I don’t post or use Reddit often. I just thought these people would understand.
My 38F mother and 40M father have been in a neglected relationship for years now. For context, my mother is a very emotional person who has OCD and went to therapy for it (it’s not ‘cured’) and my father is an emotionally distanced man who puts time and care into me and my little sister (6F) but no energy to my mother. They can’t even have a conversation without my father turning it into an argument. As a father, he’s the best I know and he’ll forever be my superhero. But as a husband, he holds so many significant flaws I can’t bare sometimes. Whereas as a mother, she lacks multiple flaws and gets into my nerves every single time, but as a woman I feel her so deeply that it moves me to tears. My mother is also mainly financially dependent on my father – she works at a grocery store, but that not enough. She also stays home all day (not my fathers fault) and doesn’t have much friends. I hope my mom gets to speak her sadness and live the life she always wanted, be the independent woman she always envied and be loved the way she always desired. Couples therapy is probably not on the table due to cultural reasons & the price – I don’t think my father will spend more than 140 EUR on one session for his wife. Date nights NEVER happen, and I don’t think they have intimacy because my little sister still sleeps in the same bed as them. And my mother can’t even talk about this to anyone in the world because her family lives in South Asia (we’re in Europe) and she doesn’t want to put stress on them. Is there anything I can do or suggest to help my parents?
TLDR; Desi parents are good people but not compatible with eachother, won’t divorce. Can I do anything to help?