My MIL has made obsessive comments about my daughter’s diapers since she was born, even though I change her constantly. I change her even more around my MIL even if baby doesn’t need to be changed. She acts like if I don’t change her every 20 mins I’m equivalent to a mother who doesn’t change their baby all day and leaves their child in a sagging soiled diaper.
She’s also a baby snatcher, so I’ll literally change baby, she will get immediately taken from my arms by MIL, and then 30 mins later MIL will say it’s time to change her, she’s so uncomfortable in her diaper. Then MIL will either change her while stating over and over again how uncomfortable baby must be in her soiled diaper or stands over me watching while I change baby which makes ME so uncomfortable. She also holds the wipes and counts how many I’m using. If we’re out in public she insists on following me into the bathroom so we can “change her together.” And then if there’s a hint of any blue line on the diaper she shoves it in my face and goes SEE ITS BLUE. SHE WAS SO UNCOMFORTABLE. When MIL was the one holding her and wouldn’t give her back…also babies pee very often so I don’t know what I’m supposed to do to ensure her diaper never turns blue ever. My husband doesn’t see anything weird about this behavior or why it would upset me.
Btw my baby is the happiest, most calm baby who hardly cries, sleeps through the night and has never had a diaper rash. The diaper obsession is driving me insane and it feels like these comments are meant to make me feel like I’m a horrible neglectful mother. Four months postpartum and I just want to cry every time she does this.
Comments
Quick Rule Reminders:
OP’s needs come first, avoid dramamongering, respect the flair, and don’t be an asshole. If your only advice is to jump straight to NC or divorce, your comment may be subject to removal at moderator discretion.
^(Full Rules) ^(|) ^(Acronym Index) ^(|) ^(Flair Guide)^(|) ^(Report PM Trolls)
Resources: ^(In Crisis?) ^(|) ^(Tips for Protecting Yourself) ^(|) ^(Our Book List) ^(|) ^(Our Wiki)
Welcome to /r/JUSTNOMIL!
I’m botinlaw. I help people follow your posts!
^(To be notified as soon as nataliegirlhithatsme posts an update) [^click ^here.](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=botinlaw&subject=Subscribe&message=Subscribe nataliegirlhithatsme JUSTNOMIL) ^(|) ^(For help managing your subscriptions,) ^(click here.)
^(I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please) ^(contact the moderators of this subreddit) ^(if you have any questions or concerns.)
Sounds like your mil does not understand improvements in diapers. Still back in the day. I don’t know if such a thing exists, maybe on the big diaper manufacturers’ websites; perhaps there’s a video or history you could make her review?
Otherwise, respond “she’s just fine, I’ve got this. ….. I don’t need any help, thx. “ over and over.
And your partner can tell mom to knock it off.
Ah NO. Stop commenting on her diapers is you want to see her.
Stop following me when I change her.
Husband can get on board or not. But, this sh*t would stop.
can you not just tell her ‘no thank you i’ve got it , why don’t you go relax.. i like to be the one doing diaper changes ‘
Diapers like Huggies especially are so absorbent that even if the line is blue, you really can’t feel anything there. That would be really annoying and it’s also wasteful. Maybe ask her to bring you a new package of diapers every time she comes to visit, then she can be “helpful” that way
Wth is she OCD? Stop letting her dictate how often your child gets changed and stop allowing her to follow you and boss you around
Is she obsessed with diapers or…..? I’d be concerned that she wants to help change diapers and watches while you do it. It seems like she’s looking for an excuse to change LO. That’s unusual behavior and creepy. If she was a man with this fixation, I’m sure you’d be more creeped out.
It’s time to start telling her no and setting boundaries. “MIL, I’ll be doing all diaper changes privately from here on out.” “LO needs privacy for diaper changes, I’ll wait for you to leave.” “No, baby does not need their diaper changed right now.”
Yeah, no more of granny takeover at diaper changes. Only you and husband change diapers. When finished changing her, baby wear.
Maybe ask her why she is so obsessed with the baby’s diapers. Did one of her kids have a horrible diaper rash?
Also, SEE HER LESS!