I (m29) dated a woman when I was 19. She was my first hug, kiss, and lost my virginity to her. She cheated on me in the very beginning and was very selfish throughout the rest of the relationship. I was naive and let feelings cloud my judgement. She graduated a semester earlier than me so I broke up with her after she graduated. 1.5 years with her. Spent every night with her, never separated. Then cold turkey. She tried to reach out two times after than over the past 3 years, after we broke up. All her exes looked somewhat like me as well. Including the guy she’s with now.
I told her to please stop reaching out. Since I broke up, I tried to have sex one more time and couldn’t perform. I have trouble talking to women and several beautiful women have shown interest and I just ignore them and stop any advances. I tell myself I hate her but after I found out she’s pregnant I just broke for some reason.
It was the right move ending things I was hurting knowing someone I cared so much about never treated me right even when I treated them perfect. But as time went on I changed into a someone who argued all the time towards the end. I left for the better.
That being said, it felt like a heartbreak again. I never think about her or have had any sort of feeling for her 8 years afterwards. I was left broken and she’s forgotten about me. I feel confused. I cried a bit.
I’m alone and would like some advice.
Comments
you went through something deep, and even though it’s been years, those kinds of relationships leave a mark. She wasn’t just your first kiss or first time she was your first everything. even though she treated you poorly, you still cared. That messes with your head. It’s confusing when someone you gave so much to didn’t give back
And now, hearing she’s pregnant it hit you Because part of you that remembers what she could have been to you, That’s grief. You’re grieving someone who already left your life, but now it’s really, really over. That’s a hard thing to swallow, even if you don’t love her anymore.