i’m sixteen and my single mom just passed in a car accident last night. i don’t have many family members and she’s all i had. i’m hoping for anyone who has lost a parent to give me any advice. i only have my older sister who’s 20 and my brother who’s 25 and i genuinely don’t know how to go on and i have nobody to talk to. please share anything that could help me as i genuinely feel like im going to messed up for life
i just became an orphan
r/Advice
Comments
I am really sorry you had to go through this at such an early age.
Grieving is a long and necessary process, take your time, cry as much as you need, keep close to your siblings and go through this together.
No person can ever replace a mother, but this wound will heal in time, and you have to stay strong and live a good life for her.
I wish you healing..
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. If at all possible have your siblings be present with you now. Not online. Not on the phone. In person.
Some pains we aren’t made to take solo.
Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry. Losing a mom is incredibly painful, and it’s just not fair. Everything you’re feeling in your grief is completely normal. Remember that as time goes on.
I’m in my 40s and still cry a little each day. My mom has been gone a couple of years. I think it means we loved them deeply.
My therapist suggested watching videos, looking at photos, or writing down memories. It’s painful, but it can also make them feel so present.
Grief looks different for everyone. Some might be angry, others sad, or some need to stay busy. There’s no right or wrong way. We are all doing our best.
When you’re ready, there’s a grief support subreddit you can check out.
Above all, remember you’re not alone. You have family, and you can grow that family through love. Anyone can be a part of our families. You can create your own circle of support. Let people around you know what you need – they might not always know how to help, but they will want to.
Sending you virtual hugs.
Edit: clarity
Oh and be gentle with your siblings, if you can. We tend to take grief out on each other, but everyone is hurt. Trust me, I struggle too!
And one more thing – you won’t be ‘messed up’ for life, but you will have a tough time fixing anything permanent you do as a reaction. Don’t do anything major right now. Give big decisions a few months if possible
Wya
This is so heart breaking. It is such a life shattering feeling to lose a parent. Especially when it is sudden and unexpected. Will you be able to stay with one of your siblings? Consider seeing the counselor at school.. they can help figure out how to make school easier for the time being…
I’m so sorry, Sea-Worth!! Are you able to reach out to a counselor or favorite teacher at your school?? I’m sending my love and hugs 😇😇
my condolences OP😕. i really think reaching out to your school, or youth community resources for support right now will open up some doors for you! if your siblings and you are able, take the time to share her memories and connect. as a girl who was 16 so little ago, i can only imagine how burdening this feels. you are loved <3
If your situation gets bad, like in you feel like there’s no way out, because you can’t make it on your own, you can always get government and medical help.
I’m sure that the hospital emergency room can guide you better?