AITA for almost “ruining” my dad’s relationship

r/

I 31 F made a bumble and tinder account. I just wanted to see what online dating was all about since I haven’t dated for a hot minute. I wasn’t looking for anything , just curious and trying to see what I like.

I noticed my dad scrolling on bumble on day and tinder. He told me he goes on there when he is bored. He had a girlfriend and in my head I thought that was wrong. His girlfriend knew I was on bumble and one day she asked if anyone had messaged me, I said I don’t know because I deleted the app because my dad popped up on it when I was on the app. (Which is true and it freaked me out). I told her it freaked me out and I didn’t want him mad at me so I deleted the app. I told her that the age was off so I think it’s an old account and don’t worry. I didn’t tell her what my dad said earlier in this post because it’s not my place.

The second time, I was on tinder and was talking to someone and I told her I deleted the account because my dad was on there. I didn’t mean to say it, it just slipped out and I immediately said I should t of said that and I’m so sorry. She did confront him about it. They didn’t break up but my dad came home and yelled at me at the top of his lungs saying I was manipulating his girlfriend and trying to get them to break up.

To be honest, he was on there from the beginning and I didn’t mean for it to slip the second time.They are not together anymore because of another issue a few months later but am I the asshole?

Comments

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    I 31 F made a bumble and tinder account. I just wanted to see what online dating was all about since I haven’t dated for a hot minute. I wasn’t looking for anything , just curious and trying to see what I like.

    I noticed my dad scrolling on bumble on day and tinder. He told me he goes on there when he is bored. He had a girlfriend and in my head I thought that was wrong. His girlfriend knew I was on bumble and one day she asked if anyone had messaged me, I said I don’t know because I deleted the app because my dad popped up on it when I was on the app. (Which is true and it freaked me out). I told her it freaked me out and I didn’t want him mad at me so I deleted the app. I told her that the age was off so I think it’s an old account and don’t worry. I didn’t tell her what my dad said earlier in this post because it’s not my place.

    The second time, I was on tinder and was talking to someone and I told her I deleted the account because my dad was on there. I didn’t mean to say it, it just slipped out and I immediately said I should t of said that and I’m so sorry. She did confront him about it. They didn’t break up but my dad came home and yelled at me at the top of his lungs saying I was manipulating his girlfriend and trying to get them to break up.

    To be honest, he was on there from the beginning and I didn’t mean for it to slip the second time.They are not together anymore because of another issue a few months later but am I the asshole?

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    Welcome to /r/AmITheAsshole. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment.

    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:

    > I accidentally let slip that my dad was on dating apps to his girlfriend. I don’t think I am. Also he still brings it up saying I’m manipulative when I don’t see how. Just want others perspective on it

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  3. Fit_Sandwich2605 Avatar

    NTA. Your Dad was in a relationship and shouldn’t have been on those apps, even if it was because he was bored. He knows that and tried to shift accountability. His own actions caused it. 

  4. DemureDamsel122 Avatar

    Your dad is trash and his girlfriend deserves better than him. He ruined his own relationship by being shady. NTA

  5. Totallynaturalvibes Avatar

    NTA. Your dad certainly is though.

  6. archetyping101 Avatar

    NTA

    He’s the one on tinder. He bears sole responsibility for the consequences. People are only on apps if they’re not serious and keeping they’re options open. He’s mad that he got caught. You’re not his keeper and you shouldn’t have to cover for him.

  7. JFKcheekkisser Avatar

    You are way too old to be using the “it slipped out” excuse. Just own up and say you told his gf on purpose.

  8. NearbyCow6885 Avatar

    WTF? You’re 31??? The way you talk you sound younger than 18.

    Whatever. You’re NTA. Even if you did spill the tea to his gf on purpose, it was your Dad that poured the tea to its brim.

  9. Several-Adeptness-83 Avatar

    Lol no he’s TA for being on dating sites with a girlfriend

  10. A-namethatsavailable Avatar

    NTA, he shouldn’t be on there while in a relationship. He has a lot of growing up to do

  11. BiggestJohnOfThemAll Avatar

    NTA. Your dad’s kind of a piece of sh!t though.

  12. kityyo Avatar

    YTA mind ya god dang business

  13. Sensitive_Steak_5737 Avatar

    NTA.

    If it was any relative and their girlfriend you still wouldn’t be TA.
    If there is two options and one of them saves a person from getting their heart broken, thats the one.

  14. Traditional_Koala216 Avatar

    NTA. He was in a relationship and looking to hook up. He got caught. That’s on him.