I (22F) have been dating this guy (22M) for a few months now. To preface, my BF is a sweetheart and has been the best guy I’ve been with as he has treated me really well so far. I am also usually not the jealous type, as I have not cared much about my exes female friends in the past.
I always knew my BF had a female friend, who I’ll call K. K and my BF have been friends since early high school days. However, I noticed he had been texting her or had recent chats with her on his phone. He told me that he was messaging her about an overseas trip she went on. He told me his phone password although I’ve never asked nor questioned him on anything and I went through his chats with her to quench my curiosity (I know this is ethically wrong as it is an invasion of privacy but in today’s current dating climate I don’t want to waste my time or youth to a man who communicates via Snapchat) and I found nothing of note.
The only other female friends he has are his friends girlfriend’s, who he does not text. My BF also told me I shouldn’t worry about her as K wanted to pursue/had a crush on my BF’s best friend and brother, never my BF. His brother also mentioned that she was “just like a sister.” K and my BF also don’t hangout in person as far as I know, as he is mostly hanging out with me or his friends. I have not met or spoken to K since meeting my BF. K is a relatively attractive girl and is currently single.
To make matters worse, I’ve been having dreams that he has been cheating on me multiple times! Is this a sign from God to investigate further, or my subconscious messing with my emotions?
**TL;DR;**: Sweet BF (daily??) texting long-time female friend who previously pursued BF's brother and best friend, should I be concerned?
Comments
Your subconscious is messing with your emotions. There’s nothing here. He appears to be an open book.
>I have not met or spoken to K since meeting my BF.
You need to meet this girl. Do whatever it takes to make it happen. Right now, everything about their relationship is just a theory to you and you’re likely filling your head with every terrible assumption possible about her and him and what they’re like together.
No amount of him protesting “she’s like a sister to me” will ring true so long as you only have the fictional version of here to compare that to.
Arrange a group dinner, a hang, an online hang, a phone call, a weekend trip… whatever.
To me personally, it sounds like you’re just over worrying you and K is definitely just a friend