mikey told me it was a scheduling mistake and that I shouldn’t have pushed the doctor to address the second issue. I understand that there may have been a miscommunication, but I was just concerned and wanted to ensure both health issues were taken seriously. Mikey doesn’t always prioritize his health, and I wanted to make sure nothing gets overlooked.
AITA for insisting the doctor address both issues?
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My brother Mikey (22M) and I (21F) are roommates. Over the past few months, Mikey has been dealing with back pain and stomach/bowel issues. After a concerning incident, I encouraged him to see a doctor, but he kept forgetting. With his permission, I scheduled the appointment, mentioning both the back and stomach issues. The office had trouble categorizing the appointment, but they assured me everything was set.
When we got to the doctor, she said she could only address the back pain, as Mikey had a physical scheduled soon (which neither of us knew about). I was caught off guard, as I thought both issues would be addressed during this appointment. I asked the doctor if we could please discuss the stomach issues as well, explaining that I had made it clear when scheduling. She seemed irritated but reluctantly agreed and ordered a stool sample kit.
Afterward, Mikey told me it was a scheduling mistake and that I shouldn’t have pushed the doctor to address the second issue. I understand that there may have been a miscommunication, but I was just concerned and wanted to ensure both health issues were taken seriously. Mikey doesn’t always prioritize his health, and I wanted to make sure nothing gets overlooked.
AITA for insisting the doctor address both issues?
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NTA that’s literally their job. Kinda shown by her caving from any pushback.
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I think I might be the asshole for insisting the doctor address both issues because it could be seen as overstepping or undermining my brother’s choice on what to focus on.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA
This is too vague, because it’s different depending where you are. I’d love to say NTA though.
Of course this is the U. S. – you did not say and I don’t have to ask. Only in the United States would a doctor ignore part of a health issue when diagnosing as they could be related and one issue.
NTA for trying to help your brother get seen and address the health issues.
INFO Why are you involved in your brother’s health? Why are you in his medical appointments? Does he want you there? Has he given any indication that he did not want to address the bowel issue, or does not want to do so with this doctor, or does not want to do so in your presence?
You are definitely not TA merely on the doctor’s account, but I am concerned that you might be TA to Mikey (and to the doctor if she actually had instructions from Mikey that were contrary to yours).
NTA
Every doctor I have ever seen asks me if there is anything else going on with me after we address the primary reason for the visit. It’s weird that your brother’s doc pushed back against that.
NTA
NTA – getting good health care requires constantly advocating for yourself. It shouldn’t be that way, but it is.
I’m not going to leave a judgement, but this is an FYI:
Many insurance companies have policies that they will only cover one thing at an appointment. That is why when you scheduled it the office had trouble categorizing it. It is possible that your brother’s insurance will refuse to pay for the stool sample testing and your doctor may have to eat the cost.
I worked at a physical therapy clinic and if we were seeing a patient for a back injury and knee pain they had to make two different appointments, and we could only treat one thing at each appointment. So, if they came in for their back, but their knee was really bothering them, we couldn’t touch their knee and could only work on their back if we wanted to get reimbursed. The US healthcare system is seriously fucked up.
NTA
I was incorrectly schedule once when I asked for a physical and to have my nexplanon removed so when I got there I was told I would only get the physical that day. I declined the physical and had the implant removed. It was actually quick enough they had time to do both- but the point being. Mistakes happen. They should have at least asked which concern was more pressing and then went from there.
NTA
No !! NTA— you were advocating!!! I’m glad you pushed !!!
NTA and everyday I am glad for Brazilian healthcare system
NTA at all
NTA it needed to be scheduled for 30 or 45 minutes, it was probably scheduled for 15 or 20
NTA. With the cost of a visit, you should address as many issues as possible! What a crazy idea that you have to schedule a separate highly expensive visit for each issue you have